18 year old Maya faces the death of her Nanna, the most important person in her life. New love interest Nathan brings back a spark into Maya's life. She quickly falls in love with him; They both make promises but who will be the one to break theirs? Read on to find out how Maya deals with the challeneges thrown at her.


16. Lesson 1: Happiness

Chapter 16

Can you seek closure from someone who isn’t dead? Can you ever agree with yourself to leave someone you’ve loved more than anyone else?

A thousand questions were spinning inside my head. I stared blankly at Nathan, except everything I’ve seen in the last couple days had made me wonder if I was still looking at the same man. I wasn’t- not anymore. He was... just another attractive man. There wasn’t a heart in him, not one that I saw, anyway. But now, the hard part was leaving someone who really only had me to look after them.

I sighed more heavily than I intended. I leaned forward to grab a pen and notebook from Nathan’s night stand- I guess the easiest way to say goodbye was to write it.

I bit hard on my lip, not knowing how to even put my feelings into words. I knew that this is what I wanted and these kind of decisions never came easy. But it had to be done.


There really is no easy way to say this. I just need to go… I can’t stay here with you and pretend everything will be okay once you get back to health. My heart hurts to see you like this, but I can’t keep doing this Nathan. I’m just so hurt. I won’t even explain what happened with Chloe at this point.

I stopped for a moment. I crossed out the last sentence because I knew Nathan deserved an explanation.

Chloe left. Turns out, she and Toni were together (I know this definitely makes no sense) and only used you to pretend she was straight in front of her dad. And, I’m so sorry about this, but Chloe wasn’t ever pregnant. She used it as an excuse to get you to stay with her and not be tempted by me when you came back.

I know this is important, you catching up and all- but I need to go. I can’t stay, not for another moment. I need to see my life as beautiful without you having to be in it. It seems like since I'd known you, I'd relied so heavily on you to be my main source of happiness. It got to a point where I couldn't make myself happy and I hated it. I want to learn how to be happy myself. I want to have a future, without you in that perfect idea of what I want in life. Don’t get me wrong, I love you so much more than I can ever express, but maybe that’s why it’s so hard for me. Because you can screw me over everyday and hurt me to the point my heart is bleeding and I still take you back every, single, time.

And as for the future? Who knows. Maybe I’ll take Toni’s advice and go to school, or maybe volunteer or- I’ll travel the world! I’ll make it baby, I promise. No, not baby. Nathan- I’m sorry it ends like this, with you ill right now. Bad timing, I guess.

One last thing. The night Chloe wanted you to be with her, and you kissed me in the bathtub, I thought maybe for once you could come back to me. But recently, I realised. I don’t want you to keep coming back whenever you’re bored. I’ so much of a second choice to you, and there’s no point trying to deny it.

On this day, Maya Cheyenne Trevino realises she deserves better.

-Maya x

I got up from the chair and left the note on Nathan’s chest, under his resting hands. I kissed his cheek and left the room, feeling like a new woman in all the best ways.


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