When will it come?

In here i will talk about the past and the present maybe about the evil that i have done and the price of that.. if you want or like to hear about these things please.. sit down and read what i have to say.

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2. The beginning.. 17 of April

 A feeling of dread has fallen on me.. it's taking a big while to get used to this.

 

 Feels like the Reaper is here or.. the end of something it's making me wonder if it was worth it because my body feels like it's dying faster and faster every single day that passes my body is also looking a bit more lifeless than yesterday and my body feels like it's revolting against me (looks like there's a mutiny on board hehehee)

 

 Today has been filled with emotions and events even though I didn't leave my home and I have decided to go with it all and not revert the contract.

 

 A friend of mine told me to try to revert it but I will not do it.. there's much to gain and little to lose besides.. it will be fun to play around with a new and stronger body

 

what I feel today... the anxiety and feeling of dread, out of breath, a strange "tightness" in my legs and arms, an abnormal heartbeat and more tired than usual but strangely enough I also feel closer to my true self and to the being that I made a contract with which is.. weird because I haven't been communicating at all with the being oh well I'll leave it at that.

 

And also I've been thinking about what to do after all of this

should I go to Colorado and be with my vampire friend and start it all over?

or should I stay in Portugal continue my life and make some changes in everything?

and if it doesn't work (if my death is permanent) should I order a coffin and maybe a few black and red roses?

 

 Tell me.. which one of the 3 choices presented in here would you prefer?.. (using your power to change some things in your country.. starting your life all over again or dying)

 These 3 paths will be decided by fate and what is decided will leave it's own mark.

 

 You.. have seen today's heart and mind.. the emotions and thoughts that flowed today

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