LOST: Echoes of a lost love (A Suliet fanfic)

Set during the events of "The Incident" at the Swan worksite. Sawyer sacrifices himself so he can set off the explosive to reset time. Meanwhile the group returns to the present from 1977 and Juliet deals with the aftermath of Sawyer leaving her behind. *This is AU.*


12. 'It's just a storm'

The crashing waves against the rocks had woken her. She tried to drown out the noise of the waves and the lightning just outside her tent by placing the pillow over her head. Her left hand made its way to her belly, which she felt if it got any bigger it would explode. She felt tiny feet doing their dance below her hand, although a bit frantic.

“It’s just a storm sweetie. It’ll pass. Mommy is right here. I’ll keep talking to you until you fall back asleep ok?”

The tiny pitter-patter of feet against Juliet’s belly made her smile. She wished James were here to share this moment with her. It saddened her to think that James would never be there for their daughter as she grew up. He’d miss her first smile, learning to crawl, learning to stand and then walk, her first words, the first day of school, first boyfriend, going to college if she chose, and giving her away on her wedding day. Juliet tried not to think about those things, but the more she thought about them, the more they haunted her.

“You’re going to love Miami Cara. It’s warm year round, they have dolphins and when you’re old enough I’m going to take you to Disney World. I can’t wait for you to meet your Aunt Rachel and your cousin Julian.”

She sighed when the movement in her belly settled. Fifteen minutes later, she felt a sharp pain. Thinking that it was only Cara’s tiny feet doing its little dance again, she patted her stomach to try and get her daughter to settle.

“Cara, baby girl, it’s time for bed now. Mommy is really tired.”

Juliet waited for a few minutes to see if the pain returned. When it hadn’t, she carefully turned back onto her side and closed her eyes. Cara settled once more and she sighed as she relaxed her whole body. There wasn’t a position that was very comfortable for her to lie in these days, but she found that lying on her side and placing another blanket between her legs as a cushion helped. She kept seeing the lightening behind the pillow flashing every now and then, but, at least, the thunder was dying down. The storm is finally passing. She found herself dreaming of James as she fell into a semi-restful slumber.

“Come on blondie! We’re going to miss our ride home!”

She could see the huge ship in the distance. A navy ship of all things. How they’d found all of them was beyond her. Juliet had been packing her bags all day long and it made her smile to think that now she was going to leave this godforsaken rock. It meant their daughter would be born in a hospital on the mainland.

A sharp pain suddenly woke her and she looked around her shelter trying to pinpoint where she was exactly until she remembered she was still on the island. This sharp pain was much like the first one, but this one was stronger. Juliet noticed it was daylight now and she knew the best course of action was to call for Jack. Slowly climbing to her feet she exited her tent. She saw Jack was out of his shelter a couple of tents down filling up his water bottle from his water trough. He looked up when he saw her approaching.

“Juliet? How’d you sleep last night? Some storm we had.”

Nodding Juliet finally made her way over to the water trough.

“Actually, I slept pretty well after Cara decided to stop using my bladder as a soccer ball. Truth is, I had a contraction last night but it went away. I haven’t had anymore until this morning. I had one about 10 minutes ago.”

Jack frowned and set his water bottle down on the sandy ground next to the trough.

“How many contractions have you had Juliet?”

Juliet wrung her hands nervously but looked Jack straight in the eye.

“Two so far. God Jack, they were horrible. I’m surprised you didn’t hear me screaming last night with the first one.”

Jack watched Juliet’s movements for a moment and saw her reaction deep within her blue eyes, even though she kept her cool mask on.

“Ok, since you’ve only had two, we have a little time. But we do need to get you to the medical station and onto monitors. The beach is no place for you to give birth.”

But of course, Jack was stating the obvious. Of course, I’m not giving birth on the beach. Or in the jungle for that fact. Could she really do this alone? She was suddenly scared of going through labor alone. What if she couldn’t do this? Jack could see the fear just below the surface.

“Juliet, everything is going to be just fine. I will be there with you the whole time. Ok?”

Jack’s words didn’t seem to lift her into a state of confidence, still, she nodded her head in agreement anyways. After everything that had happened to her over the last nine months, Juliet knew that Jack would never let anything bad happen to her.

“As long as you can assure me Jack that Cara will be healthy.”

Jack paused at the edge of the tree line and steadied Juliet when she tripped over a tree root.

