Can't Stand It

"I can't stand the fact that you don't love me back"

Yoongi is in love with his best friend, Jimin.

Jimin is in love with someone else.

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Darkness. That's all that's here. Well, that and my unwanted thoughts that follow after of course. Those thoughts I wish to get rid of. The thoughts of him. I shouldn't have these thoughts, not ones like this. I know I shouldn't. Yet, I still do.

"Park Jimin." I whisper into the darkness of the small room. Light that's present is due to the sun's morning glow creeping in through the window and past the thick curtains. That light is the only thing that's keeping me from drowning in my thoughts. Thoughts of Jimin, my best friend. If I was in complete darkness, there's no telling when I would snap out of them.

*buzz*

I sit up and look over at my phone that's sitting on the black nightstand next to my bed. It's screen lights up as it vibrates again. I sigh and pick up from the dark spray painted wood. 

I look down at the screen to see I have two new messages, both being from Jimin.

“Hey, idiot, wake up!”
“Come open your door, it's freezing out
here!”

I scoff at his disrespect, but nonetheless, I yank off my cover and rush downstairs to open the door for him. When I open it, he instantly walks past me and into the warm house. He sits down on the couch and holds his legs to his chest, trying to give them some warmth.

 

“Yoongi, I'm cold. Come give me warmth.” He says with a pout set on his lips. I chuckle at him but does as he says. Grabbing the blanket from off of the living room chair, I sit down next to him while draping the thick cloth over us. Our arms brush and my heart starts pounding, but I try to remain cool.

 

“So why exactly are you here so early? School doesn't start for another hour.” I ask the younger. He rarely ever comes over early unless it's for something important.

 

“Today's the day, Yoongi.” Jimin exclaims as he runs his fingers through his blonde hair. I look at him, confused as to what he was talking about.

“I'm finally going to tell him.” He says while shaking me. I was still confused for a moment before it finally clicked in my head. He's going to tell him. Tell his crush that he likes him.

“You're still going to help me, right?” He asks as he looks at me with wide and pleading eyes. My eyes go soft and I give him a soft and reassuring gummy smile.

“Of course I'll help you.” I answer. A smile is shown on his face as he tightly hugs me. 

“You're the best, you know that?” He says while still holding onto me. My heart is beating at an unbelievable speed, and I try to calm myself down before it pops out of my chest. I don't answer his question, but I don't think he realizes. He only stands up and walks towards the kitchen, more than likely to steal more of my food.

I watch him walk away, and when he's out of the room, I let out a sigh. I can't believe he's finally going to tell him. Jimin is finally going to tell his crush Jungkook that he likes him, and I said I was going to help. 

Honestly, I didn't want to help. I mean, I've liked Jimin for two years. I wanted to be with him more than anything. But he's completely in love with someone else. Someone who clearly doesn't love him back. I knew Jungkook didn't like Jimin. It was clear that he only saw him as a friend. I've even tried to tell Jimin that Jungkook didn't see him in that way, but he refused to listen. He's too blinded by his feelings.

 I'm no better though. Instead of trying to lead Jimin away from heartbreak, I only agreed to helping make it happen. I let my feelings get in the way of it. Instead of telling him what needed to be said so he wouldn't end up hurt, I told him I'd help so I could see his smile. 

His smile. It means so much to me. But I let it break down my reasonable side. The side of me that helps Jimin see that he can't spend all of his time in his own little made up world. The side that shows him reality. I let out another frustrated sigh as I run my fingers through my hair.

Jimin returns with four waffles on a plate, all of them drizzled with syrup. He sits back down next to me and grabs the remote to turn on the small tv in front of us.

“None for me?” I ask. He turns to look at me and swallows his food. 

“Last time I checked, you knew how to make your own food.” 

I chuckle at his response, knowing he was right. 

“Now hurry up and get ready. I don't want to be late for my confession.”

I stand up and smile at him before walking up the stairs towards my bedroom. My smile fades when I'm out of his sight.

As I enter my room and shut the door, I sigh and whisper quietly to myself, 

“I can't let him do this.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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