Soft Spot

❝Because when you think everything is going right, things always have to make their turns just to mess everything up.❞


A story in which the sarcastic bitch collides with the egocentric asshole.

A story in which even the ones you hold dear to your heart could be the ones to stab you as soon as you have your back turned.

A story of trust and loyalty - follow Arvina Erikson's journey as she discovers the trials and tribulations of young love with Zander Maz, the guy that would teach her what it really means to fall in love, and to open up again even after you've had your trust broken.


This story may contain vulgar language and mature content.
© 2017 | Aeanne. // peachienixie. | All Rights Reserved.


9. {8}


Arvina Erikson


As I walked away from Zander and out of the study hall, I realized that I've managed to destroy another opportunity to kiss hom, and I seriously wanted to kick my ass for that. I don't understand why I kept doing this, but he makes me so nervous that I push him away when I want quite the opposite because I want him so close to me; closer than one could ever imagine.

The breeze brushed hair out of my face as I walked to the football field, the sun placing warm kisses on my skin. I tugged on the sleeves of my cardigan, crossing my arms and huffing a heavy breath out. I was frustrated with everything I was feeling because I couldn't explain what I feel for Zander. I wanted him, but I knew that it was bad to want him, especially with the little warning he's given me when I confronted him about his bad behavior.

It's like I was contradicting what I told Brielle about guys like him - guys with that hotshot-wannabe-too-good-for-the-world attitude, and suddenly, I understood why she liked that most about Luca. They pull you in, and before you know it, you're in too deep. You fall for the gooey eyes, the flip of the hair, the teasing. And when you fall, there's no way to dig yourself out of the hole - you're fucked. I'm fucked.

There were no words to explain this, if there was even anything that needed to be explained. It's simple: good girl meets bad boy, good girl falls for bad boy, bad boy is too good to be true. I can see now why this was a bad idea.

Taking the risk could yearn beautiful results. We could fall in love and everything would be a magical fairy tale. We'd smile and laugh and do stupid couple-y things like kiss and cuddle while we Netflix binge. Or everything everything could fall apart. We'd realize that this was all too good to be true and it wasn't magical from the beginning. We'd be filled with crying and screaming and cursing each other.

And who even said anything about love, anyway? Lust, maybe. Lust because Zander Maz is attractive and anyone with eyes would realize that. Lust because I know deep at the back of my mind that this is probably nothing to him more than a fragile little girl that could be easy to toyed with - and he's right, and I hated that he's right.

I've always met boys and fallen for them instantly, without paying attention to the consequences, and even when I do, I ignore them because I'm blinded with the emotions, and before I realize it, I'm crying myself to sleep and promising that I'm never going to fall for anyone ever again because all they ever do is leave my heart with cuts and bruises.

Growing up, I was jealous of Brielle. She liked boys, and she got the boys she liked, and they stayed with her until she was the one that got tired of them following her around. Except for Joshua, I suppose. She was deep in love with him, and she was so heartbroken after the breakup, she called me at five in the morning, completely silent except for her sobbing and I just knew that something was definitely wrong.

I sighed deeply once again, sitting on one of the bleachers, staring at the big ball of brightness in  the sky with my finger shielding my eyes. I laid down on the bleachers, closing my eyes and letting the warmth of the sun take all of the frustration that I was feeling away.

I took a water bottle from my bag and drunk water, placing the bottle on the bleacher below me without paying any attention when I knocked the bottle down when I laid down again. I heard it roll down the bleachers, but I was so tired that I decided to deal with it before I leave the field later on.

Until it apparently hit someone, as I heard a loud 'Ow!' echo through the field. I jumped up, frantic and awfully sorry for whoever it hit. I looked down to see who it hit, seeing two brown eyes look up at me in confusion. Of course it would be Chris of all people.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, jogging towards me with my water bottle.

"I just wanted to rest for a bit." I shrugged, obtaining the bottle from him. "What are you doing here?"

"I didn't wanna be in the study hall," he shrugged too, "and I figured the field would be empty."

"Am I ruining your bubble for you?"

"You're good."

