Begin Again: Seabastian Michaelis x Reader Modern AU

When you finally decided to accept Sebastian's invitation to coffee after breaking up with your ex boyfriend, it led to something you had waited for since you first met Sebastian. Based on "Begin Again" by Taylor Swift.

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1. Begin Again

A/N: I’m kinda writing from experience with this one ... recently I just went through something that kinda made me lose my faith in love for a while, and, I’m still trying to pick up the pieces.  November 11th would have been our first anniversary.  It ended on October 11th.  We never really fought, my ex and I, and we shared a lot of good times, and that’s what made it hard to come back from.  Luckily for me, I had found an anime my ex wanted to watch but never got to, so I watched it.  Black Butler helped and is still helping me get back to who I was before my world crashed down around me.

            I’m using Begin Again by Taylor Swift for this reader-insert.  Our favourite demon butler, Sebastian, has been humanized for the sake of this story.  I needed a villain, so I used Claude (to be frank, I don't really like Claude ...).  I own nothing that I mentioned of using.  Modern AU and all characters are in college, if anyone was wondering, and I’m kinda using The Making of Black Butler II OVA to guide this.  (P/N) stands for Professor’s Name.

            -Panda-

 

Took a deep breath in the mirror

He didn’t like it when I wore high heels

But I do

*           *           *

To be honest, you were attached to the outfit you were wearing.

            It wasn’t exactly casual, and it wasn’t exactly formal.  It was that beautiful blend of comfortable and stylish.

            Your (F/C) off the shoulder shirt hung off of you in just the right way.  Skinny jeans were paired with it along with heeled boots that came up to your knees.  Your ex-boyfriend never liked it when you dressed up for a girls’ day out with Mey-Rin, Lizzie, and Hannah.  Of course, it gave Claude Faustus a reason to be jealous.  Your best friend Sebastian always offered the compliments you knew you deserved along with some ideas for other outfits.

            You felt your eyes begin stinging.  Eight months ago, you were being comforted by your best friend over the death of a pet, and Claude overreacted.  A hug from Sebastian had been enough to end what toxic relationship you had with your ex.  Despite all the warning signs, you had put your heart and soul into it, and it hurt like hell to watch Claude walk away.

            Sebastian was the first person you texted about the end of the relationship.  With the usual sympathetic gestures, he also sent an invitation back.

            Whenever you feel like you’re ready to forget about him and have fun again, his text said, meet me at your favourite café.  We could hang out like we usually do.

*           *           *

Turn the lock and put my headphones on

He always said he didn’t get this song

But I do

I do

*           *           *

It was why you were grabbing your music player and headphones.  It was a short walk from your home, and you knew from your conversations with Sebastian, you were going to be out for hours.  You locked your door in case of anything bad happening to your belongings, and pocketed your keys.

            You pressed play on your music player, and smiled.  It was one of your favourite songs of all time.  Your ex never understood why you loved the song.  You fought with Claude once over the song, and barely won that match.  To be frank with yourself, you never understood why you liked it either.  You just ... did.

*           *           *

Walked in, expecting you’d be late

But you got here early and you stand and wave

I walk to you

*           *           *

You opened the door, and the bartista that usually served you gave you a smile.  A quick scan of the room had you initially disappointed.  You couldn’t see your rave-haired friend anywhere.

            As you did another scan, you noticed a hand waving at you and a dark-haired male grinning from ear to ear.

            A small smile hit you and walked over to him.  Sebastian Michaelis always made a big deal about getting to class early, and it shouldn’t surprise you that he would make it early to a date.  To be honest, it kind of surprised you that you didn’t see him the first glance around the room.

*           *           *

You pull my chair out and help me in

And you don’t know how nice that is

But I do

*           *           *

“Hey,” he said as you stopped in front of him.  His eyes gave you the once over, and his grin looked different as his eyes reconnected with yours.  “You look good, girl.  What brought on the semiformal outfit?  I just wanted to hang out with you.”

