Diaries of a Madman

When Discord breaks free of his stone prison, he proves to be much older and wiser than he was on the show. A being of ancient and unimaginable power, he forces Celestia to make a deal to save her little ponies. What she doesn't realize is that one of the terms of the deal is that she forgets ever making it. Enter Navarone, a poor human just trying to get by—or at least, to the ponies that's what he looks like. Pulled from his home by an accidental summoning from one Twilight Sparkle, Navarone is thrust into a world of ponies and more violence than he expected from such a peaceful seeming world. These are his adventures—with a few asides from everybody's favorite Lord of Chaos, of course.


106. Chapter Eighty-Five—No, Nav. You are the demons. Part 2

“Girls, we have to go!” Twilight shouted, waving the letter from Celestia around.

“What’s the problem?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Princess Celestia needs us to do something. We need to leave right away!”

To straight up lose, or to keep the game going... “Girls, what about Taya here?” I said before any of them could move. “Celestia apparently teleported her father away with no warning. Should we really leave her here without a guardian?”

“Hm... Taya, would your father be okay with that?” Twilight asked.

“He would be if we left him a message!” Taya quickly answered.

Twilight nodded. “Spike, if Nav gets back before we do, let him know that we took Taya with us. And tell him not to worry, she’ll be safe. Now let’s go, girls! We have a train that’s leaving in ten minutes to catch!” Twilight immediately began trotting to the train station. Most of the girls followed her.

I looked down to Sweetie Belle. “Welp, this went to shit.” Spike did one hell of a double take when he heard that. “Yeah, Spike, I’m Nav in Rarity’s body. Don’t ask. She’s in mine.”


“If Celestia summoned her, it’s for sex. A lot of it. I’ll see you when we get back. Sweetie Belle, do whatever. Taya, come on.”

“What about Rarity?” Sweetie called as Taya and I galloped to catch up to the group.

“Damn these legs, fuck not having wings, and screw this shitty body,” I panted as we ran. Taya didn’t answer. I think she was too preoccupied with trying to keep up. Thankfully, the train station wasn’t far from where we were. The rest of the girls were already waiting for us.

“C’mon, Rarity!” Dash somewhat testily said. “I knew I should have made you come with me to the gym.”

“Forgive me for taking the time to tell Sweetie what was going on and ask her to feed my cat, Rainbow. Next time I’ll just leave her behind with nary a word.”

“Sheesh, sooorry!”

I sighed. “I apologize, Rainbow. I was just so much looking forward to this week off. I’m sure whatever the princess is asking us to do is important, but I just wish I could spend some more time relaxing.”

“Well you don’t need to worry too much, Rarity,” Twilight said with a smile. “If all goes well, we should be back home in two days. And I don’t think this task will be that hard at all.”

“Well what is the job?” Applejack asked.

“The letter didn’t say,” Twilight answered, shrugging. “Just that we were to get on the train going to Detrot and go to the governor’s mansion when we got there. She promised that it wouldn’t be too taxing for anypony with our skills!”

“...Detrot?” I hesitantly asked.

Twilight nodded happily, not seeming to be concerned in the slightest. I shared a look with Applejack, probably the only member of the group that knew much of anything about the world. Pinkie looked excited, Fluttershy looked somewhat confused, and Rainbow Dash looked bored.

“Uh, Twi?” Applejack started. “Are we, uh... gonna have any kinda guards?”

“Of course not. Why would we need them?”

“Detrot has a bad reputation, dear,” I answered. “I’ve heard it’s one of the few places in mainland Equestria with any kind of noticeable crime rate.”

“Oh, I’m sure we’ll be fine! Now let’s all get aboard before the train leaves us behind.” Applejack and I shared one last worried glance before we all entered the train.

Our first look at the grand city of Detrot told me everything that I needed to know. The first word that came to my mind when I saw the outer layer of houses was empty. There were people there, but not many. I could tell that many of the houses hadn’t seen any manner of upkeep in some time. This might be just like Detroit.

I resolved to keep an eye on Fluttershy and Taya while we were there. The others could take care of themselves. If we were only supposed to be there for two or three days, there shouldn’t be any problems. But I’d rather not risk it.

“Taya, don’t go into town,” I told her in a quiet voice, trying not to let the others hear. “God, if I knew we were going to Detroit, I wouldn’t have brought you.”

“What’s so bad about this place?” she just as quietly asked.

“Crime. And a lot of it. If we’re going to be staying in the governor’s mansion, we will only leave that place in order to do whatever we’re here for and to go back to the train station.”

“I can protect you!”

“The best fight is the one you don’t have. There’s nothing in this place that I’m interested in, so we won’t risk anything. We can talk more later. That’s enough scheming for now.” She just shrugged and we went back to watching the necropolis slowly grow closer in the window.

When we got to the large and relatively opulent governor’s mansion, there was no time wasted: We were immediately ushered into a sitting room where the corpulent governor awaited, seated in a chair. A bodyguard stood behind him, to his right.

“It’s a pleasure to see you, ladies,” he said, not standing. The smile he was wearing didn’t reach his eyes. I swear I saw Applejack seem to flinch back from him, as though he had a physical presence that hurt her.

