Can't Remember To Forget You (Harry Styles)

There's one person that can see right through the façade Chloe Hayes puts on after her life is turned around, and it's none other than her soon-to-be step brother, Harry Styles.

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21. ~Chapter Nineteen~

I stare at Harry as he sleeps peacefully next to me in my bed. It’s three in the morning, but I haven’t been able to fall asleep. My damn mind won’t shut up for one second.

Honestly, I’m still stunned at what Harry told me just a few hours before. I had no idea what he was going through, and it’s an odd feeling now that I’m able to hold most of his behavior responsible to what he experienced.

I know he’s still hurting incredibly, but I hope that now, because he’s finally told me what’s going on, that I can help him through this all. My heart is still heavy and full of emotion with the words he spoke to me… even when it was difficult for him while he was divulging his secrets, he still had the power to sweep me off my feet.

“I always think about her, wish she was still here, regret what happened… but there was one good thing that came out of this situation. . . I got to meet you. I got to fall in love with you.”

“Ever since I met you, the void in my heart has gotten smaller. You made me happy again, Chlo. You’ve helped me more than you’ll ever know.”

I smiled at the memory of his words. He loves me. And although that scares the hell out of me, I can’t deny that it’s all I’ve ever wanted. Yes, Grant loved me, or at least claimed to, and I told him I loved him back, but in hindsight, I realized what we had was never love. The feelings I had experienced with Grant were not even remotely close to what I'm feel with Harry.

That’s the problem though. I’m afraid. I’m afraid to tell him how I truly feel, even though he was confident enough to tell me how he felt. I have this terrible feeling that we’re moving to fast, and for the time being, I just want to take this day by day and work my way to telling him that I have fallen deeply for him.

“You still awake?” I startle as Harry’s raspy, sleep-filled voice pulls me from my thoughts.

“Yeah,” I smile and kiss his cheek. “Just thinking.”

“Well think tomorrow, it’s three in the morning baby.” Baby. My heart flutters every time he calls me that.

I kiss him once again and decide I should probably try to sleep. School tomorrow will be the death of me if I don’t get at least a few hours of sleep.

I snuggle into his side and allow the tiredness to sweep over me. I eventually drift off, my dreams not straying far from my reality. I can’t complain though; my reality has become something I don’t mind dreaming about.



~~~~



I ended up waking up again at six, and Harry was still sleeping. I decided to let him sleep as long as possible, because I knew the weekend was exhausting for not only myself.


I hated missing school, but I felt me and Harry needed a day to be close after everything that’s happened in the last few days. Harry’s always been important to me, but with the knowledge of his secret, I feel like we’ve moved to a whole new level in our relationship.


By the time Harry woke up, I had showered and gotten ready for the day. I didn’t know what we would do, but I was glad to spend the entire day with him and have no interruptions.

“Isn’t it Monday?” Harry asked as he rubbed his eyes, obviously confused as to why I had let him sleep so late on a day that we have school.

“Yeah, I figured you’d rather sleep in and maybe we could just spend some time together today.” I told him from across the room where I was putting my earrings in.

“You figured right.” He smiled and crossed the room to pull me into his arms. “Thank you.” He whispered and kissed me passionately.

“You’re welcome.” I told him. “So, what do you want to do? Hang out here? Go out?”

“Beach?” He suggested.

“Perfect.”


We got ready and headed to the pier to spend the day at the beach. It was hot for an October day, but I’ve always loved the sun, so I couldn’t complain.

Harry held my hand the entire drive there, and it was comforting. I was surprised when he didn’t let it go as we walked along the beach to find a spot; usually he wasn’t into the hand holding in public.

Once we found a spot, we spread out our towels and sat down. Harry wasn’t having it though; he was quick to pull me onto his lap to close the distance between us.

“I love you, Chloe.” He spoke softly into my ear after brushing the hair away.

I was so happy he felt that way, but I was still much to nervous to say it back. I was thankful he understood that, and that he wasn’t upset that I wasn’t ready to return the three words yet.

We sat for a few minutes, and I debated whether I should bring up what was said last night. In the end, my curiosity won that battle. “How are you feeling?”

He sighed and rested his chin on my head. “Better.”

“Do you want to talk about it more?” I asked.

“Not now.” Harry replied. “For one day, I don’t want to think about it. I just want it to be me and you.”

“Okay.” I agreed.

“Wanna go in?” Harry nodded toward the water.

“I don’t know… What if the dolphins eat me?” I teased as we stood up.

He took my hand and began walking toward the ocean. “I told you baby, I wouldn’t let them.”

I giggled as we made our way in the warm water. We splashed and swam around for a half hour before Harry decided he was hungry and wanted to go get lunch. My stomach agreed with him. We had skipped breakfast this morning.

“Here.” Harry wraps my towel around me and kisses me feverishly once we reach our spot on the beach.

“What was that for?” I laugh once he pulls away.

“That asshole over there was staring at your tits. You’re mine, Chloe.” He says seriously.

“Lighten up, baby.” I smile and wrap my arms around my neck. “I’m yours.” I assure him with another deep kiss.

If kissing my man distracts him from his insecurities, then I have no problem helping him out. He’s helped to distract me from thinking about my mom on the really bad days, and now it’s my turn to be there for him. It’s only then when I realize why he was so expert at distracting me—he knows exactly how I feel about losing someone close to you. Wow. We are more similar than I had ever thought.



