The Apotheosis of Donkey Ollie

Donkey Ollie wants to become the most divine being in the universe, but how?

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1. So It Begins

It was a normal day in Arizona, or some shitty redneck town. Farmer John was doing the usual
of burying a recent corpse of a mailman. Farmer John finally noticed the audience and quickly
hides the shovel.

"O-oh, I didn't see you there." John straightens up. "So, have you children ever felt a
huge disdain for your enemies that you just feel like.... paining them greatly? Here, I'll
demonstrate."

Farmer John walks over to the glass table where Mr. Buddinsky laid on a clothed table blind folded.

Assorted cooking utensils and knives laid about near him. FJ puts on an apron and chef hat and picks up
a rusted knife.

"First, you make your cuts." FJ draws lines on Mr. Buddinsky's leg, which made him laugh from how ticklish the sharpie felt on his skin.

Farmer John picks up the knife and aims it at a line drawn across Mr. Buddinsky's left leg.

"Hehe.. That tickles..." FJ's best friend comments.

"Of course it does.." John rolled his eyes in annoyance. At least this little "project" would get rid of this fooker for a great eternity.

"Now, children, this project is easy as pie and should be finished before you can say-" Mr. Buddinsky removes the blindfold just then and screams after seeing the knife in John's hands.

 "A KNIIIIIIIIIIFE!" Mr. Buddinsky runs as fast as the wind as Farmer John looked distraught at losing his game that was going to be whole heartedly enjoyed on his dinner table that evening.

 "boo." FJ screamed and quickly turns around expecting Jesus to finally come and beat sense into him, but instead it was somebody much MUCH worse. It came to him after five seconds of panicking. FJ puts his hands on his hips and looks at his frenemy in an not-so-amused way.

"MR. SHIVERS!" Farmer John calls him like he always did. Mr. Shivers did his signature douchebaggish laughter as FJ throws his blood stained chef hat and apron on the table.

"Wasn't that hands on activity fun?" Mr. Shivers questions the audience. "I know you liked it as much as I did."

John looks at him all confused. "Were you watching me the whole time?"

"Pfft. Yeah. Its what I always do besides coming up with new, sadistic tortures to terrify you." Mr. Shivers gestures over to a comfy lawn chair behind a bush with a huge tin of half-full freshly made popcorn.

Farmer John glares at the audience. "Let's just see whatever the hell Ollie is up to."

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