FemaleUnited KingdomMember since 21 Mar 13Age 21Last online 1 years ago

17, aspiring writer, media student, photographer, tumblr addict♥

  • JustAmay
    4 years agoReply
    I really liked this :)
    It has the details to make you want to read on, and I definitely would.
    The only thing I would say is to maybe put more paragraphs in or when someone new speaks give them a new sentence :3
    Hope this helps you in anyway!xx
    Isn't it funny?
    Isn't it funny?
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    For the Young writer of the year competition, these are the first three chapters for the competition, if you'd like more email me madeleineflint@hotmail.co.uk- My formatting is fucked in places as I'm...
    JustAmay
    4 years ago
    The part with the teacher, she says sorry and the teacher speaks on the same line, and her speech in the same paragraph after. Then when her and the boy first talk, her sentence starts about half way through the paragraph.
    That's all I can see, I think. Sorry, aha xx
    Maddie.
    4 years ago
    Ah awesome thank you muchly :D I hate it when it changes it cause I never notice :') xx
    JustAmay
    4 years ago
    1 Like
    You're welcome :) - That happened to me when I uploaded, haha. I had to go back and correct things, it takes a while to do. xx
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