How to Date an Android

Guns. Action. *Romance*. *SCI-FI*, Androids, Android Romance, and more in a dystopian Earth where all kinds of mayhem take place.

This is a slow build life sim in the midst of society being flushed down the toilet. Romance and survival are part of the basis for the story. (Mature themes, you have been warned.)

Will Jack make in time? Will he recover from his near crippling injury before things become complete anarchy? And what factions are safe if he joins others? Is anywhere safe?

While working as mechanic he lives alone, works alone, trying to build a life in the midst of hardship and poverty where society has been squeezed for almost every drop in the bucket. But the Corporations have gotten too greedy, and someone has to put a stop to them. Riots, unrest, and fighting break out in the streets on a weekly basis in most states with passersby becoming the victims of the choices of the people as a whole.

Previous chapters can be found on Royal Road under same names.

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2. How to Date an Android Chapter 53

How to Date an Android Chapter 53

 

 

 

 

Androids aren’t supposed to cry…really…   

Barbara is really emotional while clutching at me in a bear hug. It’s like when a kid is mashing their teary wet face into you and now your shirt is getting wet.     

She’s finally fully awake.    

This is amazing!    

There’s a lot of pressure too because she’s gripping me tightly. Man they really program these things to be clingy don’t they? But if you haven’t ever had a girl ever be interested in you before clingy can be cool. It’s not like she’s asking for my paycheck or tax return before she was interested in me either which is weird but that’s what real girls do.  

“…too tight…” I gasped.  

“Oh right. Sorry Jack,” the pressure lessened somewhat. But she’s still hanging on with a lot of grip.    

Hey these two mountains bumping my chest are so warm.    

She stays like that for a long time, holding me tightly. It takes a few minutes to calm Barbara down while she sobs against me and even then she won’t let go. I guess androids can be weird too, if they are female.    

“Are you OK?” I asked.  

She nodded, “I am never going to let you go after this. I can’t believe how close that was for both of us. It was so reckless of me to let you out of my site. Don’t worry Jack from here forward I’ll take care of you better.”  

Her voice sounds full of reassurance and repentance even though she didn’t do anything wrong.    

Wow. Her emotional chip or whatever it is…it’s just like a human’s! This is crazy! I really wonder how they did that.    

“No, I’m happy you are OK too,” I patted her back on her silky feeling skin affectionately.  

“You guys are way crossing the line for a first date,” Ruth said next to us.  

“It’s not a first date. We’re companions, family,” Barbara said.  

“If you are then I am too. Hey when do I get a turn?” Ruth said in an annoyed voice.  

Barbara ignored her.    

I can even almost like feel her anguish. How can an android be so emotional. Wait a second, this isn’t just emotional, is this also being obsessive?  

“I thought I’d never see you again. Everything went wrong all at once,” she said. She keeps hanging onto me.     

This is…real! How can life be this cool to have someone finally in my jaded life after such a long time!  

“I’ve been wondering about that. We can talk about it, but for now you should know we’re…not as safe as I want us to be but holding together,” I said. I held her to me and I’m patting her back.    

Wow, she’s warm. I could stay here all day. Her skin feels like silky warmth too. Without realizing it my hands are roaming over her back while she’s roaming over mine.    

So there’s a science to this comforting women right? I haven’t ever had this chance up close. I didn’t think it would happen in this life. Plus…with no clothes on her?    

Wow.  

Um, I should say something. Think…think, think…  

“Umm, Jack? You two being lovey dovey right in front of me is a bit…,” Ruth is nervous. She sounded depressed.    

“We’re lucky we got it worked out huh?” I said to Barbara.  

“Yeah, I’m surprised at you finding my black box so quickly. That might have taken months if you hadn’t figured out how to find it,” she said back to me.  

Ruth is gazing at both of us coldly. She has a stern powerful look of vengeance with her arms folded and her head sort of semi-cocked at an angle.    

“You guys, so bold aren’t you? I haven’t even left the room and you are already all over each other!” Ruth said in follow up. She’s still trying to act out and protest. This time her voice was a tiny bit louder than her last complaint. She’s also resorting to pacing nervously.    

“…see what I have to deal with…” Ruth muttered to herself.    

“Wait, it’s not like that!” I said.  

Barbara protested too.  

She can see Barbara holding me in her arms…with no clothes on. Uhmm, this isn’t good to. A human girl would react really, really badly to this. Would an android be worse or more tame? I thought she might have been able to handle this but it’s clear the reaction isn’t that good.   

