I stumble over my regrets and discarded clothes scattered across the floor
Tears fall for lost loved ones and the struggle for clear skin
I wonder if people look at me the way I look at myself
I hope that they don't
I spend too much time in bed yet not asleep
Wondering when I will wake up from reality
Empty smiles cover overflowing eyes
Tightening the mask that hides our shared pain
Deadlines and flat lines and dead ends
Quiet voices speaking loud words
Reminding me how much I miss the carpet of my first bedroom
More than the arms of any man
Sometimes I want to run away
Embrace a cliché to find a blank page
But running towards what’s around the corner,
My compass is set to the warmth of familiarity
The past is a horizon I shall never reach
However much my fingertips may bleed
I want to get drunk on night air, on rainclouds, on open fields
I long to wrap myself in the ocean and spiral through the waves
Purge myself of the person I am and let go
Melt and melt away
Listen to it all and fade…
Maybe one day