Drinks on Friday

The local cafe is home to the local LGBTQ meeting group, and the starting point for their crazy weekly nights out. Meet Rage, the leader, a transsexual working on becoming transgender, Love, the lovely transsexual and the most manly of the group, Nat and Patty the lesbian couple in a semi-open-closed relationship, depending on the day, and Sky, the extremely feminine straight man, who was raised to be gay until the day his heterosexuality burst out for none but himself to see.

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Joe's tongue licked at the small line of cappuccino froth that lined his top lip. The clicking of his nails on the coffee table was quiet but regular. His eyes rolled as he caught sight of the flashing digits on his watch. 17:45.

"Where is everyone today?" asked Barney, the cafe's owner.

"I don't know, Barney. Pain in the arse, I'm always waiting for them."

His fingers curled around the handle of the coffee cup, lifting it to his mouth, just as the door burst open and an odour of strawberry lipgloss and flowery hand cream floated in.

"Joe, baby, I'm sorry I'm late, I had such a horrible day."

A long, thin hand with pink nails landed on Joe's shoulder. A thick puckered set of lips crashed into his cheek, and the other hand thrust back a set of curly, blond locks. Joe's eyes wondered over the tall, lanky body thrust into tight blue jeans and a pink t-shirt with "I love pink pussy, cats" printed on the front.

"Oh my God, so you know I told you that a new guy moved in next door? Well, he was fucking someone, not me of course, all night. All night. Can you believe that? Well, needless to say I couldn't sleep a wink. What with that and the body of this gorgeous girl I saw yesterday whirling around my mind, I'm exhausted. And I think I drank too much coffee today. Is twelve cups too much? I'm not even sure anymore. Anyways, how are you? You're the first here again? Anyone would think you had nothing better to do."

"Hi Sky, nice to see you too."

"Oh my God, so I broke a nail today, just as I was chatting to this hot chick who came into the store. So embarrassing. I had to run out back and literally cry for five minutes until Carl the darling bought me a nail file. Honestly, I thought I was going to die."

"Jesus, Sky, how are you not gay?"

"Why the fuck do you ask me that every time we meet, Joe? God, I told you, when I was a kid, I was so feminine, my Mum assumed I would be gay and raised me as little drama queen, beauty pageants and all. And then at thirteen, I had a dream about fucking one of the

girls who runs down the street with huge swinging tits and boom, pop goes the weasel. And the next morning Sky's cleaning clumps of white spoof off his pyjamas and wondering what the hell is going on in that strange little mind if his."

"That's disgusting, and a little bit disturbing."

"It's ok baby, you're not my type."

"So you've never actually been with a guy?"

"Of course not. I'm totally straight. With a curved exterior, as my mother says."

The door banged again. Joe and Sky looked up as Nat and Patty walk in.

"Evening, boys. What's new?" asked Nat, her short hair sticking straight up in green spikes, a bolt of metal through one nostril, and long blue overalls covering her whole body. Her lipstick free lips splashed kisses on the two boys' cheeks.

"Patty, Nat, so lovely of you to finally turn up. Okay, so boy do I have a story for you."

"Sky, come on, we just got here. Let us order a coffee at least before you push your 'Oh my God' stories on us again."

"Fine, whatever. Bitch." Sky's eyes fell and focused in on his long, pink nails.

Patty's hand unconsciously ran over his leg, fingers squeezing.

"And how are you, Joe?" asked Nat.

"Fine thanks, Nat. You and Patty doing alright?"

"Good good. Can't complain. Patty, will you please get your hands off Sky. You know I don't like that."

Patty's hand retreated back to her tiny pocket.

"Sorry babe, just couldn't help myself."

The door slammed open again and the four faces turned to look at the tall brunette who stood there. A long smile spread across Rage's lips.

"How you doing, Ladies? Ready for today's LGBTQ meeting?"

"We sure are Rage!," shouted Sky.

"Sky, you're straight, you're none of those things, what are you even doing here," said Patty.

"Do we have to go over this again? I feel like a gay man trapped in a straight man's body. Anyway, you guys are my best friends, how could I not come?"

"Fine. Sit down everyone," said Rage. "So we're still waiting for Love? As usual. You all got coffees? Okay, let's start."

The four faces of Rage's LGBTQ group stared at him in smiling admiration.

"Well, first of all, one little announcement. So, I've finally saved enough money for my operation. I'm going under in two months. Isn't that amazing? I'm finally going to become a woman."

"Oh my God oh my God oh my God."

Four sets of hands wrapped around the long, horselike face, stroked the long feminine hair, and ran down the long, light blue dress. One squeezed a smooth tight buttock through the dress before being slapped away.

"Rage, we are so happy for you. My only question is, when are you going to shave that beard off? It's not, um, ladylike at all."

Sky's fingers reached out and twisted, taking short black facial hairs with it. Rage's big hand slapped it away.

"Who says? There are plenty of bearded women around. Anyway, I like it. I'll get rid of it before the operation of course, but I just want to wear it to the end."

"Good for you, Rage," said Joe. "I've always had a thing for beards."

The door burst open, and a cold wind ruffled clothing and hair. Short hair, white collared shirt and dark black jeans, Love pulled at the cigarette with pursed lips, before spraying the room with thick smoke.

"Sorry I'm late guys, had to change a tyre for some poor girl who didn't know a wrench from a water bottle."

"Finally, we're all here. Sit down, Love, I was just about to start."

"Good. I'll just grab an expresso first Barney, hold the sugar."

"For fuck's sake, Love, you can't smoke in here. I tell you that every week."

The cigarette butt came lose from the corner of her mouth and flicked out the door and down the street, leaving a tiny trail of orange crumbs behind it. The door creaked shut.

"Now, give me my expresso, Barney, please, I don't have all day."

"Right, well, now that we're all here, let's get started," said Rage.

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