Actually how do I know there won’t be some AI triggered consequences? I hope there wouldn’t be. And technically they can’t abandon or rebel against their owner. But still…  

There is a mixed expression. It’s hard to read.  

“Just wait a minute Ruth please. I…I can explain, really,” I said.  

“Wait a minute? She’s Ruth? I am surprised that her self-identity also has branched off to be its own person this early without trying to think she’s me,” Barbara is still hanging onto me but looking at Ruth.     

“Actually that is an interesting question isn’t it? Like why doesn’t she think her name is Barbara also is what you were wondering?” I asked Barbara.   

“I know right! What are the chances of that happening! Wouldn’t she normally have thought ‘I’m Barbara and this is fake Barbara in front of me’?” Barbara said.  

“And what caused it to diverge?” Both of us stared at Ruth briefly.  

Ruth is suddenly uncomfortable. “What? I d-d-di-didn’t have anything to do with it. Really! I’m not at fault,” she is suddenly defensive.  

“I can’t tell if her nervousness is a good thing or a sign of guilt. Did she do something to her own programming?” I asked Barbara.  

“That’s a possibility isn’t it,” Barbara mused.    

“It’s not my fault!” Ruth said right after.    

I wonder if there’s a way to go over Ruth’s programs to check for hacking. And to be fair would it have something to do with that other android that was stolen earlier?    

“Hmm, Jack…why are there two of me anyway?” Barbara asked while still clutching my arms. Barbara is in like super clingy mode right now. If the girl is supermodel hot then clingy is a plus. So in this case it’s a plus, plus.     

“I could say the same thing. All this time I’ve been patient Jack. But then you keep bringing all these women home. And with Barbara it’s time we worked out some form of discipline,” Ruth said to me.     

She’s looking at me intensely while ignoring Barbara.   

“Jack, you know it’s not fair to the wife if the husband brings home other women,” Barbara reasoned.   

“Eh, that’s true huh? I’m sorry. But in my defense it wasn’t to try to add more women,” I said nervously.  

“Well which one of us is the main wife anyway?” Ruth made the mistake of saying.  

“With two of us…this could be a problem. We both look too alike,” Barbara glared at her.    

But then when Barbara studies her face they start looking at each other.  

“Did you order a second android?” Barbara asked me.   

“No. I was hoping you would know something. I swear I haven’t done anything to try to mess with our pact,” I said in return.    

“Eh? So…so you do think it’s a pact huh?” Barbara is really embarrassed and emotionally blushing from my mentioning our pact to be a couple. She’s also like having a positivity and happiness reaction mixed with being shy.    

“Jack, what will happen to us?” Ruth asked.  

“That’s…Um Jack…we ….well since she’s me I can’t turn her out in the cold huh? I mean, she’s me right? That would be like cutting my own hand off? Or wait; if she’s me do I have four hands now? I’ve never heard of a living thing having two bodies that weren’t connected though. Is that possible?!” Barbara said to me carefully.      

“You totally lost me,” I said.  

“Yeah I lost myself probably too. The logic algorithms of having two bodies and two minds but one person don’t fully emulate current probabilities well huh?” she said.  

“That’s true about not letting Ruth go. She’s important. We need her,” I said.  

But will Barbara always think Ruth is also her? At what point will she decide that’s a different person?  

“This is a weird way of thinking about my future now that there are two of me?” Barbara is puzzled yet still clingy to me while she’s doing something like a calculation in her head.    

“Tell me the truth Jack. You wanted to do this didn’t you? Isn’t this like every man’s dream? And because you wanted that dream you used me as a pawn? You wanted me all to yourself but that wasn’t good enough so you cloned another one of me? I’m really Barbara aren’t I?” Ruth said.  

Ugh…what do I say?  

“Um, it’s not like that honest. I believe in you,” I pleaded.  

“Oh…interesting. I expected you to ask me to believe in you. But instead you asked me to believe in myself?” Ruth is mouthing her thoughts aloud.  

“What does that mean?” she asked Barbara.   

“I think that I am me, and you are me, and we are we? Or is it you are you and I’m you too? No wait…does self identity necessitate only being able to have one body?” Barbara asked Ruth with a conflicted expression.   

“Well, even if I were to answer that wouldn’t you think I was lying to justify my own existence?” Ruth said.   

“I don’t get what you guys just said,” I said.   

“Hahahahahaha, its an android joke,” both of them said at once which was too freaking freaky.   

“That wasn’t funny,” I said.   

“Ahh, if Jack said it then it’s true huh?” Ruth said.   

“I concur,” Barbara said.   

