"You don't just get to come back here and pretend things haven't change." I yelled at him outside my apartment, "Things haven't changed! I still love you." he grabs me by the shoulders and shakes me gently, then clutches my face.
There is a moment of silence.
"Eight years and you still drive me fucking crazy." he smiled softly at me, and the rain is heavy, in the cliche way. Harry leans in closer to me, moving wet strands of hair from my face, and as our lips are inches apart I hear a voice.
"What the fuck is going on?" and Roman is staring right at us.


5. Part Five


Evelyn leaves just as quickly as she came. I hear my heartbeat in my ears, and the smell of the Roses perfume she always wears in lingering all over me.

I watch her not even glance back at me as she walks back inside the building. 

I never expected her to kiss me. I was expecting a slap on the wrist, and a stop-trying-to-cause-trouble eye roll.

I wanted to find her, but my need to see her again was in close competition with the want to never see her again, and forget the feeling she left me with. 

How dare she not wait for me? How could she love someone else when she would always be in love with me? Or, maybe that was just me. I waited for her under the assumption that she would always be there. 

She was the girl who I had. But, I was younger then. I wanted more than what I had and pushed the boundaries to dangerous limits, often endangering her. That wasn't love.

I followed her inside after a few moments of thought. The smell of her perfume began to fade, as the alcohol level increased. 

"Who've you been kissing?" I heard, and it was Luke who threw his arm around me. "No one, why?" I cocked my head. "Because when you disappear it's normally with a hot blonde." he shrugged, and then leaned in a little closer., "And, you've got Eve's lipstick all over your mouth," he whispered and winked at me.

"Don't say anything." I pleaded with him, and he nodded and tapped my back, and found a group of people to torment.

I wiped my lips quickly, seeing the red stain on my wrist, left me with another painful reminder. Maybe I'll get her to kiss a napkin, and ask someone to tattoo it onto my heart, then at least that part of her is in some way mine. 

I continued to wander through the crowds of people in my apartment. Picking up a beer from the table as I ventured forward. 

The sound of lips touching and talking is all around me. 

I step outside on to the balcony, only to find Roman sitting there. 

"Hey." he turned to me, and then looked out at the sky again. "Hey." I sighed and rolled my eyes, that of all the fucking people at this party, he is the one I am left here with to complain about this girl with.

"Have you seen, Ade?" Roman asked me, "Not for about half hour." I walked closer and leaned against the stone balcony. 

"Maybe she's being wild." Roman offered me a forced smile, which I returned. 

"So, how did you two meet?" I asked him, and he turned to face me entirely. 

"My dad, he owns the company she works at. I was doing the rounds for him one day, and there she was," he explained, "She likes to think he isn't my dad, and that she just has a way with her bosses boss, but she doesn't. Only me." 

It didn't beat our story.

"Cute." I muffle into my beer, and he nods slowly. 

I notice a light pink color on his neck, and the shade of lipstick is not the same as the color of Evelyn's lipstick that still resides on my lip. 

"You seem to have been having fun." I point to his neck, and he quickly repositions his shirt to hide it. "Well, let's keep my fun between us." he pats me on the back.

"So, tell me some history. You and Ade, what did you used to get up too?" Roman diverts the subject, which tells me he is guilty. 

He is only guilty because he did not love the girl who he kissed. 

I would declare that Evelyn is innocent until my dying breath, as no mistake was made. It was love.

"We used to sneak out a lot. Ade has this place, she used to make me take her there all the time. It was where her dad used to take her when she was younger, you know, before the accident. We'd just sit in my car, and pull the roof back, take a couple of blankets. Then you wouldn't see us for weeks. 

We drove a lot. Thousand miles a week, at least. We never got anywhere, but we were always going somewhere. 

I swear to god she was just always so happy, despite life's cards, she just wanted to live. I mean, we must have traveled in circles, but that was enough for her. All she wanted was see everything once, and if she liked it, we'd do it again, and she always liked it. 

Rosehill didn't have a lot for her, but it's home. That's why she is still here, but she was destined for such great things. Have you heard her poetry? The words she uses like; remedancy, kairos and numinous, somehow all have a special meaning with her. 

We went to a lot of bars. It didn't matter as long as it had good music, she'd stand over at the jukebox all night, and play the same three songs. All eighties and all bad, but she loved it. Everyone loved her too, the energy was electric when she was there.

We were together every day for almost eight years. Not a day goes by that I don't think about the last two years and regret not seeing her sooner. Life isn't as good when she isn't in it, remember that." I tell him, and he looks a little shell shocked.

"You really know her, huh?" Roman asked me looking down into her drink, "Better than anyone else, or so I like to think." I shrugged softly.

"What is the deal with her and Luke?" Roman asked me, as a friend would ask a friend. "Isn't that something you should ask her?" I asked him back, and he shrugged. 

