The Loneliest Traid

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  • Published: 2 Apr 2017
  • Updated: 13 May 2017
  • Status: Complete
Love and death and war and Gods and blood and magic and dancing and rest and revenge and kings and fate.
Don't worry, within these three stories you'll know yourself,
And I will put you back together again.

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54. Rebuild

Jinmi didn’t know how long he had waited with Samhain.  He promised it would be until he had rested up, and then until he had stopped having such bad nightmares about his own family.

    But one day, Samhain said his name in his sleep before cracking awake, his head tipping back onto his shoulder.  Samhain’s eyes always were the same when he woke up.  Guilty to see Jinmi still waiting for him, but his hands pulled him closer.  

    “Bad dream?” Jinmi asked.

    Samhain yawned, running his fingers through his braided hair and stopping to dab at the parts he had pulled at it until his scalp tore out.  Jinmi laced their fingers together.  No one wanted to feel that their dreams were real.

    “Yes, but I think it’s getting better.”

    “Really?”

    Samhain squeezed his hand, “You were there.”

    “I heard.”

    “You didn’t burn like my family did.  You just took me up from the fires and we left together.  No one even noticed us, we just walked away.”

    Jinmi leaned his chin on his head.  They fit together, in a way that no one ever knew, a blessing others searched for and they stumbled upon, being to apart of someone else that it creates something new, and much bigger than yourself.

    “What do you think that means?”

    Samhain had guessed that whatever God had been murdered had something to do with family, or friendship.  That would now explain why Jinmi featured in his dreams.  But what he couldn’t understand was why he as sent such warnings.  

    “Maybe,” he said, “The lanterns weren’t for us at all.”

    “No?”

    “Maybe they were just enchanted to make the Gods feel remorse for those who died, maybe it meant nothing.”

    Jinmi hummed, “Maybe.  And the God who died?”

    “I still don’t know, but…”

    “But?”

    Samhain glanced up at him through his eyelashes, downcasting as soon as they caught the weight of Jinmi’s gaze, “Maybe, if you’re in my dreams now things will be okay.  Maybe things are getting better.”

    “Do you think so?”

    “Yeah,” he smiled, “I do.”

Jinmi tugged his hand around his shoulders, leaning down to give Samhain enough height on him so that he could rest his head back against his arm, “I hope those dreams stop too.  You react worst of all to them, and I can never find time to sleep between it.”

“Are you tired?”

He hummed again, “A little.”

“Sleep so,” Samhain kissed his temple, a new shock rippling through the two, a wave of confidence that young love faces, “I’ll try to stay awake for a little.”

“Thank you, Samhain.”

“And-”

“And?”

Will you leave tomorrow.  Will this be the final time I map your breathing and your heart and how your lips find my skin in your sleep and will I stop letting myself wrap around you, pry myself away from fitting together and will I have to let you go when the morning comes?

“Do… Do you ever think that it’s ridiculous that you stay up here with me?”

“On the roof?”

“Yes, is it never… I don’t know.”

Jinmi smiled, his eyes already shut, “I was thinking about that, but why don’t you use inside the tower?  We could renovate it, if you like.  I’ll help you make a bed and we can bring the blankets down.  It’ll be warmer, and more like a home than a trap, if you don’t mind my saying so.”

“You’d help me do that?  I mean… There’s nothing down there, I just have never found it in myself to need to redo it.”

“Of course I’ll help you.  Unless-”

You can see through my excuse.  That I want to stay, that I want you build your life up just so that it makes it easier for me to fit into the space we make.  I don’t want to leave just yet, can you see through me?
    “Unless you’d rather I didn’t?” he said.

Samhain kissed his temple again, “I’d love that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

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