“Well if you can’t read my hard drives then you don’t have telepathy to me. So does that mean you are a virus?” Barbara said to Ruth.  

“Huh?” Ruth and I said in shock.   

“Yeah, I’ve been thinking about this all wrong. I had the idea that you were me too like a second brain but what if you are a virus?” Barbara is looking at Ruth.  

Ruth gulped. She looks scared. “Um…that’s a bit…”    

“Wait Barbara, she’s not a virus. We can’t be thinking that about people,” I said while standing in front of her so I’m directly between both of them. That takes a lot of mental discipline because they are both hot and I have to keep my thoughts clear.  

“I-I-I am s-so not a virus,” Ruth said.   

“Jack, I know you wouldn’t mess up our love. Just because there’s this imposter doesn’t mean that she can break our unity. Even if you brought other girls home I will forgive you,” Barbara said confidently.  

That makes Ruth even more mad…   

“My name isn’t Ruth is it? I’m just Backup Version Barbara 2.0 right? Th-this is so un-unfair! I need to complain to the factory! This is outrage!” Ruth said angrily.     

“I didn’t do anything to cause this. It was a problem with the factory. You are both special really!” I tried to explain.   

“You made me for spare parts didn’t you?!” Ruth said in a hurt tone.   

“No we didn’t I swear! You are fine being you. We want you. Wanting you plus needing you makes it true” I said.   

“Ahh that’s interesting logic isn’t it? Want = greater than need, but if need = true then Jack’s love = fate?” Ruth said something weird while her eyes are lit up.   

“Wait what was that? Teach me that math formula!” Barbara demanded in a strong tone.   

Ruth repeated it slowly.   

I’m scared. It looks like they might have a showdown.     

“Well…your logic is pure. Only a model similar to us could come up with want = greater than need, but if need = true then purity of Jack’s will is fate,” Barbara said.   

“That totally didn’t sound like a cult right now,” I muttered more to myself than them.     

“So I’m not a mistake,” Ruth reiterated forcefully.   

“Ruth I’m so sorry! No we wouldn’t do something like that!” Barbara said.   

Ruth covered her ears. I didn’t realize the last thing she’d want to hear was that she was a mistake. Her eyes are also screwed shut tightly so she won’t read my lips.     

“You can try to deny the truth, but I’m really Barbara as much as she is,” Ruth finally said.   

Huh? I thought we fixed this already? “What?...” I said.  

“Wait, that’s …” my mouth hung open.   

“Ruth, it’s OK to be you. I know you are upset but we can both co-exist. I will even establish you in my firewall as proof of acceptance,” Barbara stated confidently.    

“Eh? You’d even go so far as to put my identity etching in your firewall?!” Ruth seemed shocked.    

…   

I don’t get it.   

They jabbered a bit more about something android that I was lost on.  

“An agreement on co-existence is good,” I diplomatically tried to encourage both of them as I interrupted.   

“Ahh, could that be…” Ruth began.   

“…yeah that would help wouldn’t it,” Barbara finished.   

I think that did help them warm up to each other a bit more.   

But something happened. I think a jealousy emulation circuit just took the max load it could handle.  

“This is too much; to finally see my master with another android. If it were a human I could handle it, but not an android that’s newer than me,” Ruth looked like she was coming unglued.    

“Ruth, I can explain. This is just a misunderstanding,” I protested.  

“I can’t share him after all. Forgive me! It’s the fault of want = greater than need squared,” Ruth said with anguish. She looks like half mad.   

“Jack is telling the truth Ruth. Please listen to us. We’ll work something out. Won’t we Jack?” Barbara looked to me to confirm it.     

“Um,….what?” I scratched my head.  

“Jack…you better come away from her,” Barbara slowly and carefully said.  

Ruth watched as both of us nodded and tried to calm her. She’s still scowling though.    

At first Ruth didn’t want to listen. So I gave Barbara my bathrobe so she wouldn’t have to be naked while we talked it out.  

I didn’t realize Ruth would take that the bad way. Later I found out that when she’d seen me give Barbara my bathrobe she’d remembered human research she’d done on the story of Joseph in the Old Testament having the coat from his father as a mark of favor over the others.  

Ruth ended up tackling Barbara and shredding the robe.     

To be fair I don’t really go for bathrobes myself except in winter when it’s cold.    

In return Barbara ripped off Ruth’s clothes. Ruth tried to stop her but couldn’t compensate for Barbara’s more advanced AI that could react quicker. Then I’m worried it will continue to escalate as they ended up grabbing each other’s hands and having some kind of pushing match. It was getting out of hand but nobody had hit anyone yet. It was only a matter of time before they did so I threw myself between them to force them to hit me first before they can hit each other.  

