The Pain of Love

A lost, broken girl. Her life is shattered into pieces, her heart broken with some missing pieces. A popular, kind boy, he has everything anyone ever dreamt of. What happens when they collide? Will he be the one putting the shattered pieces together and mend the broken heart as well as go and find the missing pieces? Or will he be the one walking away, leaving her more broken than ever? A book of love, heartbreaks, and tears.
They say, leave your past the past, move on and maybe forget about it.

What happens when it comes back to haunt you?

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1. Blood and Cuts

I stood before the mirror, looking at my reflection. I reached into the drawer and pulled out the small razor blade, I pulled up my sleeve and look at my arms, tears streaming down my face as the blade come in contact with my bare skin. I looked down on my arm as blood made it way to my wrist and drop into the sink. I stare at it as a droplet of tear fell into the cut, the pain starts to escape and spread throughout my arm. I opened the tap and placed the bloodied blade under the cold water, I took the brown towel next to me and soaked it, putting it on the cut. My eyes start to sting, my chest starts to burn, and the arm which the cut is on starts to tremble.

" It's ok, it's ok" I whispered to myself.

I watched as the blood went through the dark fabric, I lifted the towel, and it was stained with blood. However, the cut is no longer bleeding, but there was a straight line across my arm. I looked at myself in the mirror again as I took a deep breath and walked outside, turning the light off and closing the door behind me. I'm now back in my bedroom; I made my way to the bed, I sat down and pulled my knees closer to my chest, hugging it. I put my forehead down and sobbed quietly so no one could hear,

" You did this to me; I hate you! " I said to myself, gasping for breath between sobs.

I whipped away my tears with my sleeve as I stood up and went to my drawer. I looked through it and found a bandage, large enough to cover the cut. Walking away from the drawer as I opened the door to the balcony and walked out. I rested my arms on the cold metal as I take in the view. I closed my eyes as I listened to the soft wind rustling the leaves, Spring is here, and school will start soon, I don't know if I'm glad or not. I walked back into my room, closing the door and head out of my room. I walked downstairs folding my arms. I made my way into the kitchen as a familiar figure stood in front of me smiling,

" Hey sis, how are you?" Amanda, my little sister, said

" I'm good " I replied tilting my head to one side, smiling

" Well, I'm heading to the shops, wanna come?" She asked, looking at me and then lower her eyes down to the bandage

" Sure, " I said, turning around, walking towards the door, grabbing my coat hanging on the hooker along the way.

As I was about to open the door, I heard someone running downstairs.

" Hey, where are you guys going? " My big brother, Jake asked

" The shops " Amanda replied bluntly

" While you're there, get me some shaving cream and some snacks, thanks! " He said before running upstairs again

" Maybe and stop running up and down the stairs Jake, you're not a three years old! " Amanda shouted upstairs before we went outside.

She turned and locked the door before walking away.I caught up with her, and she smiled at me, she looked down at the bandage and asked me

" Autumn, have you been doing it again? "

" What are you talking about?" I asked, I knew what she meant, I just... don't want her to know

" You know what I'm talking about. Don't play dumb; I'm younger than you by one year, I know when you are lying or when something is wrong for goodness sake, tell me! " She said, raising her eyebrows

" Ok... maybe," I said, hesitantly

She looked at me with a worried face before pulling me into a warm hug

" You have, haven't you?Stop it, Autumn! Stop hurting yourself! Stop being so sad and distant all the time, I care about you, and I'm worried, not just me, mom, dad and Jake are too! We're here to help you, let us in, we care ok? " She said before looking up at me again

" Ok..." I said quietly, but loud enough for her to hear

We care? We worry? Mum, dad, Jake, and Amanda, they worry? I asked myself. As much as I want to believe her words, I can't, one person in this family, the one I trust the most, I love the most ruined my life, changed my life forever... I'm scarred for life! I try to forget the memory, but I can't, not this one, not now, not ever.

I tried hard not to let the tears fall, but nothing helped, it was flowing down my cheeks before I realize. I turned my head and looked at the houses, so Amanda won't see me crying. I thought of what happened in the past and asked myself; How could I ever forgive such thing? How could I ever forget? Most of all, how could I ever move on?...

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