He sat beside me and we were quiet for awhile, staring off at the field. The field's grass had always been the greenest part of Woodrose Secondary, and when there are no football games or obnoxious football players practicing, it was the most peaceful and quietest part of the school. Dandelions have grown on the sides of the field, lightly being blown by the breeze. The atmosphere smelled like freshly mowed grass, and though a lot of people find the smell rather ugly, it has always represented calmness and serenity to me. Our breaths were synchronized with each other, his eyes squinting at the sun above us, long, tanned arms stretched on the bleacher we were sitting on.  I remembered having a massive crush on Chris when we were younger, but being too afraid to jeopardize our friendship. I remember feeling my heart break every time he came to me for an advice whenever someone else broke his. I remember feeling my heart break even more when he suddenly decided to disappear on Brielle and I. But as we sat here, the calmness surrounding us, all of that seemed like nothing but a distant memory, and I couldn't help but wonder if I, too, was nothing but a distant memory to him.

"You know," he spoke, breaking the silence and making me look at him, "I missed you. Really. We were so close."

"You just stopped talking to me." I frowned. "You walked away from Brielle and I and disappeared like you were some sort of a ghost."

"Maybe I was." He laughed, shaking his head and messing up his hair with his long fingers. God. I remember being so in loved with that laugh - the laugh that left me ranting to Brielle on the phone at four o'clock in the morning because 'Jesus, Brielle, why couldn't he be mine?'.

"Why though?" I turned to look at him, criss-crossing my legs on the bleacher. "I want to know." And I did. When he suddenly decided not to speak to me for two months, when he decided he was too good to be our friend anymore, I was so heartbroken that I didn't want to show up to school, wondering that maybe if I didn't, he'd be worried and check on me. However, after earning a painful smack on the back of my head by Brielle, I decided that the plan wasn't foolproof and maybe he wouldn't notice at all.

"I just." He sighed. "I had things that I needed to figure out. My parents were getting a divorce, and I was at risk for not making it into the swim team because the coach was Alizia's dad. You were my friend. Alizia didn't like you. You know."

"Alizia told you to stop talking to me or she'd tell her father not to recruit you for the team?" I frowned. If I didn't hate Alizia before, I certainly hate her now.

"Yeah. It was selfish, but being on the team was all that I had. I would never have a bond with my dad anymore after they get a divorce and I don't make it into the team. You know how big of a fan he is of Woodrose Secondary's swim team. I had to make it. I had to make him proud one more time before he completely walks out of my life."

I felt selfish for ever being angry at him. Instead of checking on him, to make sure everything was okay because it's not Chris to just walk out on someone without any explanations, I spent hours on the phone with Brielle, cursing him out for being such an asshole, when I was really just upset that he wouldn't cooperate in fulfilling my fantasies.

"Chris." I bit my bottom lip. "I'm sorry. You should have told me, I would have understand."

"That was the thing," he said, "I couldn't. If Alizia caught me talking to you, telling you that it was her plan, I sure would have never made it." He looked at me, the same brown eyes I loved growing up filled with guilt. "So I wanted to be liked by Coach Greene. I wanted to be good enough, to be sure that whatever Alizia say or do wouldn't impact my swimming career. And then I was going back to you and Brielle."

"Why didn't you?" I frowned. "Chris, we missed you so much."

"Because when I was sure I wasn't going to hurt my career, it was too late. How could you get closure from someone you decided to just ignore after four years? There was no room to catch up. And then I saw the two of you with Joshua, and I thought that maybe you just didn't really need me anymore."

"That's silly." I smiled at him. "We're doing it now, aren't we? We're catching up."

"Yeah." He smiled back. "I guess I just didn't have the balls. Thank God you decided to throw your water bottle at me."

"I didn't!" I gasped. "It was an accident."

"Yeah, sure. I'm sure you did that to make sure I pay for all the years I was out of your life." He smirked teasingly, taking my water bottle and drinking from it.

"Hey, that's mine!" I snatched it from him, making him spill water all over his shirt. He looked at me with wide eyes, standing up as if he was going to attack me. So I ran. And I ran and ran and ran.

I was hoping that he'd chase me, and he did. We ran across the field, laughing and pretending that the gap years that we didn't talk to each other were nothing but distant memories. And maybe they were. Maybe we can find a way to forget how much of a bitch Alizia Greene is and pretend that we stayed best friends, just like we were before entering Woodrose Secondary.


"Where did you go after you escaped from me in the study hall?" Zander asked, buckling his seat belt.

He texted me during the seventh hour, asking if I needed a ride home considering the situation between Joshua and Brielle aren't pretty. Joshua didn't even really bother to pick us up this morning, which is understandable. And because I was too lazy to walk home, and I know that Brielle has to stay after school for art club anyway, I told him that it would be greatly appreciated if he could give me a ride home.

"I was at the football field." I said, buckling mine. "I was catching up with an old friend."

