FemaleUnited StatesMember since 21 Jan 13Last online 2 years ago

Eh hi I'm trying okay.
I do a lot of outdoor adventure stuff like hiking and white water rafting and rock climbing.

  • Rio.o
    4 years agoReply
    Hi! Sorry I havent gotten back to you for aboout three weeks for the "a chapter for a chapter" critic request comment thingie I set up but I have been busy with school and such but I am here now you yay!

    Ok, I really like this story. Ususally I read a story, critic it, then move on, but with this story I am totally going to keep reading, and criticing when I post new chapters for my stories so we are even :)
    Anyway, I really like your writing style. You keep it light and easy to read without boring anyone or making it childish. That is very hard to achieve so kudos to you!
    I agree with the comment below me. Of you could use more variety in your puntacation that would make it even better. Nothing else really stood out to me as what I like to call "sucky" or "poopy".
    I really hope you keep going with this story and great job so far!
    The Immortal
    The Immortal
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    Would you fight the evil that surrounded you? Would you risk your life to save another's? Would you try to save the whole human race? Well, would you? If anyone had told Avia Green she was the only person...
    _emilykaye_
    4 years ago
    AHAHDGBWS thank you! Haha and don't worry, I wasn't expecting you to review my story in a couple of seconds. (I totally forgot anyway so...haha) Thank you so much again and yeah I agree. I'm so honoured my story isn't sucky or poopy!
    _emilykaye_
    4 years ago
    I'll comment on your story now
  • Rio.o
    4 years agoReply
    sorry I was supposed to review this months ago!
    Anyway, I really like this story. In the beginning you take your time to set the stage, which I personally enjoy because it helps me as the reader to understand the story as a whole more.
    I also think that the relationship between the brothers is very accurate. You have set a good pace for the storyline... starts slow, gets faster, a major event, climax, then slows down. Of course you have only covered one of those so far since you aren't done yet :)
    I really think you should continue with this story and make the chapters a little shorter. I would hate it for people to stop reading sucha good story because they don't want to get stuck in the middle of a chapter.
    Most vampire stories are told from either a depressed girl's or an indignant girl's point of view. The fact that this story is from a boy's POV is refreshing and will definetly be a challenge at some parts because you want it to be real, but aren't quite sure what to make them do or say at some parts. Trust me, I speak from experence.
    I hope you choose to continue and wish you luck! I'm excited for your review on my story too!

    see ya I guess!
    Channing
    Grave Consequences
    Grave Consequences
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    The sleepy little town of Steeplehill has one secret that's finally been unearthed. *An entry for the Coldest Girl in Coldtown competition.*
  • Rio.o

    critic fot critic

    4 years agoReply
    if you read my story and leave a comment on the chapters telling me what i need to improve on, then i will do the same for you. however many chapters you do for me, i do for you.
    lizam
    4 years ago
    Chemical NumbersWhat if death didn't apply to you? What if you could have infinite second chances at life? That's what the Numbers seem to have, endless chance...
    elizabeth414
    4 years ago
    heyy i would love some feedback. I will also critique ur work too.
    The Red BalloonWill two best friends be able to escape a forest? Or will the stalker clown claim them before anyone can help?
    Xoxo_onedirection_xoxo
    Hey I would love to give u feedback and can u do mine too!! I'm reading yours right now!
    Mr. & Mrs. Horan"Will they find us?" I said fearful. "No honey... Shhhh" Niall said trying to clam me down. "I hear them coming, hide" Niall said. I ran and hide...

  • Rio.o
    4 years agoReply
    1 Like
    these scars were made for closing
    or
    these scars were made for re-opening

    whatever floats your boat
    The love of a blade.
    The love of a blad...
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    PrettyBrownEyes17
    Haha whatever floats your boat! That sounds like it hurts
  • Rio.o
    4 years agoReply
    oh my goodness. I have been here from your first chapter when you werent sure what you were doing, and im am not going anywhere. i really think you are an amazing writer and have kept me entertained for more than a year now. a true writer writes for themselves and chooses to share it to the world, so if you dont want to write, you do not owe us ANYTHING! we all understand (or should) that this is your story not ours. i hope you dad get 110% better and you dont give up on you dream, writing or not. if all else fails, know i love you to death.
    Hey Bad Boy, You're A Tad Overrated
    Hey Bad Boy, You'r...
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    Violet Bronze, Vod, is One Direction’s new stylist and she hates how full of himself Zayn Malik is. Yes, he has smoldering good looks and a moody, mysterious attitude, but Vod is not so easily impressed....
    directions loverforlife-
    U r sooo right I understand and hope others do to. I love her story. I'm also not going anywhere I want to know if her dad is OK but also the story
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