“I know you're nervous but it’s ok, you’re not alone.”

A watery smile graced Juliet’s lips.

“No, Cara and I have each other. I was hoping we’d be off this island by now and I’d be giving birth to her in a hospital.”

The wind suddenly began to pick up and Juliet for a moment watched as the palm fronds on the ground moved with the gusts. Driving rain began to fall on their heads as the sky opened up, and with a loud clap of thunder, accompanied with a flash or two of lightning, a storm came rolling in. Worse than the one from the night before. Jack was gentle but tried to hurry Juliet along. By the time they reach the medical station and climbing inside the hatch doors, the two were soaking wet. Just as they got to the hidden room behind the lockers, Juliet wrapped her hands around the frame of the bed and held on tight. A contraction making its way through her. Jack could tell she was having difficulty breathing.

“Juliet look at me. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. There you go, that’s it.”

She gritted her teeth as the contraction came to a head, this wasn’t working.

“Oh god it hurts!”

Jack put a wet hand on her shoulder and gave it a light squeeze.

“When this contraction is over, what do you say we get you into something dry?”

Juliet heard Jack, but she was too busy focusing on the pain shooting from her abdomen. She felt a hand grip hers, making her look up. Throwing a tearful sigh at James, she blew out a breath.

“Glad you could make it James. I was thinking I had to do this alone.”

James gave Juliet a dimpled smile and shook his head, chuckling as he did so.

“Are you kiddin’ me blondie? I wouldn’t miss this for the world.”

As the contraction wound down, Juliet sighed in relief and took a moment or two to breathe. Her soaking wet clothes were now sticking to 
her like glue. What she needed was a towel to dry off and some clean clothes. But she knew that she’d have to put a gown on. As Juliet peeled her clothes off Sawyer smirked.

“I still say you got a cute baby belly their blondie. Yer too hard on yourself.”

Rolling her eyes, Juliet threw her shirt at James and he ducked to avoid being hit with the soggy garment. Juliet now noticed that James was staring at a long and thin scar that was very close to her right hipbone. She suddenly felt very self-conscious and wrapped her arms around herself. James ran a thumb over her wet skin.

“It was a long time ago… A man broke into my house one night and I was stabbed before I could call 9-1-1. I was lucky I lived through it. I pressed charges against the man and he’s still sitting in a jail back in Miami. Serving only a 12-year jail sentence if you can believe that.”

James frowned and helped her into her gown.

“I woulda given him a piece of my mind blondie. He had no right to hurt ya the way he did…”

Juliet only sighed as she climbed into bed. Jack only smiled, but she could see the pity in his eyes.

“I know you miss James, Juliet. It’s perfectly natural. I’m just going to put this iv in ok? You’re going to feel a little pinch for a minute…”

Bracing herself, Juliet looked to the swell of her very pregnant belly and placed a tender hand there. Nodding, she stroked her belly and spoke.

“Please don’t hurt mommy on the way out.”

Jack put a hand on Juliet’s and gave it a squeeze.

“Everything’s going to be just fine Juliet. I’m right here and I won’t let anything happen to either of you. Ok?”

Nodding, Juliet pulled the sheet over her and watched the monitor to the left of her. The band around her stomach was monitoring the baby’s vitals.

“I owe you a big debt of gratitude Jack. You saved our lives. Without my serum, I’d be dead right now. Look I know I discussed with you that I wanted to try a drug-free approach to this, but I’m not retracting my decision to actually have an epidural. I do want one.”

Turning her attention back to James, Juliet sighed, content that he was there. She knew Jack would point a finger at her and say she was delusional, but she didn’t care. Perhaps she could prove to him that he was actually in the room with them? Jack had to believe first.

“You are so beautiful blondie. That baby in your belly is gonna come out just fine. She’ll be healthy. I promise I won’t leave until I’ve seen her come out of ya. Ok?”

Juliet gave a tearful nod and gripped James’ hand once more as a contraction showed itself searing and white hot.

“I can’t do this without you, James. Please don’t go.”

Jack heard the desperation in Juliet’s voice, and the pity he held for her crept back into his voice. She needed reassurance.

“Just bear down and blow through the pain, Juliet. Just try and relax.”

Juliet glared at him as the contraction came to its peak. Blowing through the last of the pain, her head whipped around as the machine next to her head began beeping loudly.

“What’s wrong?”