            You giggled and tucked a lock of (H/C) hair behind your left ear.  “Maybe I felt like dressing up a little,” you answered as you scanned him.  Of course, he was wearing the least formal thing he could find ... jeans, sneakers, and a Fall Out Boy T-shirt.  “And you?  I thought you would be the one to stress dressing up.”

            He rubbed the back of his neck.  “I just got off work.  You won’t believe how tiring it gets wearing a tailcoat for four hours.”

            You giggled again.  Of course, you wouldn’t admit it out loud that Sebastian looked good in his uniform at the local butler café.  The one time you did see him at work, you couldn’t.  Your then boyfriend would’ve cussed you out for apparently cheating on him with your best friend.  Something inside you sank a little.  If Claude found you here with Sebastian, you wouldn’t see the light of another day.

            Sebastian’s hand on your shoulder brought you back to the present.  There was no Claude around to speak of:  Just you and your best friend, having a cup of coffee together.  For once, you were grateful.  Sebastian was a nice painkiller for a broken heart.  He helped you cope with the pain for the past eight months, encouraging you to go out shopping with the girls, or bringing you along on a movie night with him, Ciel, Lizzie, and Alois.

            “Milady.”  He gave you a gentle shove into the space between the table and the chair, and you perched yourself on the chair.  Sebastian pushed both you and the chair into a spot that was comfortable enough for you to sit and sip your coffee.

            “Thanks,” you offered with a smile.  The Claude wound in your soul acted up, and you felt it slip from your face.  “Y’know, Claude never did pull out a chair for me, even when we started dating.”

            Sebastian took the spot across the table from you and he shot you a look of sympathy.  “I know, (Y/N).”  His look of sympathy disappeared as he waved a server over.  Your eyes widened.  It couldn’t be....

*           *           *

And you throw your head back, laughing

Like a little kid

*           *           *

“Ciel Phantomhive?” you asked.

            Ciel smirked and set down his tray to start scribbling on the order form.  “Hey, guys.  You’re looking better, (Y/N).  Even Paula was saying how much better you got after Claude left.”  The blue eyed server winked as he got a little closer to you.  “On a date with Sebastian?  Wasn’t expecting that.”

            Sebastian laughed.  “I invited her out when Claude dumped her.  Poor girl had her heart torn to shreds by the douchebag.”

            You cleared your throat and elbowed Ciel.  “I am here, Michaelis,” you said as you sent Sebastian a grin worthy of a cartoon villain.  You looked back at Ciel.  “Now, are you taking our order?”

            “Of course,” Ciel assured as he pressed the tip of his pen to the paper.  “You’ll have your usual, right, (Y/N)?”

            “One caramel latte, yep,” you confirmed as Ciel started scribbling the order.  You eyed Sebastian and you went back to watching Ciel at work.  “For Sebastian, maybe get him the peppermint cappuccino, unless he objects.”  Your gaze returned to your raven-haired friend.

*           *           *

I think it’s strange that you think I’m funny cause

He never did

*           *           *

“Peppermint sounds great,” Sebastian replied weakly.  His smile was much weaker than earlier.

            Ciel’s scribbling came to a halt as he put both his pen and paper in his apron and he picked up his tray.  Ciel’s smirk had gotten bigger as he walked away, a swagger in his step.  “I’ll be sure to be back quickly, you guys.  Have fun on your date.”

            You sighed as you slouched in your chair.  Only Ciel would tease both you and Sebastian about it.  Ciel had been friends with Sebastian for years before you met them both.  Mey-Rin had been the one to introduce you to both of them at freshman orientation, and they had much more friends in common than you were led to believe.  You never expected to walk out of that orientation with that many phone numbers.

            “How’s your homework coming?” Sebastian asked.  He was a psychology major like you were, and you both shared the same classes.  You didn’t mind: he was a huge help when it came to homework.

*           *           *

I’ve been spending the last eight months

Thinking all love ever does

Is break and burn and end

But on a Wednesday in a café

I watched it begin again

*           *           *

“It’s going,” you answered as you perked back up.  Anything at this point was better than moping over Claude.  “At least I’m clear from distractions.  Claude was awful when I wanted to do homework.”