“Likewise, Governor Silver Dollar,” Twilight said with her diplomatic tone. “I’m Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia’s personal student. These are Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie—”

“Hi!” Pinkie shouted, bouncing in place.

“—Rarity, and Fluttershy. Oh, and that’s Taya. How can we help you?”

“Oh, I can think of a number of ways,” he answered, stroking his double chin with a hoof. “But Celestia sent you here as her representatives at an unveiling ceremony scheduled tomorrow. It will be the first time the Magiguard statue will be displayed for all to see!”

I think every single one of us in that room—aside from maybe Pinkie—was offended by that for a number of different reasons. Applejack facehooved. Fluttershy got a strange look on her face.

“We came all this way for a buckin’ statue?!” Rainbow Dash practically yelled. “I thought you said this was important, Twilight!”

Indiscreet as always... Twilight herself looked somewhat unhappy about being here over a fucking statue, but indecisiveness ruled her face. On one hand, Celestia said it was important. On the other hand, it was obviously just busy work.

The governor came to her rescue. “Oh, but it is important! Do you know, Miss Dash, who the Magiguard is?”

“Psh, no. It sounds stupid.”

“He is a guard that was almost killed in the line of duty. However, the medic mages we had were able to keep him alive, to rebuild him with magic. He is held together almost entirely by magical constructs. He was the first and only pony the procedure worked on. Since then, he’s made a big name for himself here in Detrot, stopping a number of criminals.”

“So we’re here for a stupid statue,” Rainbow Dash sighed. “And we can’t get out of it.”

“I’m sure Princess Celestia had a reason for sending us, girls!” Twilight hastily said, trying to keep morale up in her little group.

“It’s just two days,” I said. “Maybe a change of scenery will be nice. But I’m sure the governor has business he needs to attend to. If you could just have somepony show us to our rooms...?”

“Of course, of course... But I only have six rooms available. I was told to expect only six of you...”

“Taya will be staying with me,” I quickly said. All the girls looked to me in relative shock. “Well, it was my idea to bring her. I will take responsibility for her. It’s only fair.”

“Is that alright with you, Taya?” Twilight asked.

“I don’t mind,” she answered. “It’s just two days.”

They all shrugged. The fat fuck on the chair clopped two hooves together. A maid in an extremely skimpy outfit appeared at the door. “Take these mares to their rooms, please,” he ordered.

“Of course, Master,” she said, doing some approximation of a curtsy. I have got to get Doppel one of those outfits. I like those stockings. “Follow me, please,” she said, looking to us. We did so, leaving that room behind. I could feel his eyes on our backs as we left.

“Lecherous slimeball,” I whispered when we were far enough away.

“You feel it, too?” Applejack asked. “There’s something about that stallion... Felt like a kick to the gut as soon as he opened his mouth.”

“That’s not very nice to say about somepony you just met,” Pinkie said, looking at me. “Don’t you want to be his friend?”

“You are welcome to attempt to be his friend, Pinkie,” I said. “But I implore you not to make the attempt when alone with him.”

She sighed and looked away. “Okay...” We continued through the mansion in silence, the mood brought down by what Applejack and I said. For the record, the maid heard every word and didn’t say anything.

At least the rooms we were given were quite nice, if somewhat dark in themes. Taya and I had settled in to relax when there was a knock at my door. It opened, presumably by Taya’s magic. In walked Twilight. “Me and the girls were thinking about exploring the city. Do you two want to come?”

“I think I’d prefer to stay here,” I answered. “Something about this city makes me feel uneasy.”

“I’m staying,” Taya said.

Twilight sighed. “I guess it’s just me, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie... Applejack and Fluttershy don’t want to explore either.”

“Well have fun, Twilight. And do be safe. Maybe if you three don’t run into any trouble, I’ll join you tomorrow.”

“Alright. I’ll see you two in a few hours.” And so the door closed, leaving me and Taya alone.

“Now what?” she asked.

“We chill. Not much else to do. I refuse to leave this place without an armed escort and I’m not going anywhere near the sleazeball governor. Neither are you. So we’ll just chill here. Thankfully, this room has a bookcase. Let’s see what we’re left with...” I hopped off the rather expansive bed and walked over to the case, perusing the titles. Most of them were books that I had read before. After living four years in a library without being able to sleep, there weren’t that many books I hadn’t read.

“Anything good?” Taya asked.

“Well, unless you want me to read you a story, the only books here that I haven’t read are boring fucking history books. Plenty for you to read, I guess. Nothing here by me.” I lifted a hoof to grab one before I realized what I was doing. After sighing, I dropped my hoof and used magic to pull one of the books out, tossing it to the bed for Taya. “Have fun.”

“...Don’t you want to read to me?”

I looked back to her, relatively confused. “You actually want me to read to you?”

“Daddy, I know you. It’ll take you hours to remember to use magic to turn the pages. It’s either you read to me and I turn the pages or I read and you destroy a book and get angry.”

