Confessions of a Private School Girl Entering the Real World

A diary of a private school girl's first year in the real world with real people. It's a wreck, let me just say that now, a complete and utter mess.

Contains sex, love, drugs and all things in between. Warning some people may get triggered.

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7. 26th June 2018 - 3rd July 2018

So basically I am so conflicted over everything going on and the home life hasn't been great. I have just been fighting heaps with my parents.

 

But anyway.

 

June 26th I went out for dinner with Hunter since he was leaving the country for awhile that Thursday (thought this was a blessing since despite our conversations, he has been trying to get very serious with me and clearly by what happened with B, I am not ready. I do care about him but I am not ready.) We had great conversation, I enjoy talking to him a lot and I want to continue to get to know him but he is just constantly trying to get me to become serious with him. In this situation I am like B and I hate it so much but it did give me a new perspective on the situation with B. After dinner we drove down to the river and sat overlooking the city, it was so pretty, we cuddle a bit but not much. Then two people who hate him showed up and were literally stalking us so we moved and then it started raining so we just sat undercover and talked. He got a snap from my friend Ashley which was so suspicious, she was so going to say something if I wasn't there. It was nice and he drove me home and that was that. 

 

That weekend I went back to the gay club/bar with Hugo and some old friends and had the best time ever. It was just so great to not care. Hunter said he missed me and told Hugo to take care of me. He really does care and he calls me like everyday at least once to talk and its just, its so intense.

 

On a side note, Justin keeps trying to booty call me to his apartment despite that he now realized who I am and like no?? I really want to be friends with him but like nope.

 

July 2nd I slept with my second person, Rain. I didn't exactly want it to happen because I knew I wasn't ready but at the same time I was curious and too awkward to say no. It was so different to B, he was so much more gentle and affectionate, he kissed me a lot and it was just so different and oh my gosh is he much bigger than B (B Is actually pretty small, like I dont care about size, actually the smaller the better because OUCH) so yea I am still sore as I write this. After he made me lunch and we watched TV and then we did it again. The awkward thing is he thinks he took my virginity when B did, and I wasn't about to correct him on that especially since he told me specifically not to go there with B???? Yea so two boys think they took my virginity and its crazy AF like fuck what is my life . But yea so basically that all happened and Hunter continues to try get serious with me but I keep telling him I am not ready. Ah what is life. If anyone cares I prefer having sex with B, I am just into it more and I think that is also because there is a lot of emotion there. I hate myself.

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