The Adventures of Zombie Land

(I do not own Zombieland or any characters....only the story idea)

After barely surviving the wonderful horrors of the zombie infested Pacific play land, the gang Tallahassee, Columbus, Wichita, and little Rock decide a children's theme park is far too dangerous (and lame in Tallahassee's opinion) to call home. So they decide to head off and embark towards the city of Sin; yup Las Vegas! So off they go in their huge yellow hummer and their bags full of guns to do a little gambling...and most likely zombie killing.
But of course Tallahassee's never ending quest to find more twinkies forces them to stop at a now abandoned Mega Target. And while looking for supplies and (hostess snacks) they find themselves in a battle against disgruntled undead target employees, and also bump into a beautiful Sword wielding, mean zombie killing machine who seems to have her eyes set on the same prize as Tallahassee. Possible Twin flame...or Motorcycle riding, Twinkie Stealing dame?


1. Columbus's Thoughts

    ​ Tallahassee never ceases to surprise me. One moment he's a zombie ass kicking War machine, finding countless, creative ways to eliminate the dead; then next he is a muscular Kook quickly consumed in his never ending desire to find his one sweet temptation. The yellow spongy, white filled pleasure, that's possibly worth  dying for in his eyes; yes...I speak of no other but the Twinkie.

    Now I didn't think his obsession for the Hostess snack could get any worse, but after rescuing the girls from pacific play land, and little Rock was able to retrieve one of the delicious cream filled pieces of heaven; he has been hell bent on finding more ever since.

    I remember it like it was yesterday...well technically it was. But as I was saying I remember so well how his eyes lit up, as she tossed the tiny yellow missile his way. How he savagely opened the wrapper, like a child would a present on Christmas morning. How he fondled it with his eyes; studied its shape like a piece of fine art. How he ran his nose against it, breathing in deeply its aroma; like a smoker would smelling his favorite Cuban cigar. Only this is no cigar, no people this is a twinkie. A yellow spongy tube shaped cake, that he slowly took of bite of; Letting the cream filling explode in his mouth (pause), causing him to smile in pure delight; because his dreams had finally come true. Two months since the world had gone to shit, and Tallahassee had found his small yellow lover. And he enjoyed every millisecond of that brief and delicious encounter.

            It was nice to see him Enjoying the little things; really it was. And in a world filled with menacing flesh eating freaks trying to make a snack out you every other left in right, its nice to know that you can still find some happiness in Zombie land. Even if it does come in the form of a Hostess delight called the twinkie. But now my shot gun bearing Companion is even more obsessed then ever. And I mean Annoying MORE THEN EVER!

     We thought one would appease him but no; we all should of known one was not enough. He must have more! And now he is on the hunt, a never ending mission to find another one... another hit...of delicious fluffy twinkie. And every gas station, or tiny convenience store, even Trucks; could hold the key of seeing his one true love again. This is Nuts! But who's going to stop him? I'm sure not...this a man who chose to chop off the head of fat overgrown fleshy with hedge cutters, when he could of easily blown it off with a shot gun. much as would like to tell him your twinkie fetish is koo koo for cocoa puffs, I prefer he take his violent killing needs out on the fleshies of zombie land. I'd like to keep all my fingers and toes and limbs.

       So...oh well on we go. Next stop supposedly to Las Vegas... the casino clustered city that I have heard so much about but never had the pleasure to see. And now we were on our way to the city of Sin. To see the scenery...or whatever is left of it that is. You never know what to expect in Zombie land. So on we go to Vegas Nevada; we are on our way! Well that's if we don't keep stopping every 20 mins because of Tallahassee. But who's going to stop him? So... We are somewhat on our way.

  -Columbus OH    






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