“Alright. I guess if anyone walks in, it’ll be easy enough to pawn off as Rarity being Rarity.” I walked back over to the bed and hopped on it. I curled up and looked at the book, trying to open it. Nothing happened.

Taya giggled. “Opening something is different from lifting, daddy. I’ll handle it. After I... Well, don’t move.” She started moving around the bed until she was right in front of me. I felt something in my horn and then felt my body being pushed. I didn’t really have much of a way to fight back as Taya pushed me to my side before lying down next to me, pushing her back against my stomach, essentially making her spoon me. “There. Now curl your tail up.”

“...What’s the point of this?” I asked as I moved my tail.

“To get comfortable, of course. Isn’t this nice?”

“Feels kind of awkward. I can’t even look you in your eyes.”

“Daddy, you almost never look anyone in the eyes anyway. Now let’s do this.” I felt that weird resonating feeling again as the book pulled over to us and opened up.

“Alright. Once upon a time...”

...I was very grateful for Taya’s company that night. Without Flo to guard my subconscious mind, the nightmares returned. There are some things that people just can’t face on their own, like it or not. I don’t think Taya was overly happy to be used as a teddy bear for the night, but she didn’t complain.

Taya and I were able to avoid leaving the mansion until the damn ceremony for the stupid statue the next day. Not that not leaving was necessarily a good thing, though; the governor was a pervert and the only reason we were spared his leering glances was because we stayed in our room. I had to comfort Fluttershy as she was propositioned by the guy and freaked the fuck out.

I shudder to think of what might have happened if Applejack hadn’t been with her when it happened. As it was, I think the only reason the governor didn’t get his shit kicked in was because of his bodyguard.

But anyway, the ceremony. The apparently famous guard himself ended up sitting next to me on the row of chairs behind the governor’s fat ass as he gave a speech that I didn’t pay attention to. I have to say, the guard looked very much like a pony version of Robocop.

“So how long have you been a guard?” I whispered to him.

“Three hundred years,” he quietly answered back.

Shit, man. I wonder how long that magic will sustain him... “What do you think of Detrot?”

“It’s a trashy city full of horrible ponies with a corrupt leader. I made it my life’s work to clean it up and I’m failing.”

“Oh... Have you heard of somepony named Sir Navarone?”

“Yes I have.”

“What do you think of him?”

“He’s a tool that thinks so highly of himself that he believes he’s above the law. If he ever sets hoof in this city, I will have him arrested immediately for several counts of murder, assault, blackmailing, sexual deviancy, foal neglect, public indecency, and anything else I can think of at the time.”

That was the end of that conversation.

Taya and I didn’t have much time to settle into our room back at the mansion before there was a knocking on our door again. Twilight poked her head in. “Taya, I just found out there’s an old magic aberration in this area! That spot would be an excellent place to teach you about magical vibrations. Let’s go!”

Taya looked to me, a conflict visible in her eyes. I nodded to her. “Go on, dear. I need to stay here in case Fluttershy needs me. I don’t want to risk her being alone.”

“Of course, Rarity,” Twilight said. “Come on, Taya. We need to leave soon or we might not have time to study much!” Taya hopped off the bed and trotted to the door. With a final backwards glance to me, they both left.

Five minutes after they departed, I hopped off the bed and walked to the door, opening it and going into the hall down to Fluttershy’s room. She really had been broken up and I was hoping she’d get better. I knocked on the door and didn’t get an answer. After a few seconds, I used magic to gently push it open. She was curled up on the bed, asleep. She wouldn’t mind seeing me when she woke up, so I let myself in and eased the door shut.

I spent some time reading before there was another knock. I opened the door with magic, though it seems this time it woke Fluttershy up. “There you are, Rarity!” Rainbow Dash said, smiling. “Me, Applejack, and Pinkie were about to go out. Pinkie actually managed to find a club that she thought would be interesting. You two wanna go?”

“Thank you, but no,” I calmly said. “I’m not much one for the ‘club’ scene. Fluttershy?”

“I... I think I wouldn’t mind going. As-as long as somepony stays with me.” Now that was shocking.

“Are you sure?” I asked.

“Really?” Dash said at the same time.

“I don’t want to be here,” she whispered, looking away.

“Well, if you’re sure...” I said. “By all means, have fun. I think it would do you some good.”

“You sure you want to stay here alone?” Dash asked, looking at me.

I smiled. “You underestimate me, Rainbow. If anypony tries anything on me, they will very sorely regret it. I’ll be fine. You girls go out, have a good time. I wouldn’t mind having some time to myself to relax.”

“If you say so. C’mon, Fluttershy. I’ll teach you how to dance!” I smiled at that image in my mind, the graceful Fluttershy pulling dance moves on a club floor. Out they went, leaving me alone in the mansion of the lecher.

Before I could help myself, I immediately thought of the phrase that has proven to be the bane of my existence: What’s the worst that could happen?

I found out half an hour later from the knocking on my door. I opened it with magic, hoping it would be Taya and Twilight, back from their expedition.

It was the governor. Oh boy, here we go.

“Ah, Governor Dollar!” I said, hopping off the bed. “What a surprise. How can I help you?” He let himself inside, squeezing his bulk around the door. His bodyguard followed him.