~~~~



The week passed by quickly after Harry and I played hooky on Monday. There was a noticeable change between us, and I couldn’t decide whether I was in favor or against it.


Throughout the whole week, Harry has definitely been much more aware of the horny males in San Diego who look at every girl who has boobs like they’re going to eat her. He’s always been possessive, but this week, he has been much more vocal about it.

But the advantage to that is his excessive hand holding and kissing in public. I love it. He wants everyone to know I’m his, and I’ll gladly help him announce that to everyone.

We haven’t talked any more about his sister, even though I want him to know he can talk to me about anything. I told him that repeatedly, but I’m certain he’s still a little hesitant about that, especially since he’s been so closed off his entire life.

On Saturday morning though, I decided the change between us was starting to scare me even more than Harry telling me he loved me—which I still haven’t said back to him.

I woke up with Harry buried deep inside me, his chest pressed against mine as he holds my waist and pumps forward. My brain isn’t the only thing woken up. My body jumps to attention, and I reach up and curl my fingers into his hair, arching my back and tilting my head up to find his lips.

I let him take my mouth, our tongues dancing wildly as he thrust forwards again and again.

I can honestly say I’ve never been woken up with sex, but I think I’ll easily turn into a morning person if this is my new alarm clock.

“Chloe, I can’t get enough of you,” Harry gasps against my mouth. “Promise you’ll never leave me?”

“I won’t.” I fist my hands in his hair and yank his lips back down to mine. Will he always make me swear to stay? I’ll always comply, without hesitation, but what I really want is for him to know this without having to ask me to repeatedly swear on it.

I pull away to look at my uncertain man. He shows such confidence in everything except this. “Please believe me.” He maintains his firm, powerful drives as he looks at me, offers a small smile, then brings our mouths back together, increasing the tempo of his thrusts further.

I try hard, but I can’t keep my mouth to his when he’s thundering forward with such intensity.

“Fuck, baby. Fuck yes.”

The coil snaps and I jerk as we both yell at the same time and I moan through my orgasm. I try and catch my breath, my heart fighting to gain control and my body convulsing of its own accord. Harry swears and bucks forward one last frenzied time, and then the warm sensation of his release empties into the condom he must’ve put on while I was still sleeping.

“Shit, baby. I’ll never get enough of that.” Harry pants and falls onto the mattress. “I’ll never get enough of you. I love you so much, Chloe.”

I force a smile and let my breathing even out, trying to hide my sudden apprehension and fears.

He loves you Chloe, there’s nothing to worry about.

Shouldn’t that fact make me worry? Even if it shouldn’t, it does. And I’m scared out of my mind that we’re moving too fast.
 

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