Jack only squeezed her hand and checked the monitors. Pulling the sheet back to expose her semi-bare stomach, he readjusted the band around it.

“Just relax, everything’s ok. The band just slipped and it wasn’t registering the baby’s heart rate correctly. See? Above 80. Perfectly normal.”

Taking a breath, Juliet watched the monitors again and smiled.

“I just want her to be ok Jack. I don’t have anybody else…”

Jack could hear her voice crack in the last part of her sentence.

“You have all of us back at camp Juliet. You won’t be alone. I promise.”

Juliet put on a brave face and continued watching the monitors.

“Can I have that epidural yet?”

Jack shook his head sympathetically and scooted the stool closer to her, handed her a towel to dry her hair.

“Not yet. You’re only at 4 centimeters. Two more to go.”

Juliet groaned and placed an arm over her face. Jack could see that she was cold and handed her a blanket.

“I never used to think this would be so hard. But I’ve never been in the driver’s seat for this. Never on the receiving end.”

Putting a hand on her left one, Jack shook his head.

“No one woman ever knows what it’ll be like to give birth until they’ve experienced it for themselves. Even then, the experience for each is different. No one is the same, Juliet. Remember that.”

The island had taken away a lot of things over the years, Juliet knew that. She rested her hands on her belly. Her daughter was her only hope 
of getting off this island. A contraction began to pick up again and Juliet braced herself. The nasal cannula didn’t seem to be helping any, even though it was providing the much-needed oxygen she needed. She noticed this contraction was lasting much longer than the others she’d had previously. Watching the monitors, she blew through the pain and started to count in her head. One: Cara is going to be just fine. Two: If Rachel were here she would support you in every way. Three: You know all the ins and outs of labor; you can do this. Four: Jack is going to help you every step of the way. Five: Cara is going to be healthy. Six: James would be so proud of you. Seven: Where’s that epidural!? Eight: You’re not alone. Nine: You’re going to get off this island. Ten: Cara is going to look like her daddy. Eleven: You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. Twelve: You have nothing to worry about. Thirteen: You’ll get to meet Julian. Eventually. She was suddenly interrupted when Jack sat down on the stool in front of her.

“Just keep breathing Juliet. I’m just going to check really quick and see where we’re at.”

Distracting herself, Juliet looked up at the ceiling and tried to block out the pain.

“Are we at six yet Jack? I’m ready for that epidural anytime now.”

Jack pulled the sheet back down over her legs and raised his eyebrows.

“Actually, you're already at 9. I could give you the epidural, but I don’t know how long it’ll be before the next contraction.”

Juliet nodded and turned onto her side. Grabbing for the metal railing on the side of the bed, she held on.

“Ok, let’s get this show on the road then.”

Staring at a crack in the wall, Juliet tried not to tense her muscles as Jack inserted the local into her lower back. As he was about to insert the 
epidural into her lower back, he felt the mood in the room change. Looking over at Juliet, he noticed her face was pale and she was taking slow, shallow breaths.

“Juliet, tell me what’s going on?”

Opening her eyes, Juliet swallowed and then spoke.

“I don’t feel so good. Something doesn’t feel right Jack.”

Carefully placing the epidural, Jack resumed his seat in front of Juliet. Pushing back the sheet covering her legs, he frowned.

“Whoa! Looks like someone wants to come out feet first!”

Juliet attempted to sit up, but Jack put a hand on her knee.

“Let me see.”

Jack shook his head and kept his hand on her knee.

“Juliet, I need you to lie back and relax. Just keep breathing ok?”

Blinking back tears, Juliet looked up at the ceiling. She felt hands behind her back. Looking to her left, she found James had appeared again. 
She became angry with him.

“Where’d you go James!? Where were you when I needed you!? Huh? Now that you’re here, don’t go anywhere.”

Jack thought he saw a figure from the corner of his eye, but thought nothing of it, and tried to calm Juliet.

“Juliet, I need you to stay calm. Relax and keep breathing.”

Nodding again, Juliet plopped her head back against the pillow and grabbed for James’ hands, gripping them with all the strength she could 
muster. She groaned but kept her attention on James who was doing his best to keep encouraging her.

“Just relax sweetheart. The doc’s got everything under control. Keep your eyes on me ok? I’m not gonna let anything happen to you or Cara. Ok?”

She gasped when she felt like a weight had left her. Tearing her eyes away from James, she averted them to Jack.