            Sebastian smiled.  “Yeah.  You guys had that huge fight over your schedule right in the lounge.  I think even Tanaka had a tough time trying to break you guys up.”

            You nodded and your gaze turned to look at the street outside the window.  Tanaka was an old man that was your building supervisor.  You and your friends all lived in the same building, and Tanaka had been offering help with your relationship with Claude and balancing your schedule, but it all ended up being in vain.  After a fight that resulted in not speaking for a week and months of trying to work things out, Claude ended the relationship you had grown to cherish.

            Sebastian took your hand over the table.  “You need to stop thinking about him, (Y/N).  You’re hanging out with me,” he said, snapping you from your thoughts.  When you focused your attention on him again, you hadn’t realized his naturally ruby irises had gone as hard as the gemstone and he had an almost angry expression on his face.

            “I’m sorry,” you answered as you looked at your interlocked hands.  Sebastian’s fit yours much better than Claude’s ever did, and you felt something flutter inside.

            His eyes and expression grew soft again and he offered you a smile.  “It’s okay.  I know you can’t help it.  Nasty breakups like that seem to stick around for a long time.”  Something in his eyes changed and he grew distant.  “My breakup with Beast was like that.  It took me almost a whole year to get over her.  When I finally did, I realized how happy I was on my own.”

            “I remember,” you agreed.  The end of the last relationship Sebastian had was awful to watch.  You spent days on end with him trying to be of use to him.  When the sadness in his eyes finally disappeared, you treated him to coffee and a movie with Lizzie and Ciel.

            “Your drinks, guys,” Ciel said as he set his tray down.  You didn’t notice his approach, and you flinched at the sound of the server’s voice.  Your blue-eyed friend smirked when his eyes met yours.  “A little deep in thought, aren’t you, (Y/N)?”

            “A little,” you admitted.  You looked down at your hands.  You wanted to avoid sad topics as much as possible, but it seemed inevitable.

            Ciel laughed and placed your order in front of you.  “You always were one for zoning out, (Y/N).”  He winked and started walking away.  “Call me tomorrow with how your date went, okay?  I gotta meet Lizzie.”

            Sebastian smiled as Ciel hugged you and fist-bumped Sebastian.  “Have fun,” Sebastian answered as he took a sip.

            “Sure.  Later.”

*           *           *

You say you never met one girl who

Had as many James Taylor records as you

But I do

*           *           *

Like so many times before, you and Sebastian got lost in the conversation.  It covered a wide variety of subjects from papers to professors, and from anime to music.  Of course, Sebastian had known about your collection of records you inherited from your late grandfather.  It always amazed him how much jazz you had in your collection, and how little you played them.

            By the time you guys were starting to wind your conversation down, your usual bartista came by to let the both of you know it was closing down for the night.  Of course, Sebastian had already offered you his arm, and you willingly took it.

            He was kinder than what Claude ever was, and he smiled a lot more.

            Maybe that’s what made this date with Sebastian a lot more awkward than you expected.

*           *           *

You tell stories and you don’t know why

I’m coming off a little shy

But I do

*           *           *

You noticed the blush eventually creep up into your cheeks.  Of course, it was the second week into December, and you were hoping he would brush it off as the cold.

            Of course, Sebastian noticed and gave you the slyest smirk in his arsenal.  He was telling you stories of his childhood, and how his dad would always pull something ridiculous in the days leading up to Christmas.

            You noticed your own laugh being held back as he talked about the one prank his father pulled.  You weren’t usually a shy person, considering you had fought with Claude a lot in public, but Sebastian was different than Claude.

            So much different, that the confusion evoked the cuteness of being shy.  For once, you didn’t mind the constant flirting coming from him.  At least, Claude wasn’t around to yell at both you and Sebastian for it.

