i will always be watching

Hi, my name is Jane Willison, and... this is the diary of my geeky life, and... oh, don't read this is your name is Rocky or Stewart, and either way, I don't want you reading this, cause... this is a diary. Okay, bye!

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3. page 3

 Dear lovely diary,
​Are you proud of me? I know it's not much, but 'lovely' is all I could really think of. It doesn't mean I am popular though. It just means I care more about this diary. It was a gift from my grandmother. She was the only one who said I was the most popular girl in the world. I wasn't sure of it, but I thought I saw her wince every time she said that.
​There is a lot of girls who are popular who have blonde hair and braces, like Becky or Sherry. But they're more beautiful, because their parents let them wear makeup and adult clothes and stuff. I cant wear no more than lip gloss and my parents take my clothes rate to TV-Y, like Sweaters or sweat clothes and stuff like that. If they wore what I did and they didn't wear makeup, I would have twins all over the whole United States.
​Today Mrs. Klair "babysat" me while Paula went to Jakes. I put quotation marks over the word Babysat because Mrs. Klair isn't really much of a... movement type of person. She just sits in the wheelchair she will probably die in and stares off into the farest corner of our house. Lucky for me she never talks so I can tell her the most deepest most darkest secrets anyone can ever tell.

 

 "Hey, Klair," I said. "Guess what? Paula has anorexia because she thinks that's a fat girls name. Do you think so, Klair? And I think I ruined our only class assignment so I guess nothings that bad right now" and the only thing Klair did was blink twice. I guess that was a signal of shock. "and I know I am not supposed to spy on Paulina but I think Jake hits her because there are always red fingerprints on her neck and scratches on her chest. I try to ask her to talk about it but she just tells me to shut up and grabs a glass of wine and a pack of cigarettes and goes out back." It felt safe for me to talk to Klair like that, but I felt like a kid. Suddenly an idea popped into my head. What if I dressed age appropriate instead of under-aged appropriate while mom and dad's gone? I didn't want to break their rules, but they are gone. It wouldn't hurt for them to not know. Paula doesn't care about anything, really. Gotta go, diary. I need to go to Paula's clothes.

 

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