“Is she out Jack?”

All Juliet could see of Jack was his shoulders, and they were slumped. She strained to hear his response.

“No. Not yet. But there’s a lot of oozing here. You have an abruption Juliet. I can get Cara out, but you’ll have to go into surgery afterwards.”

Juliet swallowed. Nodding bravely, she put in her two cents worth.

“Ok get Cara out. Then let me walk you through the surgery.”

Jack frowned and looked up for a brief second.

“How exactly are you going to do that Juliet? You’ll be on your back with my hands inside your uterus.”

Juliet wanted to laugh.

“Jack, you gave me that same speech right before I took your appendix out. Remember?”

Jack nodded and turned his attention back to bringing Cara out into the world.

“You’ll feel a little tugging here Juliet. Don’t push.”

Juliet stared into James’ eyes and got lost in them. Fifteen minutes later, she heard Jack call out to her.

“I’ve got her Juliet!”

A smile graced her lips and then suddenly disappeared.

“Jack, she’s purple. Why isn’t she crying?”

Juliet held her breath as Jack cleaned out Cara’s nose and mouth. A few seconds later, a cry accompanied the silence. Jack swallowed. He was 
just as nervous.

“Give her a minute to catch her breath.”

Juliet let the breath she’d been holding out and watched her baby girl cry. As each minute passed they grew stronger. Her coloring was 
improving and she was now a reddish-pink color.

“Can I hold her now Jack?”

Jack wouldn’t deny Juliet her child. This labor and delivery had been difficult for the both of them. Placing the squalling baby girl on Juliet’s stomach, Jack gave her a minute.

“Hello baby girl. I’m your mommy.”

Sawyer leaned over and brushed a light hand over the tiny baby’s surprisingly full head of blond hair.

“Well, would ya look at that; looks like someone’s already got her daddy’s dimples.”

Juliet was glad now that there was a barrier separating her and Jack’s operating field. It was different when she was the one cutting through skin and muscle to save a child’s life. She found it a little unsettling. At least since it was happening to her. Swallowing, Juliet put on a brave face and turned her emotions off. Professional mask on, she gave Jack directions.

“Be sure you make the incision at the midline Jack. You have a lot to cut through, including muscle.”

She wasn’t sure why she winced, it was just a knee-jerk reaction. Jack noticed and paused.

“You want some more local Juliet?”

Swallowing again, Juliet shook her head no and distracted herself with staring at the ceiling above her.

“No, I’m alright. What’s it look like in there Jack?”

Juliet struggled to see around the barrier separating her exposed and open stomach. She grew nervous as Jack hesitated for a moment.

“It’s really boggy in here. Blood’s flowing pretty badly. I’ll get everything under control Juliet. You have my word.”

The cold air on her exposed insides was making her cold, but Juliet held in a shiver and kept staring at the ceiling. Her eyes were getting 
heavy, maybe it was best if she was asleep for this. Darkness soon surrounded her.

The first thing she woke to was pain, and at first she couldn’t see anything. A pit formed in her stomach. Then she felt someone’s hands removing something from her eyes. A blurry form appeared before her eyes and she could make out that it was Jack.

“Juliet, how are you feeling?”

Her throat was scratchy and dry. Clearing it, she tried sitting up, but Jack put a hand on her to lie back.

“Like I went 50 rounds with the Black Smoke and lost.”

She squinted as Jack shined a penlight in her eyes.

“You just need a few days’ rest. Don’t worry, I put everything back where it belongs. Everything went well, I managed to stop the bleeding and yes to answer your question: your uterus is intact. If by chance you meet another man you can have more children.”

Juliet took a minute to chew on what Jack said.

“That’s… That’s good news.”

Her blurry vision was now beginning to clear and her eyes landed on the plastic basinet next to the bed.

“That shot of morphine should be kicking in pretty soon.”

Juliet’s hand landed on the plastic basinet and she shook her head no.

“Jack I’m breastfeeding. How am I supposed to feed her with all these drugs in my system?”

Jack averted his eyes towards Cara who was beginning to squirm inside the basinet.

“We can supplement until you are feeling better. She’s not going to know the difference.”

Juliet watched a squirming Cara inside the basinet.

“Jack I owe you our lives. Thank-you.”

Jack nodded his head and reached a finger into the basinet.

“Cara is a strong testament that this island can’t control everything. She’s a miracle.”



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