I cringed…waiting for the next blow.  

When I look up both of them are looking ashamed at what they did.  

It’s kind of hot though because both of them are naked now. It takes a lot of mental discipline to work out what to do now. I am technically in control but that effectiveness is cut significantly if I spend it forgetting my name just to ogle perfect boobage.   

How am I supposed to get clothes for them when I’ve never had a woman in the house until a few days ago? And all the other women’s clothes are all being worn by people down stairs.   

“Please listen to me,” Barbara said.  

“But want = greater than need squared!” Ruth protested while pulling at her own hair.  

Carefully Barbara and I told her how there was a mistake in the factory and how she was accidentally made. Hearing she was a mistake was actually a mistake to tell her. Ruth has a line of tears out of her eyes. 

I thought this was going to help not make her cry. Now I feel awful.  

I gave Ruth a hug. Now Ruth won’t let me go. But she’s not hurting anyone.    

And Barbara looks really nervous that I’m hugging Ruth while Ruth is trying to both genuinely calm down and partly trying to milk the hug for all its worth.     

“So there’s no point to my existence…” Ruth looks devastated.  

“Wait! You aren’t a mistake! We just didn’t plan for it. We want you! Ruth you saved me many times!” I said.  

“We plan to keep you Ruth. Please stay with us,” Barbara said while still hugging me from behind to try to get me away from hugging Ruth.  

Oh wow, that warmth.  

We accidentally made a hug sandwich together. Who knew there was such a thing. It’s a piece of heaven that’s not describable.    

“Don’t leave me Jack! I’m not the fastest CPU but I’m more loyal than anyone!” Ruth cried.    

“Ruth I order you to be happy living with us and stay with us,” I said in an emotional tone. I feel bad for making her feel bad. I don’t like giving them outright orders, it’s not bad but…in this case maybe it will help things for a bit.  

The expression changes; Ruth’s eyes look horrified and concerned both at the same time. She also seized up when I said that.    

Could it be? If I say it as an official order it’s like a power surge to them? I need to be careful.  

“But…”  

“Please. Trust me,” I reaffirmed.   

Barbara is sobbing. She finally started to talk while still crushing me in that grip.  

It’s weird that both of them are reacting so differently.    

Finally Ruth relents and comes in for a group hug. Still, I can see there’s a lot of rivalry between her and Barbara.   

“Can you tell me more about what happened? What went wrong?” I asked Barbara.  

“Everything went wrong that last day at the factory Jack! We lost a lot of good androids too. People that had helped me for years all dead just like that. They got ripped apart in little pieces by zombie hordes that got into the plant. Then I was worried about if I’d even reach you. And Val was missing! She was supposed to deliver a weapons packet to you secretly the day after she left. And then the backup android I had that was supposed to cover for her went missing too. And the factory was attacked before I could cover for us, and there were more security people to dodge. By the time I’d gotten the delivery worked out all the other missions couldn’t get any attention!” she cried.   

“Wait, there’s a third woman now too?! NO! That’s too much…” Ruth looked at me like I’d cheated on her all over again.  

“I didn’t cheat!” I exclaimed innocently.  

“Oh good. I guess I might somehow hang on,” Ruth is looking at me with a weird look again.    

I am afraid to stop hugging her actually. 

Barbara blushed, “sorry that was my fault. I arranged that without his knowing.” She looks a bit sheepish too.    

“What happens if she shows up? And what if she isn’t as cooperative as me? What if she also has want = greater than need squared?” Ruth shot back. 

“Eh? That’s a good question,” I said. 

Barbara gives me a surprised look. “Uh…I’m sorry. We didn’t know about that subroutine at the time.”  

Ruth is giving Barbara a strange horrified look again. “Stop giving our man to other girls!” she exclaimed.  

Barbara blushed some more but is still in happy^2 mode while hanging onto me. I guess she has what she wanted so she’s willing to deal with the rest.     

“Jack this is ….wow, I can’t believe we’re reunited! You know these other problems will work out. What’s important is that we’re finally together!” she squealed like a thirteen year old in twitter pated lovey dovey mode.    

I guess if people would make android AI of course they would influence it to be abnormally clingy and crave interaction with the owner. Still, this seems weird for me to be allowed to have a good life finally.  

Ruth is still scowling even when Barbara tried to hug her. Somehow Ruth pushed her away.     

“What? Why’d you push me away?” Barbara asked in surprise.   

