Him

A woman needing the pleasure of a man she can’t have.

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1. Chapter one

I’m not around him often. But when I am it excites me so much. Sometimes it bothers me being his dirty little secret but we have no option , we know it’s wrong but that’s just more of the thrill. His girlfriend can’t know. No one needs to know.sometimes I lie awake at night thinking about him. About how he plays with my hair and kisses my forehead. I think about how he feels inside me. How wet I am when he starts to rub me. I think about him deep inside of me . I always bite my lip to try stop the moaning but it never works. I might love him , he might just love me .

Every time I see him it always starts the same way, I sneak in through the back . He leads me up the stairs. He lies on his bed staring up at me . I then sit at the side of the bed and remove my shoes . I get into his bed and put my head on his chest , normally feeling like the luckiest person alive. All of my problems exit my mind . I just think about him , and what we’re doing now . I never want the moment to end . I still get butterflies when he looks down at me playing with my hair , I ask him what he’s looking at and he usually says “nothing”but smiling away at me at the same time .... makes me feel shy and so I smile and hide my face , when I’m with him my emotions go wild , love because well I love him , horny because he’s just well wow , shy because I don’t want to mess it up , on edge because It’s never 100% safe, lucky because I’m the one he’s holding tight in his arms but also sad because I know I’m lying in the bed that she’s been in , that she’s hugged him in , I’m a room away from where she sleeps , I walk up the same staircase she does everday . And all I can do is hate her ? Why ? Because she’s got the life i want. I want to wake up next to him everday, I want to be the person he looks forward to seeing when he gets in . I want to be the one who sits up with him and watches movies and just cuddle . I want to be the one he can talk to and trust and be a close friend , I’d want to be the person who makes his life really happy because I know how hard life has been so far for him . I want to be the one to comfort him and be there for him but never let him down. I want to be the person who he doesn’t want to let go of , who he doesn’t just see as any other girl ..... then I think to myself ... maybe just maybe one day ... few years from now .... I could have that , just him .... no one else . Just being happy . Having someone there who understands you and makes you feel not worthless .... just one day .

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