MaleMaldivesMember since 26 Mar 14Age 21Last online 5 months ago

18 Year old, loves writing and listening to music~

  • Hussein

    The Betrayal - Chapter 2 [Please give me good feedback]

    3 years agoReply
    So I published the second chapter for my book, and right now I'm looking for some serious feedback. I need to know how I'm doing so I could improve.

    Here is the link:
    The BetrayalIt's the story about Lyla, a straight A student, living the dream life of high-school. But in an unexpected turn of events, her world turns upside down,...


    Thank you in advance
  • Hussein

    The Betrayal - Chapter 2 [Please give me good feedback]

    3 years agoReply
    So I published the second chapter for my book, and right now I'm looking for some serious feedback. I need to know how I'm doing so I could improve.

    Here is the link:
    The BetrayalIt's the story about Lyla, a straight A student, living the dream life of high-school. But in an unexpected turn of events, her world turns upside down,...


    Thank you in advance
    iluv1D4eva
    3 years ago
    I really love how you don't try to introduce all the narrator's characteristics all at once. It's a really great story and I think you just need to be a little more descriptive when you are referring to other characters in the story, unless that's intentional. But keep up the good work!
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