“Miss Rarity, has anypony ever told you that you were beautiful?” the fat fuck asked, grinning in a way he might have thought was charming.

“I’ve been told that before, yes,” I answered, having a bad feeling I knew what was coming.

“And I... I am a stallion with many connections, many friends,” he slowly said. I saw the bodyguard closing the door behind the governor, cutting off the only escape route that didn’t involve jumping out a window from the third floor. “I can make your life in Ponyville very easy. Or you could move here and be served anything you could desire.”

“You don’t say. Well this has been interesting, but—”

“Please, Rarity, you haven’t heard my offer.”

“I think I can make a guess as to what it is.”

“Give yourself to me and I’ll give you anything your heart could desire.”

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave,” I said, my tone dropping to ice cold.

“Please re—”

“I am not a harlot. I will not be treated like one.”

He snorted. “You aren’t? Not some tarted up whore? I have dirt on you, Rarity. Dirt that would ruin your name.” While he was talking, I looked over to a desk, where a maid had left a pitcher of water. When he said that last word, I used magic to propel the pitcher at him, drenching him.

“Get out!”

His eyes opened wide in surprise before narrowing. “You’re going to regret that. Guard, hold her down. She has enough holes for both of us.”

I have to say, I wasn’t expecting him to actually try raping me. But of course, I had planned for it. Sort of.

My horn grew hot and my vision dimmed as lightning shot out of my horn, slamming into the governor’s body and reacting with the water I splashed on him. He began screaming in pain as he was cooked. I felt a cruel smile coming to my face as blood started seeping from his eyes and brain matter leaked from his ears.

When I couldn’t hold the spell any longer, I let it go. The governor immediately collapsed, his blackened fur smoking and his body spasming in its death throes. I looked to his side to see what happened to the bodyguard that should have been caught in the chain effect of the lightning.

Where the bodyguard had been was a changeling lying on his stomach, immobilized. The spell I cast was supposed to just stun, but since the other guy was covered in water and because I poured so much hate into the spell, I think it reacted just a little stronger than it should have.

I walked over to the changeling and kicked him onto his back, putting my hoof on his throat. He looked up at me with the eyes of an intelligentsia, fear evident in his gaze. After some thinking, I said, “Intelligentsia, sentient, drone.”

His mouth dropped and his eyes widened. When he didn’t answer, I pressed down harder. “Urk! E-egg, larva, f-f-foal!”

I relieved some of the pressure. “What are you doing here, changeling?”

“S-spying on the governor!” His eyes darted to the corpse on the floor before darting back to me.

“I see. How many mares has he done this to?”

“Too many...”

“Interesting. And how does he never get caught?”

“S-soundproofed walls. And he has blackmail material on everypony!”

“Hm. How much of his staff is made of changelings?”

“Just me, I swear!”

“Excellent. I have a proposition for you, changeling. You see, having this body on my floor puts me in... somewhat of a bad situation. So what you are going to do is get rid of the body and then pretend to be the governor for one month before you return to your hive. And what I am going to do is not tell anyone that you’re a changeling and that you helped the governor rape ponies. Do we have a deal?”

“I-if I refuse?”

“Then I fear I’ll have even more of a mess to clean up. Changeling blood is hard to get out of carpets, after all.” I emphasized my position by pressing down more on his throat.

“Q-q-questions! I have questions!”

“Very well, bug. You may ask.” I relieved some of the pressure.

“Why a month? Why not just hide the body and leave?”

“Because it would be linked to this visit. A month gives the body time to rot and time for suspicion not to be on us.”

“What’s stopping you from betraying me, from telling on me anyway?”

“The reason I knew the spy’s code words.”

“Which is?” I narrowed my eyes and pushed down on his throat again. “N-n-never mind!” I eased back. “What if I stay as governor? If I don’t go back to the hive?”

“Then I go to Celestia. Your governor friend was an idiot. He seems to have forgotten that I am an element of harmony. I have the ear of the princess herself. If he had laid a hoof on me, he wouldn’t have lived long enough to regret it. If I find out that you’re still here after a month has passed, you will be ousted as a changeling, arrested, put on trial, and bad things will happen.”

“What if—”

I shut him up by pushing against his throat again. “Enough questions. Get this body out of my room and assume your position, governor.” I stepped off him, backing away. When I did so, I realized something that I’m glad I didn’t notice before: This bug had a small hard-on going. I blinked in surprise before grinning darkly. “Oh, does somepony get off to the idea of a big, strong mare dominating him? Holding him down and teaching him who’s boss, who swings the cock around?” The changeling’s face turned bright green as he blushed, averting his eyes. “I bet you’d love me to force you down and make you face-fuck me, wouldn’t you?” His breathing was starting to pick up. I snorted. “Well, you’d never please me with that tiny prick. I suggest you hide it before I decide to teach you what a real one is like. Now get out of my sight.”

He actually whimpered before rolling over, his tail between his legs to hide his shame. I glared at him the entire time he rolled the massive body into a carpet and began dragging it out, his small buggy erection flopping around until he turned into the bodyguard again. God, if only I had a strap-on... Soon enough, I was alone in the room, the smell of burned fur still hanging in the air. I opened the window with magic, hoping to air the room out some before Taya got back.