"Old friend? Or an ex-boyfriend?" He smirked, but I could tell that his demeanor was serious.

"Please." I rolled my eyes. "I'd never, in a million years, date a Woodrose Secondary boy."

"I could change that." He winked and drove away from the school right after.

We didn't talk much on the way home, both silently appreciating my choice of music. He handed me the AUX cord upon sitting on the passenger seat, telling me that I was in charged of the music. I decided that I could never go wrong with Arctic Monkeys, so I scrolled through my Arctic Monkeys playlist and started us off with Baby, I'm Yours, my favorite. He told me that he actually also really liked Arctic Monkeys, sparking another thing that we could bond over. We talked a little bit about our favorite Arctic Monkeys songs, and he told me that his favorite was R U Mine, and how it was Edward who first showed him the band. I couldn't imagine him and Edward listening to bands like Arctic Monkeys, but I decided that I really do know little to nothing about the jock army, and that the perceptions that Brielle and I have had about them could be the most wrong things in the world, especially because I couldn't imagine them singing for an old lady to make her feel better either.

"So where are you taking me?" I asked, looking out of the window.

"You'll see." He smiled when I looked at him.

We didn't say anything else after that. He kept driving, and when he reached my house, he kissed my cheek and told me to dress fancy and that he'd have Gaston - whoever that is - pick me up at eight. I wanted to ask why he couldn't pick me up himself, but I knew that he'd find some way to dodge this question, or tell me to just be patient because 'I'll see', so I just smiled at him and thanked him for giving me a ride home before leaving his car and running to my room to get ready for ballet.


I texted Brielle to cover for me tonight and took a shower as soon as I got home from ballet. I put on a low-cut black cocktail dress and curled my hair as much as possible, as it's much harder to curl it now that it's a whole lot shorter than before. I snatched my strapped, round toe black pumps from my wardrobe and put a pair of silver earrings on. I tried to keep my make-up as neutral and nude as possible, a look that says 'I tried, but not too hard'. I looked at myself in the mirror and when I was contented that I looked pretty damn hot, I kissed my dad goodbye and told him and my older brother, Nash, that I'd be with Brielle tonight - a lie that I have told more than I should.

As soon as I closed my front door, I saw a black limousine parked in front of my house with an old man wearing a tuxedo. He smiled as soon as he saw me, opening the back door and waiting for me to get in.

"Good evening, Ms. Erikson." He had a very posh accent. "My name is Gaston, it's nice to meet you."

So this is Gaston.

"Hi, please, it's Arvina." I smiled at him. "It's nice to meet you too."

He helped me inside, where Zander was sitting with a very smug smile. He was wearing a black suit and tie, his hair slicked back nicely. He smelled like an expensive cologne, and he was holding a bouquet of a dozen fresh roses lined in a gold ribbon.

"You look beautiful." He whispered as soon as I was seated, handing me the bouquet.

"You don't look bad yourself." I smiled back at him, feeling all of the butterflies in my stomach go wild. I took the bouquet from him and smelled the freshness of the flowers, silently dying at the fact that no one has ever done anything like this for me before.

He nodded at Gaston, who was now sitting on the driver's seat, and I felt the car start moving. Zander kept his eyes on me, and I'd be lying if I said that I could take my eyes off him too. He looked so gorgeous, and not at all like the tired jock that I saw the time that I confronted him for ignoring me.

Gaston turned on the radio and the song I Wanna Be Yours by Arctic Monkeys started playing. Zander smirked teasingly at me and winked, making me laugh and shake my head at him.

He  took my hand in his and I felt our fingers fit perfectly together once again, making shivers crawl up my spine. He pulled me closer to him, his hands letting go of mine. I almost let out a sad whimper until I felt him place his hand on my back.

The closeness that the car had given us made goosebumps rise on my skin. He looked at me as if I was the most precious thing in the world, making me feel weak on my knees. My breath hitched as I stared back at the guy in front of me who was giving me such a loving look. He drew small circles on my back, smiling endearingly at me.

I wondered if he's done this to every girl that he's been with, or if I was lucky enough to share this kind of moment with him. I knew that the latter was an almost impossible truth, making my heart sink, but I decided to ignore it. I don't know whether I was just obsessing over the haze of the moment again, or if I was really feeling what I'm feeling. Maybe I liked Zander more than I intended to, and I wanted to know whether he felt the same or this was just a simple little game to him that he wanted to play just because he could. I wanted to know how far all of this would go. How far all of the lingering looks, the butterflies, the spellbinding smiles would go. How long would they last? For a really long time, I hoped.

