Broken Walls

Sometimes we surround walls to keep ourselves safe especially when we are afraid of getting hurt. But sometimes all we need is just for someone to break those walls and save us.

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5. Chapter Five

Damien P.O.V

I had enough. Just enough. Enough. No more. Enough of me just sitting there, being lazy crying buckets full of tears, and acting all the time depressed. It was no good. I mean, if I just sit here at home and cry. Jess was not going to come back. I had to do something, and fast. I stand up, and walk out of the house. I was going to look for my beloved Jess. I had to find her. Someone as pretty as her, does not just disappear. I had to find her. I needed her. I see a man who appears to be in his mid thirties with a brown beard, and a long angular face, with a pointy nose walking down the streets a pram in his hand. Maybe, this man could know where my beloved Jess was. I mean someone had to have seen my beloved soul mate Jess, maybe this man might have. The man was singing a nursery rhyme to his baby. I walked to him, and watched him look at me.

 

“Excuse me, young sir have you seen my beloved girl friend Jess, she has pretty blonde hair, beautiful twinkling brown eyes, a radiating smile, and she is about my age?” I ask, hope filling my voice.

I was so desperate. Desperation filled me. Oh Jess. I miss her so much. . One day, I will find you Jess, and we will be together forever, and nothing. I mean nothing could break us apart, we would be like those couples that always kissed, and held hands, and were always love struck, and in a love mood. Oh my beautiful beloved soul mates Jess! I miss you so much. Will we ever be together my soul mate? I really do hope so my beloved soul mates Jess. I love you so much, oh so much. I had never felt like this in love. Normally I was just ordinary Damien Black. A cute and adorable heart breaker, who flirted with girls, and broke their petty fragile heart. But I had changed now. I was truly and madly in love with Jess. I knew she just had to be my soul mates. I know it sounds dumb. I mean who would expect heart throb flirt Damien Black to fall in love. But I had, and I was heads over heels in love with her. I missed her so much. I yearned for her with desperation, and awaited the day to see her beautiful divine face, and hold her in my arms, and never let her go. I wanted to protect Jess, like a mother bird protecting her young. Even though Jess, said she was strong and really brave. I knew that inside she was not. Jess was pretty, sweet, kind, caring but most of all delicate. She was delicate like a flower. So precious, so beautiful, so fragile. So independent. Jess always wanted to be the strong one. She always wanted to be independent, wild, and crazy which is one of the reasons I fell in love with her. Her independence, her wild and crazy said her sweet but delicate nature. It all made me want to protect her, even more than usual, and I had to protect her. No matter what.

 

I remembered when one time I had hurt her. I had hurt my beloved soul mate Jess.

 

"Jess." I begin to say, placing my hand on her wrist; I had to talk to her. I had to make her understand me. I loved her more than anything, and I desperately needed her, she was what kept me breathing. I loved Jess, so much and needed her desperately, desperation filled me..

"Let me go!" Jess shouts, tears falling from her eyes, as she tried to look away from me in anger..

"Jess I'm sorry, and I know sorry isn't good enough to forgive me, but I really love you Jess, and I really don't want you to hate me." I apologize.

"I'm." Jess begins to say.

I place my finger at her lip, and then bring her closer to me; I whisper sweet nothings at her. I don't want her to hate me too, Jess is my life.

"I love you Jess!" I exclaim.

"What!" Jess exclaims.

"I love you Jess, I know I've screw up, but I don't want you to hate me too. After all I know I messed up, and I am so sorry. It was an accident. Just an accident, I would never mean that to happen. You know I think of Kayla as my sister nothing more, nothing less. I am so sorry. Please forgive me. You mean the whole world to me Jess, and I love you so much" I whisper.

"I do not want." Jess begins to say.

"I know you have every right to hate me, but what happened was an accident, I love you Jess, I always screw up, but I don't want to screw my love for you away, you can slap me Jess, kick me, but please forgive me. I love you Jess, please forgive me. I will die here if you do not. Oh Jess! What have I done? I have hurt you and Alex so much, and I am extremely sorry. Please forgive me. I know now how much you mean to me. You mean my whole world, and without you I am incomplete. You make me smile Jess, you make me cry. But most of all you make me feel loved. You love me more than anybody else, you make me feel loved. Even with hundreds of adoring fans who love me madly and are literally quite crazy or with the boys who I love so much as they are like my brothers to me, or my family who I love and cherish. It is you who I need when I am sad. It is you when I am happy. It is you who I want to be with every day, and not be afraid of what the world will give me. I want you to hold me, I want to love you, and I want to protect you. I want to love you so much. You are my soul mate. You Jess. I had never felt like this with anyone. I love you Jess, so much, and I can’t let you go. I need you Jess. I love you so much Jess, without you I am incomplete. I would die for you, I love you Jess, please take me back." I cry, collapsing on the floor, and hold her legs, feeling so desperate and pleading.

