Break On Me

"Maybe it's not about the happy ending.. Maybe it's about the story."

Sometimes it’s hard to accept what is, and it’s hard to go along with something even though you know you could do better.. But how come it’s so easy to slip up? So easy to say the wrong thing, use the wrong words, or even make the wrong moves? Sometimes we just all need to break.. in more ways than just mentally. I want you to know, that no matter what, I will always be here for you.. whether you like it or not, if you want me here or if you want me to live.. If you love me, or if you hate.. You can always break on me baby.

We loose ourselves in the things we love, we find ourselves there too..


3. Chapter 002


It’s not like I wanted to be in this situation, I never intended to take my eyes off the road, I didn’t leave the house this morning knowing I was going to end up here when the sun sat. Nor did I know that I would leave everything in Emmy’s hands. The house, the company, keeping track of the money and the bills, taking care of Katie, and.. taking care of me.
This wasn’t the best time for this to happen, not that I want it to happen any other time. It’s just that ever since the pregnancy, Emmy’s health problems have gotten a little worse, not by much but by enough to make me worry about her every second of every day, not that I didn’t before, but still even more than ever.
The pregnancy had a huge strain on Emmy’s body. Her depression didn’t get affected, but a lot of other things did. During her pregnancy she had begun to tell me her vision was becoming slightly fussy. So, I took her to the eye doctor and turns out the pressure on her body had caused her sight to get messed up a tad, but nothing contacts and glasses can’t fix. Besides, she had a small problem before so it’s nothing new.
But then there comes her menstruation cycles. Emmy’s always had horrible periods, meaning that she would cramp terribly and she would get all emotional and moody and her depression got worse and she hurt and ached everywhere. But now it’s even worse. Her periods have become irregular, the doctor said it was most likely because of her body changing during the pregnancy and her hormones and such.
As usual, though, nothing was perfect for us. I mean no one’s perfect, but we surely aren’t.

About an hour ago, just after Emmy left, I told one of the nurses that my neck was hurting really bad, it ached and it was sore. She put a brace on me so I wouldn’t move and it feels better to be honest. It was hurting so bad when Emmy would bump my arm, my shoulder blades fucking around my spine and causing my neck to sting and ache even more than it was already.
But I could never show pain in front of her, I couldn’t let her know she was the cause of it. She kind of wasn’t, but either way she would blame herself and not get my point at all, so I intended to keep that to myself.
Emmy was asleep on the couch, not too far from my bed. Niall had ran to his apartment and got the crib that we keep over there for when he watches her and stuff. He sat it up for us and the baby’s sleeping peacefully and has been for a while, thanks to him.
I could never explain to him how much I appreciate him. He done so much for me, for Emmy, for Katie. He was part of my family, blood or not blood, I didn’t care he was loyal and that was all that matters to me.

Blood makes you related, loyalty makes you family.

Before Emmy was allowed to see me, the doctors had explained that I was close to dying. If they would had been a minute late then I wouldn’t be here right now. They told me I had a slight concussion, that would explain the dizziness and horrible headache I’ve had since I woke up not that long ago.
I broke my left leg in two different places, one close to my ankle and the other was a fracture in my bone close to my knee. Yet have I to see it, but I definitely can feel it, there’s a five inch scar on my right side from a piece of glass that cut deep into my skin. It hurts, just like the rest of me does.
It’s scary to think that I could have died, never able to see Emmy and kiss her or hug her and tell her how much I love her again, never be able to marry her and grow old with her and spend forever with my one and only, or never able to rock my little angel to sleep and sing to her when she cries in my arms, not able to see her grow up into the beautiful woman I just know she’ll be one day.

It’s really scary.

They weren’t sure how long I’d have to stay here but they knew it was over two months. I’ll be in the hospital when my daughter turns a year old. One of the biggest birthdays she’ll ever have and I’ll be in a hospital bed instead of where I wanted to be, standing up beside her highchair as she dug her hands into her own little cake, getting it all over her pretty little face and all over her clothes and in her hair, smearing it all over the high chair and on whoever was nearby, probably me.
But that won’t happen because I’m a complete idiot. I just had to grab my phone. Emmy knows I love her, I didn’t have to tell her right then.. but I did.

Katherine Elizabeth Styles is the light of my world. She is my beautiful little princess, my angel, my everything. She inherited those beautiful blue eyes from Emmy, but took my kinky brown hair instead of Emmy’s natural wavy blonde locks. Katie’s hair was lighter than mine, probably because Emmy’s was a light color.
Katie got my dimples, but she’s definitely got Emmy’s nose, which is a good thing because Emmy’s nose is cute and the appropriate size for a girl, if that even makes sense or not. She surely did get Emmy’s adorable height.. no doubt.
My little darling was born on September 1st, 2016. She was six pounds and three ounces, only sixteen inches long, that part is a gift from her beautiful mother.
Katie is my best friend, no lie. We get up with each other in the early morning hours, before the sun even thinks about rising and before Emmy stirs and rolls over for the first time in one night. We watch SpongeBob at night, around 2am most of the time, then by 4 we watch something different. She usually wakes up every two to three hours at night. Thankfully it has changed since she’s gotten older. It used to be almost every hour when she was a newborn.

When it came to finding out and telling everyone we were expecting, my mother and my sister were happy and ready to get her into the world before she was hardly a baby yet, barely there. But surely on all of our minds at that time. Emmy’s mother was excited, she’s always wanted Emmy to experience motherhood, and she surely did.
The media loved it. They tried to snap pictures at every chance, following us more than usual and basically stalking Emmy wherever she went just so they could get a picture of her bump every now and then.
Mr. Matthews, on the other hand, wasn’t so pleased to find out that his daughter’s boyfriend, who he had loved so much just a few weeks before, had gotten his daughter pregnant before I even proposed. But I try not to let that affect me, even nowadays when they visit and he stares me down like I’m some demon.
I used to think he was so judgmental and wrong for being so pissed at me. But then there came a day. The day I held my little girl in my arms, wrapped up in the pink blanket. She opened those beautiful eyes and looked up at me. She was gorgeous, always will be.
I understood his reasoning. It was crazy to stare down at something I created. This was half of me in my arms, something that meant so much to me and I loved with all of my heart. I felt that sting in my heart as I stared down at her pretty face, I realized that one day there will be a guy that asks me to marry her or to take her to prom or even on a date, and I felt how hard that’s going to be.
But I can’t wait, only because I can’t wait to embarrass her. No, I’m joking. I just can’t wait to see the beautiful woman she grows up to be.
As for now, let’s keep it slow and let me enjoy her cute little giggles and baby talk, just for a little long, as long as possible.
Its Going To Get Better Ka :) ~Angie
Join MovellasFind out what all the buzz is about. Join now to start sharing your creativity and passion
Loading ...