Entries From A Blonde

Poems I write. All original. Sorry for the depression

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10. Future

Just a little writing that has been on my mind lately. Sorry not sorry for the depression.

 

When I started thinking about the future... My future... I started out just small about what I wanted to be when I grew up. It was simple stuff teachers tell us to think about. It slowly became more in dept and the closer i got to high school the deeper it became. It was almost like I was... falling. Falling somewhere I cant stop or control. Actually, its more like digging a hole. it seems to me that I am more digging a giant hole without a ladder or steps to get me out. the top of the hole is slowly getting smaller and smaller and it seems like an outside source is throwing the old dirt on top of me. As if everyone has forgot that I am down here. Maybe the outside source is doing this to help everyone else. Maybe the hole is causing something bad to the ones around. Maybe they're doing it to make sure no one falls, or perhaps to make me stop. Who knows, maybe they're doing it to get me to climb out. instead I am sitting here. Writing this. Wondering how I got here. How I got myself sucked into the reality of my future. I have no hope, little motivation, and an empty pocket. How could I make it with that? My closest friend continues to grab my hand and try to pull me out but I continue to fall back in and dig farther down. How long can she keep going? How long before she realizes the truth for me and my future. She says she will always be there and always push me through but how will she pull me out when I get out of reach? 

What will she do then?

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