When she did get back, I couldn’t smell it anymore, but her face scrunched up. “What’s that horrible smell?” she asked, stepping into the room.

“Close the door. We might have a problem and it would be good for you to know what’s going on.” She did so, stepping further into the room. “First, don’t get mad.” She blinked in surprise. “Alright, the governor and his guard tried to rape me.” Her mouth fucking dropped. “I killed the governor.” It’s a good thing her mouth was already down, because it would have fallen again. “His guard was a changeling. I made an arrangement with him to ensure his silence and that the body wouldn’t be found.”

She stood there in shock for nearly thirty seconds before her mouth closed and her eyes narrowed, an expression that I was sadly getting used to. “I’m not leaving you alone again. You could have gotten hurt!”

“Yep. I’m not going to be in a room without someone I know until I turn back. The only reason I was able to do what I did was because I flung water at him before using that lightning spell you taught me. Also, I’m really tired. Is that an effect of spellcasting or something?”

“Magic is like a muscle. If you don’t use it often, it’ll be weak and using it will tire you out quickly. Rarity is used to using a lot of weaker magic, things that don’t exercise her magic. Using enough lightning to actually kill someone... You’re going to sleep well tonight, daddy.”

“Well that’s certainly good to hear. You think anyone would mind if I turned in early?”

“Daddy, the sun’s barely even gone down.”

“Like I give a fuck. I’m going to sleep. If you want, you can stay up and do magic things with Twilight. If she asks, just tell her that I was tired.”

“No, I’m not leaving you while you’re asleep. Not after both last night and what happened today.”

“I appreciate that, Taya. It... means a lot to me.”

“You guard my dreams, daddy. It’s only fair that I get to help guard yours.”

That actually made me feel more at ease. It didn’t do much to stop the nightmares, though.

Breakfast the next morning was somewhat awkward. Fluttershy refused to go anywhere near the governor or even look at him. Every time he looked at me, he quickly averted his gaze, blushing.

We left immediately after eating, not even bothering to say any goodbyes to anyone there. Every one of us wanted to get home quickly for some reason or another. Fluttershy, to feed her critters and to put the events behind her. Applejack, to reassure her family that she was okay. Dash needed to catch up on the job she left behind. I think Twilight really wanted to ask Celestia just what the hell she was thinking, sending us to a place like that.

And I wanted my motherfucking body back.

When we all got off the train, Fluttershy, Applejack, Taya, and I all started walking down the path out of town.

“You know that either of us could drop her off, right?” AJ said, looking at me.

“I’m aware,” I answered. “If Navarone is home, I would like to talk to him. He asked me to make something for him and I want to make sure I have a few details right before I begin.” And if he isn’t there, I’m going to strangle a certain white horse.

Applejack and Fluttershy split off on the paths to their homes while Taya and I continued on to my large fort. The place seemed too empty without anything in the yard or the naga around doing what he does.

However, the human body sitting in the armchair in the living room made the place feel alive enough for me. “Thank God, you’re here,” I sighed.

Rarity slowly turned her head to look at me. “Can we... talk?” she whispered.

“Sure. Taya, go make sure the circle thing in the cellar is still ready. Wait for us down there.”

“Are you sure, daddy?”

“Yes, Taya. I’ll be fine.” She cast a suspicious glare at Rarity before trotting to the kitchen. I slumped onto my couch, tired beyond all reason. Tired of having a pony body, tired of pretending to be Rarity, tired of bad sleep. “Welp,” I sighed.

“...So do you even want to judge this anymore?” Rarity asked, her entire body slumped into the chair.

“Doesn’t matter. I broke a few rules.”

“Me too... This was a horrid few days, Nav. I say we never speak of them again.”

“Before we agree to that, I want to know what happened. Hell, I’ll even tell you what I went through, if you’re interested.”

“I’d... rather not know, I think. Well, which rules did you break?”

“The no leaving Ponyville one. And then the no violence one. I electrocuted the shit out of someone. Blackmailed the witness into staying silent. You know how it is.”

“...I’d rather not know what happened. But given some of what I did and some of what I said, it’s only fair I tell you some things.”

“Oh God... What you ‘said’? Did you promise something?”

“Well, if a certain minty mare and changeling come by asking about that threesome I said you would join, feel free to thank me.”

I sighed, facehooving. “I don’t do anything with couples. God dammit, Rarity...”

“Well, how was I supposed to know that? From what I’ve seen, you don’t discriminate in any other ways!”


“...Fair enough. While we’re on this subject, I have something to tell you about a certain filly, Diamond Tiara.”

“She has an unrequited crush on me and a fetish for feeding me foods or giving me water tainted with her sex fluids. I already knew. What I’m more interested in is what happened after you got the note from Celestia.”

“Nav, if you knew that filly had a crush on you, why didn’t you do anything about it?”

“What am I supposed to do? Take her on a date? Shoot her down? Or God forbid, tell her father? It’s a childish crush brought on by greed, I imagine. She’ll get over it.”