"Sometimes it's like she has had this whole other life, and I know nothing about it." He frowned softly, "Her and Luke messed around a lot together. Ade use to date this guy, he didn't really treat her how she should have been treated. So, Luke was her go to for no strings attached." I explained, giving out as little information as possible.

"Who was the guy?" Roman moved a little closer to me, as if we were teenage girls telling boy stories, "Some nobody. He took off a few years ago, left her with nothing." I explain to him, and he sighs deeply. 

"So, she fucked that guy?" Roman's jaw was tightly shut and everything was silent for a moment. "I hate the thought of another guys hands on her, you know?" he crushed the beer can in his hand.

I knew the feeling. It was the thought of his hands on her that made me uncomfortably angry. 

"It's cool that you care about her so much." Roman told me, and I was praying anything but the nice guy routine, because then i'd start to feel guilty about kissing his girl friend.

"Yeah, I do care about her. So, if you fuck up, or don't give her the attention she deserves, or even look at another girl, from this point on. I'll fucking end you." I lean in closer to him, and he smirks. 

"You almost care about her as much as I do." Roman commented, I quickly shake my head, "More." I whispered, and turned my back. 

"Enjoy the party, Roman. Look for Luke," I pause and smirk to myself, "Where Luke is, Ade will probably follow." I tease him, and he tells me to fuck off, but there is a smile behind it. 

The night is still young and I try and watch Evelyn's every move. I watch her dance in her ripped Jean's with Luke. I can look past his hands on her body, but Roman can't, he is seething. Roman doesn't like her like that. 

But, I do. Fuck. I do.

The way she is moving with Cherry Vodka in her system, makes me wild. Watching her, be watched by everyone and knowing that she was only here for me, made me even wilder. I knew she wasn't here with me, but for me, that was enough. 

Whilst I am watching her, I almost forget to see how Roman is looking at her. 

He is temporarily looking at her like she is best thing in the universe, then that look changes and alters to another girl, who is dancing with Evelyn. Now, he's looking at her. No words can capture the way he looked at the other girl. 

I imagine how Evelyn would feel to know that Roman would never look at her like that. I imagine that she walks over and slaps him for staring at the red-hair, and tells him to get out, and then she takes me, and then she fucks me. 

But, she doesn't. 

Drunk and oblivious. Evelyn dances like no eyes in the room are watching her. 

Then I look at how she is looking at Roman.

Evelyn looks at him and smiles, she doesn't catch his gaze. The red-head has trapped it. But, Eve sees his eyes messing with the girl, and trying to undress her. And yes, she still looks at him how she used to look at me. 

It get's late, and the people endlessly leave my apartment. 

Until I find Evelyn lay on my sofa. 

There is smoke in the room, trash all over the floor, and it reeks of beer. But, she balances it all. 

I sit beside her and watch her for  a few moments, before softly shaking her out of her slumber. "Hey, Evie." I mutter to her, and she clasp's my hand that rests on her cheek. 

"Hey." she moans softly, "Where's Roman?" I asked her softly. 

"I lost him. I saw him grab a taxi with a red-head." she mutters to me, "Oh." is all I can say. 

"Don't worry, it happens any time we go out." Eve speaks as she sits up, "What?" I remain close to her. "Roman doesn't come home with me." she speaks so sadly. 

"He's a bigger jerk than I was." I tell her and she nods slowly, "I guess I do have a type." she smiles up at me, her eyes glazed, she's still drunk.

"Do you want me to take you home?" I offered, and she shook her head again, "Can I stay with you?" she asked me sweetly, and I whispered Always. 

I picked her sleepy body up, and cradled her in my arms and walked through my apartment with her. She wasn't quite asleep, but she was struggling to control her body, alcohol always did that too her. 

"Do you need a hand getting changed?" I offered, brushing her hair from her face, and she nodded limply, standing before me, lifting her arms for me.

I removed her shirt, her black silk bra was in stark contrast to her milky flesh. Her tattoo's had faded, and some of them had been removed. Had she hated the memories we had made that much?

I watch her fumble with her jeans, but she eventually tugs them down. I sit her down on the edge of the bed, and let her step into a pair of my boxer shorts. I watch her unclip her bra, and ever part of me is dying to look, but she'd kill me in the morning. 

So, I turn. I hand her one of my shirts for her to leave the body perfume all over. 

"Done." she mutters, and I smile down to see her lying in my bed, the white sheets seem to remember her body. Eve's body is lying there fragile and begging for me. 

"Are you coming?" she petted the bed, and I sat down beside her. 

"You know if I get into bed with you, you're going to hate me in the morning. You'll say I took advantage." I tell her, and she shakes her head, "I am asking you to get into bed with me." she pleads. 

"No. Because, you'll not only hate me, you'll hate yourself for cheating on Roman." I stand away from her, "I would love to climb into that bed with you and fuck you, but something about the timing is off." I finished.

But, I flick my head to see her and she is lying down again with her eyes closed. 

Asleep, and hopefully dreaming of me.






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