Days of roses

"The sun soaking our skin and filling our minds with the idea that our lives would be golden , rose golden"

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1. Days of roses

~~
Pink roses ,

That was his gift to me , on our first day.

Oh , how the sun had shone upon us , soaking our skin and filling us with the idea that everything in our lives would be golden, rose golden.

I had fallen for a sailor boy ,

whose tanned arms had stood out pleasantly against the pale sand of the shore, we sat and watched the rolling waves. He taught me how to navigate using the stars

We spent our hours in a world that felt as close to picturesque as possible


Days passed by , and in the weeks that followed them,  the hue of our roses darkened to a deep red. A storybook romance, the purest admiration of one another. We talked of futures together, of cottages by the sea, of white weddings, of children and happy endings  We held onto those dreams , and each other's hands , as our time marched on

Quite soon I found myself walking down the aisle , to the sounds of the songs I used to love. There was no one to give me away, we had no white wedding gown , we had no diamonds , but the happy tears in my eyes sparkled just as brightly. Bright , soft petals of carnation and rose strewn at my feet. I could not have wished for a better life, and the kiss we shared at the top of the courthouse is one I would always remember.


It makes me smile now , to think of how fanciful we used to be.

~~~~~
Years of saving and scraping together whatever we could , meant that we barely afforded our storybook cottage. Which turned out to be quite cold and damp in the evenings. He said he didn’t mind, it was far worse out at sea. We shared a laugh , as I smiled and placed a fresh white rose bouquet above the mantelpiece


I watched it wilt and wither, as it appeared our dreams did too


There were to be no children , no happy family that we dreamed of . And although he held me as close as he could  ad he consoled me, I knew we both felt a gap , like a black hole had opened itself up between us.

The flowers were forgotten then , for longer than I care to remember

~~~~~~~~

 He revived them , once more                                

A bouquet of Asphodels , accompanied with a thin smile that failed to disguise a pained face , warped by the onslaught of the years , that no longer resembled that of the young man I fell in love with , a young man who spent his mornings at sea and his night’s rambling about the beauty of the waves . Hovering close to the bright blooms he looked far too frail , simply didn't match.

I clasped him almost as close as the flowers, closing my eyes for a few moments and wondering where in our timeline we had abandoned our days of roses.  He bade me farewell , and promised to come home with tales of the ocean. He ran his hands through my hair , patched by now with silver.


As I watched the great wooden ship shrink into the distance, I listened to the howling wind batter our windows  and decided the asphodels would look much better indoors. I swept away the dust on the mantel , which had grown thick over time ,and left them in their place.

~~~~~

On the day the news arrived , I cleared the house of flowers.

Uncaring , blinded by emotion I threw them into the expanse of the garden,which always seemed too large for just the two of us.

The rain was still beating down , mercilessly. I gazed out into the shoreline , willing a ship to appear on the horizon, but to no avail

~~~~
                                            .                     .                     .

His favourite colour was white , I like to believe that he would have admired the way the cool , bright marble stood out against the green grass of the hill. I stood alone, the soft breeze gently swaying my black shawl , and lifting my thin hair into the sky.

I knelt on the damp earth, to place his bouquet of asphodels atop the freshly turned soil, saddened by their appearance

They had wilted , and the rain had left them quite drowned

 

He matched them now.

 

 

 


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