“Very well. After these few days, I’m not going to pretend to know how to live your life for you.”

“Good. Now what happened?”

She sighed. “It all began when I got the letter from Spike...”

Spike held up the letter, panting. “Fresh from the princess, Nav!” he enthusiastically said, almost as happy as he was to serve you as he used to be me.

“Thank you, Spike. Any clue what it is?”

“No, but I know I have another one to deliver and she wants a response, so can you hurry it up?”

I shrugged—what is it with you and that motion, anyway?—and opened the letter with my fingers. Taya seemed to lean up, trying to read the letter from beside me. Given that it was from the princess to me—or you, I suppose—I didn’t let her get a look at it.

“Princess Celestia needs me?” I muttered after a moment. “But it doesn’t say what she needs.” Well, I’m sure I’ll have time to respond and find Navarone before transportation gets to me. “It just says to send the letter back if I can help her. So here you go, Spike.” I passed the letter back to him.

With a hot green flash, the letter disappeared, swirling away with a small foggy effect that I had never noticed before. “Now I just gotta find Twilight. Do you know where she is?”

I took a moment to look at the large clock tower before responding, “She’s probably at a picnic in the park right now. I need to talk to Rarity, so I’ll walk with y—Oh Celestia!” I had time to exclaim before being teleported to some unknown destination. “P-princess!” She was standing right in front of me, wearing a smile I don’t think I had ever seen on her before. “I... I thought you were going to send a chariot!”

Is it bad that the first thought in my head was that I just lost the competition for sure? That it didn’t even cross my mind what she wanted?

“Well, I was in a hurry,” she answered, slowly walking to me. When I had the peace of mind to look away and around, I saw that we were in some bedchamber I wasn’t familiar with. “I should be dealing with a small event right now... but I sent Twilight and her friends to deal with it instead. Twilight’s so easy to pawn my busy work on... Anything to please her teacher. And she gives even the most unimportant task I give her all of her thought. So useful.”

My mind almost froze at what she said. “B-busy work?”

“Of course. Can you believe I actually got her and her friends to take care of sending a dragon on his way some years ago? I could have done it in hours, but instead I pawned it off on her and her friends to take a nice long bath.”

She’s been using us! That... that whorse!

I opened my mouth to give her a piece of my mind, but when I did so, something slipped inside, her horn glowing. Whatever was inside my mouth wrapped around the back of my head, tightening and choking off my response. “Well, I needed another break,” she continued huskily, still smiling and drawing up close to me. I saw then that she wasn’t wearing her tiara, her shoes, or her necklace. My eyes widened as I had a realization and I looked down to see the ballgag in my mouth. “Yes, my little human... I think it’s time for another of our little trysts. After all, I still need some... heh, revenge for those pictures you gave to the newspaper.”

I knew I wasn’t a pony anymore, but I could practically feel my ears twitching in horror. I began backing away, trying to pull at the gag on my mouth to tell her no, that I wasn’t who she thought I was, that she didn’t want anything from me... but I tripped over a bed, falling down onto it.

“It’s only a shame that I didn’t think to get your gender stones... I’ve heard you picked up a thing for stallions. Oh well.” Her horn lit up brighter and I felt my shoes tug off, followed by my socks. I tried holding onto the pants, but she pulled my hands away like I was but a foal. When I shook my head, she stopped for a moment, pulling the gag away from me. “Is there a problem?”

I didn’t really want to tell her that I was Rarity and that she just said what she said about Twilight in front of me. And I couldn’t think of anything else to say... So I just went with the age-old excuse all mares have used at least once in their life. “I have a headache!”

Her smile deepened as the gag blocked my mouth again. “Good thing sex is a painkiller.”

Oh Celestia, why... My pants ripped off, revealing your shame for all the world to see. What happened next is...

Rarity broke out of her stupor. “It... I don’t think I can talk about it, Nav.”

“I’ve been through worse. Trust me when I say that the only way to get over it is to tell someone else. And really, who else are you gonna tell? Celestia’s the law of the land and everyone but me, Cadance, Shiny, and her sister think of her as a motherly ruler. And you, I guess. Going over it in detail is the only way to start getting over it.”

She was silent for almost a minute before she continued talking.

(Sex is coming up. If you want to skip it, ctrl+f “Sex is over”)

When she got my pants off, her smile turned wicked. “I’ve been needing this for a while now. I should have arranged it sooner.” Her horn lit up even brighter, like the sun she was so famous for, before it died off. In Celestia’s place stood a giantess, a human that would have stood around half a meter over me had we been standing. “Oh, I am going to enjoy ravishing you yet again.”

My impossibly wide eyes seemed to grow even wider as she forced my hands up, sliding the shirt off my body. Soon, I was entirely exposed to her groping eyes. She smirked at my attempts to cover myself with the blanket, her horn lighting up and holding me rigid. I still managed to flinch as I felt something caress a fleshy protrusion that I hadn’t until then been paying much attention to.

