Survive the night

I'm Ethan. I had a great life. A lot of friends by my side and playing rugby on our school team. But that's gone now. Something's changed.


2. The night

True I'm getting better, but it feels like I'm better only around her. It's like everything she does is for nothing, because at the end of the day I feel miserable anyway. The only reason for this is the night. Night time is like this black shadow that you can't escape because it's everywhere. It doesn't want to hurt you. It just gives space for thoughts. That's why it's dangerous, and hard to ignore it calling for you to share your feelings. I may sound like a psychopath that's planning to do something horrible. (I won't mention what. You can use your imagination.). I don't know what will happen tomorrow, but I know for sure that I'll...

“Hey Ethan.”

Whoaaa, who are you?” I said with clear uneasiness in my voice. Seriously I was expecting really bad things in my future, but getting murdered by a creep in the middle of the night outclasses each one of my scenarios.

It's me Rachel.” My sister seriously said it with the calmest voice that exist and I thought I was going to murder her at that moment. I hit the switch on the lamp faster than anyone ever did and looked at her with an angry facial expression, but once I saw her face I softened.

What are you doing here? What happened?” I asked the most caring voice I could let out of my throat. She looked as if she's seen something terrible. People would describe it with the ghost phrase, but I think it was something way worse. A tear escaped her right eye and was slowly streaming down her cheek. I quickly got out of my bed and ran towards her. She jumped on me and hugged me tight and started sobbing like mad. I carried her to the bed, put her down and sat next to her. Once I sat down she grabbed my shirt and tugged on it with her hands formed into fists by now. I turned to her so that I was facing her. She looked so vulnerable I started to get angry to whoever did this to her. I finally started comforting her and noticed that she's all sweaty. So it was a bad dream. This fact kinda calmed me down. Maybe it's because no one actually hurt her that I felt relieved. It took a while for her to calm down, but once she did I didn't say anything, because she might start crying again. We just sat there in silence, looking out of the window. After about half an hour she finally spoke up.

“I had a bad dream. It was so realistic I thought it was really happening.”she said with another tear coming down her cheek. She wasn't going to cry. It was just a reaction to a bad memory

“So what was that dream about?”I asked with a now slightly worried expression. I felt like it was something she couldn't even imagine and if it happened in real life, God knows how she would react.

It was about me getting kidnapped and raped. A-after that they dumped me completely naked on some field.As soon as she said it I was frozen and my eyes started to water at the thought of it. I hugged her tight and started crying on her shoulder.

“Why are you crying Thanpants? Come on it's not reality.” It looked like tables turned rapidly. She was comforting me, because I was crying like a baby and couldn't stop.

Why are you so calm? Aren't you the one that believes that dream may come true?

Yeah, but you're the one who's hurting now, so I'm going to worry about that later.she said with a small smile on her lips. I stopped crying and got into a big brother mode.

“Why are you like this? You're all bossy in front of your friends, but with me you're the best person ever.”

“I have to be like that. For yours and mine sake. They wouldn't leave you and me alone if both of us were the weird ones. You were pretty popular when you were playing rugby. That's why they were pretending not to see the 'weird' things you did, but once you quit it changed. I know you had a hard time your freshmen year, and I don't know why you quit, but I'm sure you'll tell me when you're ready.” she said it while looking down at her lap. I felt like I was the most idiotic person in the world. Was I that blind? She was just trying to help.

“I think you can go back to normal. I mean...go back to being okay with yourself. You shouldn't change because society tells you that otherwise you can't be accepted. You must want it for yourself, not for the society. You're really gifted Thandoodle.” she said while grinning at me

“Stop calling me that, you know I hate that nickname.” I said even though it's not true. I like when she calls me that, but only she can call me that and I mean it. She's like the only person I trust.

“I'll try to get back into the team, but you know it's hard with my depression and anxiety.” I promised while taking her hand and kissing it. I started to feel drops, probably tears, fall on my head and a pair of hands hug my torso.

“You know, the last time you did this was two years ago. Does this mean you're coming back?”

“So are these tears of joy or should I grab something to eat.” I asked jokingly. Of course she hit my arm and started laughing. I was kinda ashamed that I was only thinking about myself for two long years, while my sister tried to keep me above the surface. They say that love, support and caring can't cure anything, and I believe it, but I'm sure it can make you better or even lead you to the right path.

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