*           *           *

But you throw your head back, laughing

Like a little kid

*           *           *

After a while of wandering around, you two found a bench along the street to sit on.  Of course, it was much further from your place than you expected, but you would be okay.  Sebastian would make sure you would get home safely.

            “Nice night, huh?” he said finally.

            “Yeah.  It wasn’t as cold as the radio said it would be,” you answered, looking up at the sky.

            “Meteorologists are on crack these days.  What else is new?”  Sebastian exhaled a laugh, and scooted over closer to you.  “You’re cold, girl!  It’s like, minus two, and you’re shivering.”

            You smiled as you looked at Sebastian and rubbed your hands together.  “So?  I always get cold at this time of year.  It’s supposed to be winter.  The hell did you expect?”

            “You to let me know you’re cold.  Jeez, has Claude turned into an introvert, or what?”

            You felt your heart sink in your chest, and you looked away, your smile gone.  You had been too scared to get into another relationship ever since Claude.  “You know just as well as I do that’s not true,” you muttered, looking back up.  You could feel would be tears pricking at your eyes.

*           *           *

I think it’s strange that you think I’m funny cause

He never did

*           *           *

“Yeah.”  Sebastian stood and knelt in front of you.  “You better not cry, (Y/N).  You’re free to do whatever you want to do.  Faustus isn’t here to control you.”  He pressed a hand to your cheek and gave you the steely look you’d seen at the coffee shop.  “Next time I see the bastard, I’ll let him have it.  He ruined you, (Y/N).”

            You touched Sebastian’s hand on your face.  “You’re not the first to say that.  Even Alois has been saying that.”

            Sebastian’s iron gaze disappeared as he started laughing.  “Alois is the only one who’s still friends with him, and I’m surprised he’s managed to last this long.”  His hand left your face and he stood.  Offering you his hand, he asked, “Wanna see what’s going on at the rink?  I’ve been meaning to have a look at the little kids’ teams.”

            Hoping it would help you to forget Claude, you rose to your feet and took his hand.  “Sure.”

*           *           *

I’ve been spending the last eight months

Thinking all love ever does

Is break and burn and end

But on a Wednesday in a café

I watched it begin again

*           *           *

You spent the next day sleeping in.  You were lucky it was your day off from classes, and Sebastian had kept you out late.  You didn’t mind.  In fact, you had a good time with him.

            By noon, your cell rang and woke you up from your nap.  You knew from the ringtone it was Ciel.

            “Hey,” you answered groggily.  “What’s up?”

            “(Y/N), I got news!” Ciel almost screamed into your ear.

            “You almost blew my eardrums out, but shoot.  Whatcha got?” you groaned.

            “You’re gonna have to see it, but we got the call back from the studio who originally casted us for Black Butler,” Ciel chattered.  “There’s a sequel series that they want us to do, and they want us to have a look at the script.”  There was a pause before he continued.  “Sebastian and I are heading to the office to have a look at it.  I was gonna bring Lizzie, and I was thinking, Hey: Since Lizzie’s coming with me to have a look, maybe (Y/N) can come along with Sebastian to have a look, too.  She was a huge fan of the original series, and her opinion counts.  You’ll have the final say, like you did before.”

            You felt a smile quirk on your lips.  “That’s great news, Ciel!” you answered.

            “Besides that, how was the date with Sebastian?  Better than you thought?”

            “It was definitely the right thing to do.  It was a welcome distraction to the ever-daunting thoughts of Claude.”  You continued going on about the aimless wandering you guys did after the shop had closed up for the night.  You hadn’t smiled so much for a long time.

            Of course, Ciel was freaking out about you and Sebastian being his OTP and whatnot.  Ciel had known about your crush on Sebastian for the longest time, and he’d been always looking for excuses to get you and Sebastian alone together.

            “That’s so cute!” Ciel hollered.  “But you coming along to have a look at the script or not?”

            You thought for a moment.  “When are you guys gonna be going?”

            “Friday afternoon.  Sebastian told me about your schedule.”

