Don't...

I don't want to hear anymore lies.
I don't want to feel guilty for something i shouldn't.
I don't want to get used anymore.
I just don't...

(Kind of a short story, advice, diary thingy, inspired by some feelings I've had lately).

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4. Don't say you love me, unless you do.

Some of the people you love, and people you think will never hurt you, they will.

One way or another this will happen. You just can't avoid it. No matter how hard you try, to the perfect friend, girlfriend, boyfriend, sister, brother, cousin, mom, dad, daughter, son... The list goes on and on. You can't be perfect all the time. As a matter of fact, you can never be perfect, because you're human. We're not supposed to be perfect. We have flaws which makes us who we are. Which makes us unique in our own way.

Hurting people unintentionally is a part of growing up. Learning about how you interact with other people. We also quickly learn that it's not a very nice feeling to get hurt by someone, and not that good of a feeling either to hurt someone, you didn't mean to hurt. You feel remorse and guilt towards the person you hurt, and learn to say sorry, and by getting hurt you learn to forgive. But there's some actions made by some people you just shouldn't forgive. These actions are of course subjective to the individual person, and colored by the circumstances of the situation, but you get the point. Some things are just so screwed up, that someone would do that, that you just can't make yourself forgive them. And sometimes is it okay, that you don't.

Sometime is it okay, even if they ask for forgiveness to say, "You know, no, I can't forgive you right now, I need some more time." And if they really wanted your forgiveness, they would respect that and patiently wait until you feel ready and at peace. 

If they, like in a lot of cases, actually don't really care about your forgiveness and just want your friendship and you guys being on "good terms" for the titles sake, then you can politely tell them to fuck off. They hurt you bad in the first place, and now can't respect that you need some time to get in the right headspace?! In these situations they a lot of the time can't see what they did wrong, or thinks it stupid that you even feel hurt by what they did/said. They don't seem to really care for your feelings or emotionel state in the situation, and are often acting out from their own selfish point of view. 

This is what most of the time is a start to a long fight between two or groups of people. This can go on for decades, past down to their next generations, and basically live on for so long, until nobody even know or remember how it all started.

 

Now you're probably thinking "How will this end then?". See, that's what up to you. What will you do? Is whatever they did to you forgiveable? Or did it actually hurt you deep down inside? Only you can answer that.

But just remember something before you take any decisions.

 

 

You deserve the best.

You are special, precious and important.

You are worth it, and need to be respected.

No matter what. <3

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