"You know what I can't stand?" He whispered into my ear, his breath tickling my neck.

"What?" I managed to choke out despite the tightening knot in my stomach.

"You're not mine." He pecked my neck, pulling me closer to him, and the explosion of the feelings it gave me made me want to scream. "And I want you to be."

"I could be." I closed my eyes when his lips came in contact with my skin. "I could be." I repeated when he pressed another kiss.

He pulled away and looked at me to smile, kissing my forehead. Concern flooded his eyes, and I couldn't help but wonder what was going through his head. What was with the sudden change of emotions?

Before I could even begin to ask, Gaston parked the car and Zander came out to open the door for me and help me out. I saw that we were at Clos Axis, an expensive and highly-romantic restaurant at London. Also known as mine and Brielle's dream date place.

It was a wood paneled restaurant, decorated in beautiful forest forest of white blossoms that seem to go forever as they reflected on the restaurant's mirrors. The place was studded with fairy lights, candles, and a fireplace that adds to the 'We will make out under the stars after this date' vibe.

Zander informed a lady on the podium that he had a reservation for two, and she led us upstairs, where the restaurant overlooked the beautiful city of London. We were seated by the tall glass window, the stars twinkling at us and the beautiful city lights awing both of us.

We were served red wine and scallop and king prawn tortellini for starters, then they handed us each a menu where we would browse for our main course and possibly a dessert later on. I looked at the prices of the menu, almost choking at how expensive everything really was.

"What do you want to eat?" He asked me without taking his eye off the menu. "I think I like the sound of the Scottish Halibut in sea lettuce butter."

"I don't know, Zan." I bit my bottom lip. "Everything's so expensive."

"You're not allowed to look at the prices!" He frowned jokingly at me. "You're my date, let me treat you."

"Oh, really? I thought this was just a hang out?" I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Just order," he chuckled, "I would if you don't."

"I'd actually like if you did." I said, closing the menu. "I really don't know what to get, this is kinda overwhelming."

He just shrugged and called the waitress over. He got his Scottish Halibut and ordered 'Flame Grilled Line Caught Cornish Mackerel, Spanish Octopus & Prawn' for me in a very fake posh accent, making both the waitress and I laugh. He just winked at me and then ordered lemon sorbet for both of us as dessert.

"I can't get over how beautiful you look." He complimented me as soon as the waitress left to get our orders.

"Thanks, I tried." I joked before taking a sip of my wine.

"I'm serious." He laughed as he took a bite of his tortellini. "I mean, you always look beautiful, but still."

"What's this all about?" I played with my plate of tortellini with a fork to avoid looking at him.

"What's that supposed mean?"

"Just, what is this?" I looked up at him. "Why are we here? What was wit the 'I want you to be mine' in the limo? I want to know."

"We're hanging out." He shrugged. "That's what I told you earlier, right?"

"No." I shook my head. "You don't take someone on a fancy place because you want to hang out with them. You take them to the movies then get something off the value menu at McDonald's when the movie is finished."

He laughed, as if what I was saying was funny at all. "I just want to spend time with you, is that bad?"

"But why? I'm sure there are other girls out there you'd much rather spend all this time and money on."

"I chose you, didn't I? I don't want to be with any other girl. I want to be with you."

"Is this your way of trying to get into my pants?"

"No. Why would you even think that?"

I shrugged. I didn't know why I even said that, and I didn't know what else to say to him, so I just started eating my tortellini.

"Arvi." He cleared his throat, and before I could correct him, he continued what he was going to say. "I've never done this for anyone. You probably don't believe me, but trust me that there's nothing behind this date. I want to spend time with you because it's you that I want."

"You hardly know me." I sipped my wine again.

"Which is why I'm spending time with you," he said patiently, "I want to get to know you more."

"This all just seem too good to be true."

"Why do you think that?"

"I don't know. It just does."

Our food then came, and we didn't speak for awhile. I was enjoying whatever it was that he ordered for me - the fish was tender and the octopus actually tasted pretty good. He seemed to enjoy his too as he moaned as soon as he took the first bite, making me shake my head and laugh. He just smiled at me and continued eating. When we were both halfway done with our food, he started talking again.

"Do you not trust me?" He asked, seriousness covering his face.

"Trust you with?" I frowned.

"With you," he looked outside the window then looked at me again, "I like you, Arvina, so much."

"I like you too." I admitted, and a weight felt like it has been lifted off my shoulder.

