Everything Has Changed

Two former friends with ten years that passed them by have found themselves back in each other's lives. Because all she knew that everything has changed.

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3. Harry's Outburst

It was weird the first time I had stepped into my childhood home when Harry had brought me over. At least now I can get a better grasp on the house as whole. The furniture was all new, like he had said. With my current job, I was able to work from home since I write blogs for a company. If I am told to travel somewhere, my flight and hotel expenses are fully paid.

I remembered Harry mentioning a new office. I walked down the hallway and entered the first door on the right. I stood in the entrance for what seemed like five minutes. I stepped inside the room and saw everything in the office were new items. I noticed the stacks of letters piled near the desk.

I assumed each one represented a year Harry and I haven’t spoken. It would take me at least a week or so to read them all. Guess now I had the time. I sat in the chair and reached for the first stack dated with a sticky note: July 23, 2011.

Almost 10 years ago, Harry had gone to the X Factor audition and formed One Direction. It was the days before the letter had been written that Harry and I had decided to part ways. I wasn’t sure what I would expect to read. Though I had imagined a 16-year-old Harry writing away. My hands were shaking as I opened the first envelope. Like all of them, it had my name and street address without a stamp.

July 23, 2011

Dear Angela,

You haven’t the slightest idea how hard it was for me to write this. One: I’m not used to writing letters; and two: I thought it’d seem more personal by letter than by email. You’re probably reading this now and upset that I wasn’t able to call you. I wanted to. I wanted to tell you about my plans to audition for the X Factor. I knew you would’ve supported me through my journey of hoping to become famous someday.

I don’t have any other excuses as to why I didn’t want to tell you. You might be thinking I didn’t have the guts or the courage to. You may be right. I just couldn’t look you in the eyes to tell you. Now, I’m wondering if you’ll ever forgive me. I hate that I have to be apart from you, especially if and when I’ll actually make through to being in the competition. Also, I hate that you’re moving away too. My mum told me.

You are my best friend. You are the one person I cannot replace in my life. This is a lot to say for me, especially at sixteen. I mean, I don’t think I’ve ever had feelings like this before with any girl I’ve met. You are pretty special, you know. I know how smart you are and how beautiful you’ll become. You know me so well and know that I’m telling you nothing but the truth.

I know you have the ambition to do more with your life. I know how determined you are with everything that you do. I know you’ll go on to do great things. I haven’t written a letter to a girl before, so this is all new to me. I hope that you’ll have a change of heart by the time you read this letter. I hope that in time you’ll forgive me. If you think it’s best for us to not be friends anymore, then I completely understand.

I’ll write again soon.

Much love, 

Harry Styles

I leaned back in the chair after reading the first letter. Already there were tears in my eyes. I couldn’t believe he had never sent me all of these letters. About three hours later, I finished the first stack of letters. Each one had been heartfelt and apologetic. I needed to take a break.

It was then I heard the doorbell ring, echoing throughout the house. I exited the office and answered the door. To my surprise, it was Harry. “Figured I’d find you here.” said he. “See the new office?” I wasn’t in the mood for small talk. I nodded in reply to his question.

He asked if he could come in. I stepped aside, allowing him to enter and closed the door behind him. He told me he hadn’t visited this house since I moved out. It was when he came back to London from tour that he had bought himself a place in the city. “What made you decide to leave this house for me to have?” I faced him.

I had gone over the conversation with Liam and Louis in my head while here at the house, as well as during the three hours I spent reading the first stack of letters Harry had written. Harry didn’t turn to look at me for a few minutes. I saw the look in his eyes. It was the same look he had on when I saw him before I moved to the home my parents live at now.

“I knew you missed this house. You practically grew up here in this neighborhood. You were close in proximity to my house. After you moved away to the second house, I knew that we wouldn’t be able to see each other anymore. It didn’t stop our parents from letting us attend the same schools until you moved to California.

“When you and your family moved to the States, I was still in the X Factor with the guys. Eventually we released our first album the following year and were touring around the world, including the States. I knew you were about to graduate high school when we were working on our second album.

“I was thinking about living in London someday in the future after everything has settled. My first instinct was to have a house in California because you talked about getting away from the weather here. At that time, I was dating Taylor. When she and I broke up, I had heard you were planning to move back to London to attend Uni.

“After my tour was over, I went back home and saw that the house was on the market. I bought the house and put it under my name. Taylor didn’t want to me here with me and wanted to be closer with her friends back home. She and Selena are only visiting us here before they fly back to the States.

“Since Taylor didn’t like the idea of moving here, I knew that maybe you would. I wanted to renovate the house and hopefully have you sign the deed to be the rightful owner since it is your first home. When I bought it, I visited with your parents and told them about my plan to buy their first home. They said that it was what they had wanted for you, if they hadn’t moved to their current residence. They also had said that the home was intended for us, if we had ever decided to settle down together.” Harry finished what he had said. I wasn’t sure how to react, let alone say.

I was more than surprised to hear that my parents wanted us to be together, except nothing had turned out the way we had hoped. “It didn’t work out that way, did it?”

I heard him sigh. “Ange, I didn’t come here to tell you that I regret picking Taylor over you. I came to tell you that I want us to be on good terms and be friends again.”

“You bought a house for me. My childhood home Harry. No one just spontaneously buys a house and not move in it. The fact that you bought a house for me to live in feels like you have lingering feelings for me. You have a girlfriend, who maybe visits you a few weeks at a time. How is she going to react when she finds out you did this? Where did you go the other night after dinner? After I left? Your friends seemed concerned about you.” When did it get to this point?

Harry and I having petty fights? I can hardly remember last time we had ever had one. It made sense to fight over the fact he and I parted ways without having contacted each other. He could’ve emailed, texted or called, but he didn’t. He didn’t and it hurt. “Before this place was renovated, I went up to the attic and saw that it had been left untouched. Not even the previous owners had known about the passage way to the attic. I thought they would have taken everything down.

“The appointment I had earlier was to talk with Niall. Every piece of furniture in this house was set up the way we would have wanted it. The office that you saw, I was supposed to surprise you with it when you got accepted at your job. This couch, ours. That dining set, ours. Everything in this bloody house would have ours if I hadn’t been so stupid to let you go. If I had known you would be moving back home, we would have been here in this house or maybe in California. I wouldn’t be with Taylor. I would be with you, planning a future wedding and having kids to fill the rooms.”

Harry had picked up a small vase from the foyer and smashed it on the hardwood flooring. “I didn’t like that vase anyway.” I told him. I watched him leaned against the wall and sink down to the floor. I hadn’t seen him this upset in 10 years, maybe more. I sat down next to him and reached out to touch his face.

I caressed his cheek softly and gazed into his green eyes. “Harry, buying a house isn’t going to make me be friends with you. You and I need to have a conversation about what’s really going on here.”

“What am I doing here? Why do I feel the sudden need to talk to you? I can’t even talk to Taylor the way I can talk to you.” He glanced down. I had attempted to wrap my arm around him. Instinctively, he laid down and rested his head in my lap. I ran my hands through his soft curly hair. “Can I stay here?”

“You can sleep on the couch.” I replied.

I heard him chuckle. “Deal.”

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