The accidential Hacker

Harriet is a struggling painter.. One day she accidentially hacks into someone computer and it turns her whole life upside down

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11. Fears and bad news

 

 *Harri POV*

 After having eaten a bit, I start missing Zac and looking for distraction, I head for my atalie, starting to paint, letting my mind wander, which turns out not being such a good idea.

 It had been such a wonderful evening, night and morning and I could still feel the soreness when I moved, but how could I believe that a man like him would want anything but a fling with me ?

 He is so amazing, so handsome, so utterly perfect in every way and I am just little old boring me, with paint on her face, who gets way to snarky at times, I am not good enough for him.

 Just as I am about to sink further down into my self-pity, I decide to go make myself a cup of tea, I only have just sat down at the kitchen table when my phone ring.

 I see the name on the display and pick up the phone. "Well good day there captain, missing me so much already you just have to see me ?"

"Sorry darling I'm having a full on day. Mike has really piled it on today! How are you ?" Zac's voice sounds on the other end.

 I sigh, I could really use a hug from him right now. "Better for talking to you. Just having a break and a cup of tea. No problem, I just see you tomorrow or when you have time."

"I was hoping to take you out again tonight but I have a dinner. You're welcome to join me, but it's with Robert Downey Jr and Tom Hiddleston so photographers will be everywhere." He sighed.

"I'll pass thanks, I'm happy with my anonymity for now. You don't have to see me every night, Zac!" I don't want to come of as needy.

"I don't have to, but I want to. Every night, every morning, and every minute in between if I could." He paused and continued quietly. "I have to go back to Canada Saturday."

 I push away the dread, already, I am not sure I am ready to be without him already. "I know. I've known t all along that you would leave soo . We still have a few days. I'll see you tomorrow".

"Can I call you when I get home tonight ?" He asks softly.

"Of course." I say with a smile. "Oh, I have to go, my sister Liz is calling. I'll talk to you

tonight."

 I switch calls. "How's my favourite big sister?"

"Harriet ? It's Jake." I hear her husbond Jakes voice, I always really liked Jake, he is a good guy. Him and my sister lives in New York.

 I get a sinking feeling, my sister is pregnant, they have been trying for two years and are so happy. "Oh god Jake what's wrong?'"

Jake could only talk long enough to tell me that Lizzie had lost the baby and was

going straight to surgery. I remembered she was supposed to have an important scan yesterday, and Jake told me that the baby hadn't had a heartbeat. He handed the phone to my mum, who was already there. "Mum is she going to be OK? Do I need to come ?"

"No sweetheart, she will be fine. Devastated, of course. But she will be OK. The doctor said sometimes this just happens. I'm sure she will call you as soon as she's up to it". My mum says.

"I wish I could be there." I say softly.

"I know you do. I'll give her your love as soon as she wakes up. And I'll call you if there's any news." My mum tells me.

"Thanks mum. Love you. AII of you". I hang up the phone and tears sting my eyes.

 It made me think of the past, I don't really know why, but I think of my high school sweetheart, he was the reason I hadn't dated anyone in a while, I found him in bed with one of my friends, if he couldn't stay with me, why would someone like Zac ? No I am nothing but a fling to him, a week of fun before he leaves for Canada and forgets me. 

 No my sister is the one who needs me, and she is on the other side of the country, and I can do nothing from here. Seconds later I find myself online looking for a plane out to New York tomorrow, booking a ticket.

 At 9pm my stomach rumbles. I hadn't had dinner but the thought of eating turned my stomach and I decided that I preferre to be hungry.

 Once again I found myself thinking about Zac, and the amazing night we had last night. I don't think I had imagined the feelings, mine or his. It certainly had felt real. I have only given myself to Dean before, there hadn't been anyone in between. 

That would explain why I fell so easily for Zac's charm. Not that no one else has tried, I just never let them get that close. The betrayal of having another woman practically live in your house wasn't something I would ever forget. And it isn't going to happen to me again. No I better get out while time is, before I get to invested, before I set myself up to get to hurt.

 I decide to call my best friend Kerry in Paris, she picks up on the second ring, her voice sounding happy. "Hey Harri, how's it going?"

"I don't know!" I hadn't meant to snap. I am just so drained from the afternoon that I brake down and then had to explain everything.

"I'm so sorry Harri, I understand, I'm sorry so you and Lizzie. Can I change the subject?" She asks, and I know she want's me to think of something else.

"It's ok, I'm a bit on edge. And yes, please do. It's good to talk to someone." I haven't talked to her for a while, mostly short messages, and a call to tell her about Zac of course.

"How's Zac?" She asks me, and I know she is impatiently tabbing her fingers.

I groan. "Impossibly perfect, charming, and leaving for Canada on the weekend anyway." I say with a sigh, knowing she is going to see right through me.

"Oh so you're beating him to the punch?" She asks me blatantly.

 I hadn't thought about it like that. "No. I'm just re-thinking my decision. I need to get to Lizzie."

"Harri". She said gently. "Please don't hang up on me. But you can't do anything for your sister, please don't use it as an excuse to push Zac away. I know you are scared, but I am sure he is nothing like Dean. So please call him, have a talk, tell him about your fears".

"He's out, he's busy. And I need to pack." I say, feeling myself choke up.

"Sweetie, I'm only telling you so you don't make a mistake. I have never spoken to him, but from everything you have told I am willing to make you a bet, If he's not in love with you I will eat my own

shoes. He is not just having fun with you before he goes. I know you miss your family, and if you need to go you should but please just visit and then come back, don't use it to push him away Harri".

I can barely speak. My mind is racing, everything I'd convinced myself of today had just been turned on its head.

"Thank you Kerry".

"You're welcome. Are vou OK?"

"I think... I will be. I think maybe I'll wait until I talk to Lizzie." I say, taking a deep breath.

"Good. Nothing wrong with a calculated decision".  I smile as she says that. Kerry didn't know any other way.

"Harri, just call him. I'm sure he won't mind."

"OK. I should go."

"If you want to talk, call me back, OK? Call Zac and get some sleep.'"

She hung up. I was reeling. I had been ready to run, to the other side of the country. Where it was easy, where I didn't have to deal with these feelings.

I send a message to Lizzie, asking her to think about if she wants me to come. I know she will immediately say no, but I hope if she think about it she will tell me if she need support. I send the same message to Jake.

I pour a glass of wine, and snuggled into the couch, turning on the TV.. I am not ready to call Zac, and he will be calling me when he is free anyway.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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