            You smile grew.  You knew you could afford to miss at least one class.  “I’ll be sure to be there, Ciel.  We’ll hang out later and talk more about it, okay.  I kinda wanna finish my paper.”

            “Good luck with your paper.  See ya!”  There was a click, and conversation ended.

            Deciding against doing your paper before three in the afternoon, you fell back asleep.

*           *           *

And we walked down the block to my car

And I almost brought him up

But you start to talk about the movies

That your family watches every single Christmas

And I wanna talk about that

And for the first time

What’s past is past

*           *           *

You finished your paper before six, and met your friends for supper.  Of course, you knew you guys were going to eat out again.  You didn’t mind.  You always found something to keep you from thinking of Claude.

            Sebastian’s animated story was one of those things that kept your mind off of Claude.  Sebastian was retelling one of his childhood stories that you had heard before, but you couldn’t help listening to it.  He always seemed find a different way of telling it.

            After your friends shared a short bout of laughter, you ended up discussing about what many of you thought the script was going to be about, and when the right time was to meet.  Of course, you couldn’t wait to even hear how it sounded.  You were just as excited as your friends that were going to be looking at it.

            For once, you felt like you could forget about Claude and his overbearing antics.  You felt you could smile freely again.

*           *           *

Cause you throw your head back laughing

Like a little kid

I think it’s strange that you think I’m funny cause

He never did

I’ve been spending the last eight months

Thinking all love ever does

Is break and burn and end

But on a Wednesday in a café

I watched it begin again

*           *           *

You caught cold the day you were supposed to go with Ciel, Lizzie, and Sebastian to see the script.  It seemed to you that your rotten luck never seemed to change.

            Of course, you notified your professor you wouldn’t be in class that morning and traded that time for sleep.  Like the day before, your phone buzzed you awake at noon with a text from Sebastian.

            I heard from (P/N) you weren’t feeling good, so I let Ciel and Lizzie know.  You’ll meet me under the maple tree outside the main entrance at about three?  We’ll be back by then, and should have some of the script read over.  I have something urgent to tell you and only you, the text said.

            You felt a groggy smile pull at your lips as you sent him an extremely simple reply.

            Sure, was all your text said as you fell back asleep.

*           *           *

But on a Wednesday in a café

I watched it begin again

*           *           *

You woke up at two thirty and got yourself into a more presentable state.  Shortly after, you headed out into the winter.

            When you found Sebastian, he held a booklet in his hands and he was concentrating on it.

            You thought nothing of the book as you approached your friend.  You cleared your already scratchy throat, and waited for his response.

            Sebastian looked up at you and gave you a small smile as he shut the leaflet.  “Hey, (Y/N), glad you could make it,” he said pleasantly.  “Feeling any better?”

            You coughed and smiled back.  “A little.  Your text said something about it being urgent?” you asked.

            “Yeah, about that: you see, I have this little heart matter I’d like your opinion on.”  Sebastian’s smile almost turned shy.  “You see, I’ve been friends with this girl since we first met, and she’s been really sad since her ex left her.  Recently, I took this girl out for a night of hanging out.”  He shook his free arm and out came a red rose from his coat sleeve.  “I really like this girl, and I was wondering if she’d ever accept my offer.”

            You sneezed and laughed.  “What’s her name, Sebby?” you asked.

            “(Y/N).”

            You felt your cold face go as red as the flower he held.  “Wh-what?” you stuttered.  “Y-you have an offer to make me?”

            You saw the confidence in Sebastian’s ruby eyes return.  “Yeah.”  He knelt before you and offered the rose to you.  “(Y/N) (M/N) (L/N), will you be my girlfriend?  I can’t guarantee forever, but I can guarantee I’ll be better than Faustus.”  He eyed your face and his smirk grew.  “That, I can swear because I am simply one hell of a –”

            You smothered Sebastian’s mouth with your shoulder as you hugged him, the emotions you were feeling were so strong.  You felt the flower get tucked into your hair and felt an arm wrap around you.

            “I’ll take that as a yes,” he murmured.

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