The story focuses on three families. The Kinnear's, The Millsap's, and the Owen's. All different. They live very different lifestyles. Albert Kinnear the Librarian, who's parents came from Swindon but live in Pinetree Gardens, his father Jack is an engineer. He is a keen gardener and Pigeon fancier. Albert meets the daughter of Charlie and Elizabeth Millsap. They live on Kenton Road, in a bought property. He also is a pigeon man who has wangled his way into a chairman's job. he is a welder down the docks. No one is good enough for their daughter and they resent the relationship between Laura and Albert. Then there is William Owen(Willick) a roofing builder who lives in Cedarwood Avenue with two son's and a daughter. Alan is a jack the lad; he will sleep with any woman given the chance. Harry the youngest is a joiner and the brains in the family. Evelyn his daughter is twenty five and her father is pushing her to meet a man and get married so he can have grandchildren.


78. 78

“Whey come on,’ they speak wi a gob full of marbles and wave their arms about like a bunch of bloody fairies. That bloody Charles looks like a proper poufda an aal.’

“All the girls like him.’ He’s the most eligible Batchelor in the world.’

“Would you marry him Evelyn?’

“Aye for his money.’

“What and have to bow and curtsey to those lot, you must be worse than mad.’

“That princess Ann has got teeth like a bloody horse an aal said Alan.’

“Don’t you be calling Princess Ann, she does a lot for charity she does: said his mother.’

“Someone ought to donate a new set of teeth to her then.’

“Shut up will yer I’ve missed all the speech now.’

“It’ll be on again when the bloody news comes on.’

“Who’s going to pull a cracker wi me?’

“I’ll pull one wi yer dad said Alan.’

“Eat yer dinner and shut up Alan; diven’t start your father off. Yer na what he’s like when he gets beer doon his neck?’

Willie ceremoniously lifted the cheek of his arse up from his seat as the Queen waffled on about her army and people living abroad and farted loudly.’ This brought tears of laughter from Alan and Harry.’

“You dorty bugger Willie Owen, you could have left the table to do it. “Oh it bloody stinks an aal.’

“It’ll be them sprouts, yer na they repeat on me.’

You wouldn’t catch any of the Royal family farting at the table.’

 “Give over, whey aye she does, just cos’ she’s the bloody Queen of England doesn’t mean she doesn’t fart.’

“They have been brought up with more manners than you have, you filthy pig.’

“Give over woman, do you think when she’s in that glass carriage pulled by those horses that she doesn’t let rip.’

“No she doesn’t.’

“Whey aye they do,’ and Phillip an aal, why do you think they wave all the time. It’s to waft the smell away.’

“Will you stop talking about farting when we are eating our dinner?’ You are putting me off.’

“Nowt would put you off, not even the Gerry’s during the war dropping bombs put you off.’

Yer still ate a ha’peth of fish and chips.’

“That was then, this is now.’

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