"Damien don't cry, I love you too!" Jess exclaims, holding me tightly.

"Really, you mean the world to me Jess; you’re the best thing that's happened to me. I don" I mumble.

"Me too Damien, I forgive you, your my love after all." Jess whispers kissing me. I hold her tightly, wiping the single tear, which falls from her eyes.

"I will never let a single tear, fall ever again." I promise, and I mean it.

That day I told her I would never let a single tear fall, and now my beloved soul mate Jess is crying wherever she is. I told her I would protect her, and I failed her.

 

It was my fault! I felt like it was my entire fault. My fault, that my beloved Jess got kidnapped. My fault that she is missing and my fault that someone had kidnapped her. If Jess got hurt, I could never live with that guilt. I should have been there to protect Jess. I should have been there. But I was not. Jess said she could get there, that she was independent. But I should have said no, and go and pick her up. I should have protected her more. Maybe if I had. My beloved soul mate Jess would still be with us, and not kidnapped. But I knew that was silly. It was really ridiculous that I thought it was my fault. I knew that was what my beloved soul mate Jess would have said. She would have told me that it was not my fault. That I can’t protect her always, and that it was just fate. It was fate that she had to get kidnapped, and even if it was not today. She maybe would have still been kidnapped sooner or later. But I can’t shake the feeling, or nightmare that it was my fault, and maybe if I had protected her more, and looked after her more. Jess would still be here with me, where she belonged. She would not be wherever she is, alone and kidnapped by a horrible frightening monster. I mean who could kidnap my beloved soul mate Jess. Jess was kind, sweet, pretty, independent, lovely. But most of all my beloved soul mate, who I loved to pieces and would do anything to get back. I wipe a tear that trickles down my cheek. I had to stay strong, for Jess. I knew Jess was alive. She just had to be, if not I would kill myself, and I was seriously not kidding. I would do anything for Jess, kill anyone or kill myself. Jess, meant the whole world to me, and she just had to be safe.

“I’m sorry sir, but I have not seen anyone on that description, but she sounds beautiful. Wait, are you not the Damien Black of the popular band Brighten Up. My wife loves you, she obsesses over you. Like she knows what tattoos you have and where, and would seriously do anything for you, like even leave me. Sometimes I really do wonder what you have that I do not. Well maybe you are more handsome, have a better voice than me, and are more richer and popular. Wait, I understand now. Well, I got to go. I really hope you find your beloved soul mate very soon.” The man tells me politely.

I look at the baby in the push chair. It is a sweet adorable baby girl with black hair, and brown eyes, who gurgles at me loudly, then sticks her tongue at me happily, enjoying mocking me. I try and not to find that his wife knows where all my tattoos are, but just shrug it away. I mean, nearly all my fans would do, and if I found that weird. I would find what else they know about me even weirder. Strange, how the man knows it is my beloved soul mate. I am looking for. I smile kindly.

“Thanks anyway.” I reply, going to look for my beloved soul mate Jess.

Suddenly I see someone who looks so familiar to her. I run to her, and then smile radiantly when I notice it is her. But she looks a little different. Her blonde hair now has pink high lights which emphasize her beautiful hair, and the clothes she wears are different. For example she is wearing a light blue dress, with a pale green cardigan on top which emphasizes her curves. But I know it is still my Jess. She was still my beautiful beloved Jess. Always beautiful, striking, warm and lovely as usual. But my face falls, and I look confused when I noticed a one year old toddler, on the pale pink push chair she pushes. The toddler has beautiful red hair, and green eyes, with freckles scattered over his cute, chubby face.

“Jess!” I exclaim in delight, hugging Jess tightly.

“Let go. I do not know you. Help!” Jess yelps in fear and terror, shrugging out of my grasp, and then inches away in fear.

“Jess my beautiful sweet heart. It is me your beloved soul mate Damien!” I exclaimed feeling confused.

Why didn’t my beloved soul mate Jess know me? What had happened over these two years, and who was this child.

“I am not your Jess. I am Miranda Grey, and this is my beautiful baby boy Alex, and my husband Will. Is coming any moment right now.” Jess or Miranda says.

“No you are not Miranda Grey. You are my Jess, and I love you so much.” I tell Jess or Miranda.

What was going on? I was feeling very confused. Something was going on, and I was becoming very confused.

“I am not Jess. I am Miranda, and I do not know and love you.” Jess or Miranda says.