“I hope you don’t mind if we skip some of the frivolities. Normally I’d spend more time toying with you, but I really need it. And so, it seems, do you...” My eyes flicked down to my rising... ahem, member. Why are you betraying me? Stay down! I heard a faint giggling, but I don’t think Celestia’s mouth moved... The rest of her did, though, as she fell onto her knees on the bed, crawling on top of me and pinning my arms down as I tried to push her away.

“Isn’t this nice, Nav? Just you and me, on a bed, like old times. We haven’t done this nearly enough recently. Shall we let the games begin?” Before I could frantically shake my head, her hands let go of my arms and moved to my wings, each finger jamming onto an epicenter of pleasure, making my eyes roll back as I moaned into the gag. “Oh my, feeling vocal tonight? Maybe you’ll actually let me hear your pleasure for once.”

W-what? Is this what pegasi feel? As that thought left me, she lowered a certain other part of her anatomy onto me, molding her blooming flower bud onto my stem. I... I’m ashamed to admit that I might have blanked from the pleasure for a moment, the intense feelings of warmth and tightness sucking me in. The utter wrongness of the situation left me for a critical moment... And I forgot that I was being raped.

Celestia breathed in deep when we were connected. “Ooooh, I needed this,” she whispered, adjusting herself slightly, sending waves of pleasure through the organ holding us in place. Her fingers on my wings began pumping, adjusting the pressure on me constantly, bringing me to a higher state of arousal than I’d felt in years.

After a few seconds of grinding, she slid her hips up, making me moan at the pulling sensation I felt.

“I quite like-ohh-this new you! Keep those sexy little moans up, Nav.”

Why does everything I do turn her on!? I tried just closing my eyes and pretending it wasn’t happening, but as she continued riding me, I felt my hips slowly start moving in tune with hers! My hips are moving on their own! Once again, I heard the giggling in my head, but it didn’t sound like Celestia’s.

Before I could put any more thought into it, I felt Celestia grab one of my hands, still going at a pace that was driving me mad. I opened my eyes to see what new horrors she would force onto me, only to find her placing my hand on one of her rather generous teats that were almost at my face’s level. “Rub at the nipples,” she demanded, moving her hand back to my wings.

I... I was afraid of what she would do if I didn’t. Ignoring the horror and the growing wet pleasure between my legs, I used my fingers to rub at the soft nubs on her chest. She moaned so low I almost mistook it for a growl and it nearly made me stop.

Then I remembered that I was dealing with Princess Celestia of Equestria, who could turn me inside out if I didn’t give her what she demanded. I silently gulped down some of the drool that was forming in my mouth and tweaked at her nipples, rubbing them and occasionally pulling them. As I did that, her speed picked up and she began pounding at me harder, the pleasure in my mind building to some horrific crescendo.

Honestly, looking back, I don’t know how I held on as long as I did. I know about male virgins. Maybe it was the horror or maybe it’s different for humans, but I think I lasted maybe two minutes before both Celestia’s eyes and my eyes opened wide. A squeal of sorts escaped my mouth as my mind and member both exploded, coating her insides and thighs with sticky seed.

Celestia pulled away, pushing herself back so she could look down on me with her look of shock. “Already? I’m... disappointed in you, Nav.” She sniffed and rolled away from me. “Well, I suppose it happens to every stallion eventually.” I wanted to move, to pull the gag off and tell her the truth and beg for forgiveness, but I couldn’t do anything but lie there as the afterglow consumed me.

I’ll never question a stallion falling asleep after again... And I don’t think I’ll ever call a certain human a slut anymore, not if that is what stallions feel.

Celestia patted me on the arm. “I’ll go get cleaned up while you recover. Pawning that task off gave me a few days off... I hope you’re ready for a long week, Nav. I’ll give you plenty of chances to make up for this.”

My eyes shot open wide as I struggled to move, to do anything, but her horn lit up as she walked away and previously unseen ropes jerked my arms and legs down to the bed, holding me in place.

She just chuckled as she closed the door to the bathroom, leaving me to give up in silence, mentally readying myself for the worst few days I’ve had in a long, long time.

(“Sex is over”)

“I... I can’t say anymore, Nav. I just can’t.”


“Nav, is... is she always like that?”

“Not usually so demanding, no. And she usually lets me at least talk. I guess she wasn’t in the mood to hear it this time. Hey, at least Luna didn’t get you. God, if you had consented to anything with her, I’d be so pissed. And you’d probably be in pain.”

“So... you’re not mad?”

“A little disappointed that you got to have all the fun, but not mad. I just want my body back. You ready to go downstairs and get this over with?”

“My hips... ache. I’ll have to lean on you to walk down the stairs.”

“I’m okay with that.” I hopped off the couch and walked over to her, letting her pull on me to stand up. Together, we walked to the kitchen and down into the dark basement.

Thankfully, the circle was still drawn out on the floor, pristine as it had been when we left. All three of us walked to it, settling inside it. “Taya, if you would,” I said.

I felt a resonance in my horn that told me magic was being cast nearby. A second later, I found myself in a much smaller body. I sagged, finding that I was now in Taya. If I had to guess, I’d say that she was in me and Rarity was in her body.

