I did it for you

I felt the sickening voice of God as he shoved me off of the clouds of heaven. I fell far and fast, screaming. My wings burning away. They couldn’t catch me. They fluttered lifelessly as I fell.

I felt warm tears streaming down my face like acid. I was getting kicked out of Heaven and becoming a fallen angel. I felt the burning sensation of guilt and hatred deep in my chest. Why?

I was a fallen Angel. I turned to look at my pure white wings, Only now I saw a few streaks of grey and smoke trailing from them. I was kicked out of my home, I couldn’t bare the pain,

I waited for the sickening smack of the hard earth ground... but it never came.

I slightly opened up my eye’s and saw green. Beautiful green grass and tall green trees.
I pulled myself up, groaning in slight pain as my useless wings sagged behind my body.

“Earth.” I whispered.


2. Chapter 1

“Light it up, baby girl.” one of my best friends, Jack slurred, his floppy brown hair falling into his eyes. I giggled, still stoned, the cement and wooden room spinned softly.


I reached over clumsily and flicked the lighter open and lit his joint. He inhaled and  lifted it gently from his lips and exhaled, a cloud of white smoke flowing from his mouth like puffs of an angel’s soul.


“Hey babe!” I turned and saw my friend Emily, her short cropped red hair flinging around her face and her deep brown eyes hazy.


She was holding a bottle of something unfamiliar that she had probably stolen from her older brother. The liquid inside sloshed up against the walls of the bottle as Emily stumbled towards us.


“Hi.” I said slowly, my mind relaxed and this warm feeling spread from the tips of my toes to my head.


“Light me one too.” She slurred and dumped her backpack on the floor and pulled out her secret stash of Heaven onto my garage floor.  I gladly lit her one and passed it over once she stumbled over.


“Wow.” She took it from my hand and breathed in.


“The sweet smell of release.” she murmured. I laughed a little and then felt my head tilt down, in drowsiness.


“Someone is a little sleepy!” I heard Jack’s voice in the background, my speakers blaring Paramore's “Ignorance”.   


“Come here baby girl.” Jack said and pulled me over to him, my long sleeved shirt slipped up revealing my cuts. Ugly/bitch/fat/ugly over and over written on my arms. Forever.


It seemed like the music stopped when they saw them. Emily’s face froze and Jack looked like he could throw up.


“Baby girl, what are these?” He whispered.


I slowly rolled over and looked up at him, meeting his eyes was like meeting Death himself. They weren’t understanding, they were confused. My back on the cold metal ground. I felt like I was going to pass out. Jack. Emily. Cuts. They saw them. I tried to stand up, but fell back down, Need to get out of here.


“We need to go.” Jack nudges Emily and they both stand up, not taking their stuff, and tripping over their own feet and running out of the garage door, leaving it open. The chilly winter wind bellowed into the room, gushing over me.


I curled up into a ball and try to keep myself warm. I can’t get up, a numbness has spread over my body.


I shake the numb feeling out of my right arm and reach into my jeans pocket and pull out my blade. I shakily pull up my sleeve and then, draw the blade across my skin, working it like a masterpiece I draw in another series of words that gushed with blood.


But this time I add freak. Right on my vien. As I slowly lose the ability to stay awake, Tears prick in my eyes and I let them loose.


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