She does not love me. She does not know me. She does not love me. She never loved me. No. This was not my Jess. Something was going on, and I hated it. Why my beloved soul would mate Jess, say her name was Miranda, and pretend she has a son. Something was happening, and I knew it was bad. Suddenly a red haired guy walks to Jess or Miranda, and hugs her tightly, wrapping his arm around her like a poisonous snake, with eyes that were filled with venom. Who was he? Why did he hug my beloved soul mate Jess like that? Why did she not resist? What was going on?

“See Mr Damien, this is my husband Will. Will, this man here Damien he said his name was said my name was Jess, and that we were beloved soul mates. Tell him that I am Miranda, and married to you.” Miranda or Jess tells Will, urging him on.

“Exactly what she said. Man, I do not know what your problem is. But she is Miranda, and we are married, and we are in love, and this baby boy here is our son.” Will explains clearly, stating the facts.

“Exactly. Now please go away.” Miranda or Jess says, looking at me with terror and fear.

Looking at me with terror at fear. It should be this guy she should be looking at with terror and fear. Jess should not let this man touch her. Something was wrong here. I did not believe that even for a second that my beloved soul mate Jess, was his soul mate or wife Miranda Grey.

“But. Jess.” I say, pleading with desperation, touching Jess hand.

“Let me go!” Jess or Miranda said with fear.

“I think the lady told you to get lost, let her go.” Will tells me, shoving me back, shoving me into the cold menacing wind.

I shiver in the cold. How could Jess reject me? Why now? I loved her, she was my beloved soul mate, and I loved her so much. I take out the wedding ring from my pocket. It was silver, with beautiful diamonds it was my grandmother’s, and I was going to give it to Jess, asking for her to marriage. But now that never will be. Tears trickle down my cheek, as I sob hard, feeling so much pain and anger. What was going on? Why to me? Why to Jess? Why was Jess saying she was Miranda? Just what really was going on. Suddenly I feel something hit my head, and my world goes black.

 

Kayla P.O.V

 

I run faster, closing my eyes from all the couples and their fancy love. Suddenly I bump into someone hard, landing hard on the floor painfully. I open my eyes, to see a cute curly haired boy; he looks at me then gives me his hand. I ignore his hand and get up by myself. I rub my throbbing elbow, grazed and bruised purple, rubbing it painfully. My eyes met the boy's, and I suddenly felt like I had seen him before. Suddenly an image flashes back to me.

"Are you ok? I am so sorry, I didn't see you" the boy cries out inspecting my elbow worryingly. I look at him thinking he's lying, but he looks genuinely upset. Is this Damien, the same Damien who was my best friend, but had to move school because of my mum job? It was hard leaving Damien, a mistake. I realized now the biggest mistake of my life.

"I'm Fine, just a bruise and it was my fault, I was running closed eyes" I explained.

"Why? May I ask" the curly haired boy inquired.

"Getting away from all the couples smooching everywhere, god, so where's your girlfriend?" I asked checking him.

I felt a tingly feeling, like I was flying in cloud nine.  He looked about 18 and looked quite fit, the curly brown hair making him look like a cute child.

"I haven't got one, I'm single" the boy murmured anxious embarrassed blushing red. I smile, I didn't know boys blush, and he looks really cute blushing.

"Really I mean a really hot guy like you, would have millions of girls falling for you" I exclaimed then realized what I said.

"None of the girls here are my type, all so girly, I'd like a girl more like you" Damien replied back. I blushed like a beetroot then gazed into his warm brown eyes. I felt a ting of excitement, he made me felt different.

"Happy Valentine’s Day by the way, I'm Damien Black" the curly haired boy introduced handing me a lollipop.

"Happy Valentine’s Day, you too I'm Kayla but call me Kay-Kay, all my friends do" I mumbled embarrassed.

"Kay-Kay, a gorgeous name for a gorgeous girl" Damien flirted I breathed in scent of his perfume.

"I have not really got anything" I whispered back taking the lollipop.

"I" Damien began to say in an intoxicating voice.

"Think" I continued, gazing at him with love.

"I" Damien whispered, hand in hand, face to face.

"Love" I exclaimed, coming closer to him, till I was standing right in front of him.

"You" we chorused, gripping tightly into each other’s hands. Then realizing we were like the other couple, how funny is this world?

Damien hugged me tightly, I felt safe in his arms, like nothing could hurt me. I felt loved and wanted to stay in his arms forever. I watched the tree's dance in the wind; other couples looked at us happily then back at their partner, their eyes all dreamy, focused on each other. I shivered in the cold, for early February it was cold. Damien took off his blue jacket and put it on me. I put it on; it smelled of Damien, so intoxicating, like under a spell. Suddenly we inched closer for a kiss, I closed my eyes. Then I felt something cold on my face, I opened my eyes to see Damien running away. I wiped the snow off my face, and then began running toward Damien, he looked at me cheekily, and then continued running.

