My life as an openly transgender man has not been easy. Everyone has been hard on me, but the person I get the most judgement from is myself: the person that judges me silently in the mirror.


1. Untitled

I think my mirror is lying to me.

It's showing me nothing, but lies.

Honestly, who does it think it's fooling?

Showing me a girl with large breasts and rounded hips...

A girl with large breasts and rounded hips?

C'mon, I know better than that.


I know I'm not a girl in any way shape or form.

I know my voice might be a little too high for a boy,

and my face a little too soft

and eyes a little too big

and my lips a little too thick

and my butt a little too wide

and my...


I'm not a girl!

And I'll battle any evidence my mirror might have.

What does it know anyways?

It doesn't know how sad I feel when it shows me these things.

It doesn't know how much I try to cover myself up after seeing all that.

It doesn't realize that it's the reason I can't be comfortable in my own skin.

It's like it's trying to hurt me.

What did I ever do to it?

I haven't done anything, but try to be happy.


Ignoring all these things it's showing me...

That's the only way I've found some happiness.

Ignoring everything everyone says about my body.

They're liars, too. They also hurt me.

Who knows if they do it on purpose or if they're being tricked by the mirror, too.


I've tried for years to tell the mirrors to stop.

But, they won't.

When I was fourteen, things got even worse actually.

They started showing me womanly curves.

It's been twenty years.

They've been lying to me for twenty years

and I feel like they're never going to stop.


I think I've finally had it though.

I'm going to prove them wrong.

I'm going to prove them all wrong.


Maybe one day they'll see how much they hurt me.

Maybe one day they'll stop lying.


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