I like him too. I did. I really did. In such a short amount of time, this egocentric asshole managed to make me have such a big crush on him, taking me by surprise and completely ruining the promise that I've made myself that I would not fall for anyone fast anymore.

But who could help it, anyway? Zander Maz is gorgeous, no doubt about that. And this kind of 'I will take you on a date and kiss your neck in the limousine' thing could easily make any other girl fall for him. I wasn't sure whether I was filled with doubt because of my experience with the jock army, or because I had my heart broken way too much to even begin to trust anyone with it again, and yet Zander managed to take it within the past few days that I've known him. It was incredible but terrifying at the same time.

We finished our food and left the restaurant, deciding to walk around the city for awhile before calling Gaston to pick us up. We walked hand in hand, talking about each other's pasts again. We told stories that made each other laugh, and it was like that until his older brother was brought up.

"Cal was my best friend," he said, "I was heartbroken when he passed away."

"What happened?" I asked, hoping that it wasn't too invasive as this subject made him look like he was about to burst into tears right there and then.

"He died in a crash," he bit his bottom lip in an attempt to prevent the tears from falling, "he was driving his drunk best friend home, and it was raining hard, and-"

"Zan, we don't have to talk about this if you don't feel comfortable." I said.

"Thanks." He smiled at me, and we continued walking.

We told more stories and laughed more and walked more. When my feet started hurting from walking, Zander decided that we've had enough and dialed Gaston, but his call went straight to voicemail. I told him to keep trying, but after the fifth call, we both gave up.

He told me that his sister had a penthouse in the city, so we decided to rest there for awhile until Gaston calls him back. We walked to the penthouse, which was only a few streets away from where we were. He had texted his sister, and let her know of the circumstances.

To say that the penthouse was beautiful was an understatement. The main room had a big glass window that overlooked the city, much like the one at Clos Axis. From here, I could see the Big Ben in plain sight. There was a beautiful chandelier dangling on the ceiling, crested with diamonds and rubies, and a grand piano placed by the stairs.

Zander took my hand and led me on a reclining leather couch in front of a remote controlled fireplace, turning it on and letting me cuddle next to him as he reclines the couch. He took my heels off and threw them off somewhere, kissing the top of my head and letting me rest my legs across his lap. He held me in his arms, playing with the short strands of my hair.

"Did you really mean it when you said you liked me too?" He asked quietly.

"Mhm," I nodded, "and I hate you for making me like you so much already."

"I do have that effect on people." I pictured him with a smug smile. "I wish you could be mine."

"All you have to do is ask." I looked up at him.

"I can't." He pressed his lips together, looking down at me.

"Why not?" I frowned.

"I'm leaving."


"Tomorrow." He sat up, and so did I. He looked me in the eyes and I could feel my heart shatter into pieces. "I'm going to Paris tomorrow."

"For how long?" I asked, trying not to sound upset.

"I don't know." He shrugged, taking my hand into his and letting them fit together like perfect puzzle pieces for what could be the last time. "I have to do some things for my dad. He owns a company and he wants me to manage the branch at Paris while he rests as his health is starting to deteriorate from all of the stress."

"But what about school?" I frowned, desperate to find reasons for him to stay here, with me. "You still have to go to school."

"I'm continuing my studies there," he whispered, "my dad's really sick and no one else could take his place but me. Mum's gotta manage the one at Russia, and my sister's too busy planning her damn wedding to even really care with what's going on."

"I'm sorry, Zan." I bit my lip, squeezing his hand.

"Me too." He whispered before pulling me close to him again. "I  wanted to spend one last time with you."

"Is this what this was all about?"

"Yes," he kissed the top of my head again, "it is."

"Maybe we shouldn't leave." I looked up at him. "Maybe we should spend the night here. Forget everything else for now, you know? Enjoy each other's company until you have to leave."

"I like that very much." He smiled before placing a kiss on my forehead.

I didn't like that he was leaving after making me fall for him, but he had his responsibilities, and who was I to protest against that? I'm terribly sad about the fact that he was leaving me after we've created a special bond, but I knew that it was just another crush that I'd get over as soon as he was gone and I found someone new. I was thankful for the short amount of time that we spent together, and I know deep in my heart that I'm going to cherish this for a very long time.

So maybe all of the lingering looks, the butterflies, and the spellbinding smiles are not going to last as long as I'd hoped they would, but I was grateful that I had the chance to meet Zander Maz, even if our turn together was way shorter than what I could ever hope for.

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