"I'll get you Black" I yelled, picking a massive snowball and throwing it at Damien. I watched it splat on his curly brown hair.

"You did not do that" he shouted picking me up and throwing me on a blanket of snow, as I shivered in the cold.

He lay on top of me. I heard his heart beat fast, he panted deeply.

"Say you love me" Damien exclaimed acting angrily, brushing a strand of my long brown hair.

"No" I groaned watching his eyes look at me hungrily.

"Say you love me" Damien repeated, trying to kiss me, inching his face closer to mine, by cocking his head to the left, and inspecting my beautiful face, and smiling with joy and love. 

"I love" I began to say, and felt Damien inching toward me.

Then pushed Damien onto the snow, watching him land on the snow.

"Snowballs" I yelled running, glancing back to see him running toward me.

"Kayla, come back here" he shouted.

Suddenly I looked back to see a dark blue car, speeding fast toward Damien.

"Damien" I screamed in horror loudly, turning back.

I wake up, drenched in the rain, my hair all wet. Why did I think about Damien, not Alex, and why such a horrible nightmare. My heart pounds rapidly, making me feel nauseous and in fear. Why did I have such a horrible nightmare? Why about Damien? Was Damien in danger? Was something bad happening or happened to him? My heart ached. I loved Damien. He was like my brother, and one of the closest people to me after Alex, Jayden and Jess, and I thought he was really sweet, kind, caring, very nice guy and, also he was a perfect dad to Jayden my son, and Jayden loved him to pieces, and really looked up to him, and adored him a lot. Just like, Jayden enjoyed both having Alex and Damien as a father figure, and they both adored him and spent a lot of time with him, which I loved. I stood up, and started looking around for Damien. Just where was he? I suddenly had a bad feeling that something bad had happened to Damien. I knew that wherever Jess was, she would tell me to look after Damien, and keep him safe. But she did not need to tell me that, for me to do it. Damien had been really sad, especially these last few months. He blamed himself for Jess disappearance. This was not really fair, and not true. It was not Damien fault that Jess was missing. We all missed her. I really missed Jess. She was like a sister to me, and I really missed her loads. But I could not stop what I was doing, and let it destroy my life, because that was not fair. To all the others, who would look at me, and expect me to be strong. But also because, I knew that Jess would return very soon and that she would be fine, and then this would be nothing but a bad nightmare, and we would all be happy together forever. I walked out of the room, my eyes searching for Damien.

“Damien! Damien!” I called out, repeating it loudly, looking for Damien.

Alex walked in, and looked at my distressed face, and ran up to me, and then hugged me tight.

“What is it Kayla? Why are you looking for Damien?” Alex asked, question after question curiously.

“Where is he?” I asked, desperate for the answer, just where was he.

“He left a few hours ago. I have phoned him, but he has not answered yet, but I am sure that he is fine.” Alex told me trying to make me reassured, by rubbing my back kindly.

“No. Something happened. I had a horrible nightmare about Damien. Something has happened to Damien. Something bad and I am really afraid Alex. Look for Damien. Call the boys, something bad has happened to him, and I am really scared Alex.” I told Alex, holding his arm for support, trying not to break down into tears.

“Do not worry Kayla. Damien is strong, and a fighter. I am sure nothing bad has happened to him, but just for you to feel less afraid. I will call the boys. Just do not get afraid, or scared Kayla. Please be strong. I love you.” Alex told me, ringing the boys.

Suddenly Jayden walked in, he looked at my distressed face with tears trickling down my cheek, and then Alex looking worried.

“What is going on mummy and daddy?” Jayden asked, looking curiously, reminding me so much of Damien, and then running to me.

He really did look so much like Damien now, it was cute. You could tell between Damien and him that they were father and soon, it was adorable. I picked Jayden up, and held him tightly, playing with his curls, his cute dimples flashed when he smiled just like Damien’s.

“Daddy Damien is missing.” Alex admitted, looking grief stricken, and holding my hand.

We had to be strong together, as a family. Exceptionally now, we can’t break down. Together we are strong.

“Oh no! That is really bad mummy, poor daddy Damien. But I am sure he is going to be okay mummy. Do not cry mummy.” Jayden told me confidently with reassurance, wiping the tears that trickled down my face, and smiled at me with hope, and faith, his dimples flashed, reminding me so much of Damien.

“Mummy is not crying. Mummy is sure Daddy Damien is perfectly fine.” I lie to myself, forcing a smile on my lips.

I had to be strong, exceptionally now. I already lost Jess. I can’t lose Damien too, why did God take away all the people who meant so much to me? But I was fine that they both were fine, and soon they both would return to us, to our family. Where they belonged, and then we all would be fine, and we would live happily together forever.

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