“Finally!” Rarity yelled before flinching. “Sweet Celestia am I tired...”

“And not done,” I said. “I’m in Taya’s body. Try again.”

Rarity rolled her eyes and started magicking. Soon enough, I was in the correct body. “Thank God. You two sort it out.” I backed out of the circle, flinching at the pain, and let Rarity’s body cast the spell a final time. “Alright, so it’s settled. We never speak of this again.”

“Agreed,” Rarity answered with a nod. “Now, I think I need to go home and go to bed...”

“Before you leave, I do have a question. What would your order have been, had you won?”

She yawned, tears coming to her eyes. “Simple. A date with Fluttershy. I’ll see you both later.” And with that, she began walking out.

I looked down at the conjuration circle on the floor. “This needs to get gone before the naga gets back. Is it safe for Doppel to fuck with?”

“She’ll be fine,” Taya answered. “But it’s just chalk. We could splash some water on it to get it gone.”

“Hm...” I snatched Taya off the ground and jumped into the pool with her. I had a feeling that after Celestia toyed with my body, I needed a bath anyway. Taya just sighed exasperatedly when we both surfaced.

“You could have stopped it, you know,” I said to Flo that night, chilling in my calm dreamscape. “Rarity getting raped, I mean. You could have warned her what would have happened if she agreed or you could have stepped in when she got there with the right words.”

“I could have. And I could have pulled her into the center, too, so it wouldn’t have been as traumatic. I know what you think of me, Navarone. That I’m inhuman, that I’m above many petty emotions and desires. Like love or hate... or revenge. Yes, I could have helped Rarity. But I think there are many that would say she got what was coming to her. Would you disagree?”

“Hm...” Mercy or justice? After so long in such a peaceful world, it’s hard to decide which is better anymore. Or if something is even a mercy or a justice. “What’s done is done.”

“I know you feel a sense of satisfaction, Navarone. You can’t hide it from me.”

“That doesn’t mean it was right... but it was fitting. Perhaps even fair. Not like it matters anymore. Forget I brought it up.”

“Very well. I feel I should warn you, though... Celestia now thinks you have a fetish for being spanked.”

“...She’s free to try it, but I can guarantee she’ll be the one with the red ass when I get finished.”

“If you say so. Shall we go exploring the dreamscape? I’m sure Luna might be wondering where we went off to.”

“Sure. Not like there’s much else to do. Maybe I can haunt Rarity’s dreams and make her suffer for the threesome I apparently agreed to...”

The next day, I got a somewhat unpleasant surprise of the five wolves showing up in my lawn variety. I was busy minding my own business when Doppel flew up outside the window of the room I was in and slammed against the window, just like a bug. She did that a few more times before I could open it and let her in.

“Yes, Doppel?” I asked, bemused.

She pointed out the window. “We have company.”

I looked out, wondering what kind of company would require her buzzing up to my window instead of walking to my room like a civilized person. When I saw the five wolves standing in a semicircle a few meters from my house, my bemusement disappeared. “I see. Go get Freki.”

“Yes, master,” she hastily said, having seen the look on my face. I grabbed my sword as she was leaving and buckled it on. I didn’t expect to need it, but I didn’t want to take any chances. The armor stayed where it was, because I didn’t want them to think I was going for any kind of hostility.

When I got into the hall, Freki and Doppel were just about at my door. “Come on,” I said, walking down the stairs. They both followed me as I headed back out. “Freki, your family is here,” I said as we walked.

He didn’t make any kind of reply. I opened the door in silence, leading the way out. Doppel closed it behind the two of us, not joining us outside. To be fair, if it did turn violent, she probably would have just gotten in the way.

Freki and I stopped a few meters in front of the wolves and I just crossed my arms, watching them. After a few seconds of waiting, the one in the center stepped forward. “We have come to reclaim what is ours,” it slowly said in a raspy, halting voice.

“One moment.” I knelt down next to Freki. “I can’t take you with me when I leave,” I said. “And this is your family. So you need to go with them. Alright?”

He seemed to sigh, shaking his body slightly.

“I have no idea what that means. But you really can’t stay with me. I know you feel bad when you stay too long in Ponyville. Well, I’m going considerably farther away than Ponyville, soon. You would—” He started walking away, toward the pack. “What are you—” When he got next to them, they all began bounding toward the gate, running off. “...Huh.” Well fine, be that way. I didn’t want to say goodbye anyway…

“He’s a wolf made of wood, Nav,” Flo said. “He honestly doesn’t have much in the way of feelings or a personality at all. And it doesn’t help that you didn’t spend much time with him.”

“Yeah. I don’t know. It just seems like he could still be useful.”

“As a guard dog, nothing more. If his choice is staying with you and being nothing more than a guard or going with his family and… well, being with his family, which would you prefer he take?”

“The one that’s useful to me. But it’s probably for the best,” I said, standing back up and starting to walk back to the door.

“Probably nothing,” Flo said. “It is for the best.”

“Fair enough,” I said at the door, my hand on the handle. That said, though, I couldn’t help but look back, just once. When I did, I heard a low howling, but didn’t see any of them lingering. “For the best…”

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