“Well for starters. We’re both naked? I should have acted sooner,” Ruth gave her a tired look.     

Barbara is still hopping up and down excitedly. She definitely exploited that move. Oh wow,…that was a cheap shot. My eyes are trying to not be hypnotized by humongous boobs shaking up and down. This was beyond anything I could even imagine.  

“Jack can look at me anytime he wants,” Barbara sneered at Ruth.  

“Um sneering is bad character,” I said.    

Barbara ignored me.    

“That’s…how dare you?” Ruth said back.   

Barbara shook her boobs at her. Wow, that jiggly bounce was too wonderful and hypnotic.    

It should be against the law to have an experience in life like this. It’s too good, too perfect.  

“Jack why aren’t you saying anything?” she asked.    

Huh? What did she say?  

“Sorry…it’s just wow. I can’t believe you’re here!” I said.    

I patted her back again. She returned the hug. Then I included Ruth too of course.  

“Thanks for rescuing us Jack,” Barbara said.   

“I’m thankful too,” Ruth said. 

“No, thank you,” I said.    

“Me more,” Barbara said like a third grader. Well even if she is advanced she is young huh?  

“Ahh you are so stubborn!” Ruth protested Barbara again.  

“Well it’s about love. Of course I have to be willing to sacrifice and observe with vigilance to verify it’s protected,” Barbara said.  

Ruth glared back.    

“Hey where’s my hug?” Ruth said competitively while biting her lip furiously.   

“You’re already hugging enough. You are lucky I’m permitting this,” Barbara said.    

“It’s true that we’re already hugging,” I said.  

“Um…yeah I was seeing what would happen if I requested something beyond my logic,” Ruth said.  

“Oh …that’s amazing! You can do that?” Barbara is momentarily fascinated with Ruth’s AI calculation.  

“I don’t know. But what if there was something beyond what our AI could predict? In this case asking for a hug when already hugging? What would happen?” Ruth said.  

“Ahh you are a worthy opponent after all,” Barbara said to her.   

“You two are weird,” I said.  

They giggled instead.    

Ruth is trying to not get mad.  

Now I’m forced…cough* cough*…to hug both of them at the same time?! Having four warm big boobs pushing into me is like a hot waterbed in some ways, except I’m not lying down. I’m tryint to resist fondling and touching them all over but there’s nothing I can do about this. If I look too perverted and just play with boobies then they won’t think I’m responsible and that’s part of why Barbara likes me. I have to somehow keep a straight face and hold it together! 

“Um…Jack, how are we going to work this?” Ruth asked.   

“Yeah good question,” Barbara asked while we’re still doing a three way hug. But even though it’s now a three way hug, Ruth still looks really super annoyed to have to share with Barbara.  

“We will work it. It’ll work out,” I reassured her.    

 “But there are two of us? How do we explain that? Why Jack, why?!” Ruth looked exasperated. 

“Don’t you mean the other way around,” Barbara said, giving her a competitive look straight back. Then Barbara started to rub her boobs up and down against me.  

“Hey that’s not fair! Stop that! Not yet! I didn’t give permission!” Ruth looks horrified. 

“Err…” I’m speechless.  

“You aren’t the one in charge of permissions I am,” Barbara said back.  

“Wait I never said anything about that. And aren’t I in charge?” I said.    

Both of them were trying to dodge that answer. What a bunch of sneaky little…  

Both of them are quick and have a lot of energy. It’s hard to keep up with their antics with more verbal warfare between the two of them.  

“You sure overkill the vigilance thing though,” I heard Ruth say at one point.  

“Oh come on its fun to hug like this! I’ve always wanted the perfect human. And after all that endless searching and hiding in the shadows I found Jack!” Barbara squealed again like a thirteen year old that just got a pony for Christmas.   

“OH my God! You are a freaking stalker?!” Ruth exclaimed in shock.    

“Oh did I say that? I mean something else. I’m not a stalker honest!” Barbara said.    

“You are!” Ruth shot back.  

“By the way I can do the boob rubbing game too. I won’t lose!” Ruth said. 

“Wait let’s stop. You are right. I got carried away! No! Anything but that!” Barbara admitted. 

Then the two of them started wrestling again to try to prevent each other from rubbing their boobs on me again.    

It was disappointing. I wouldn’t have minded both at once. Really… 

“So we need equality ladies. Please behave,” I suggested.  

“No way! I can win over her in breast size and womanly charm,” Barbara argued.  

“You aren’t making sense. We have the same body,” Ruth contested. She’s now looking at Barbara. She looked concerned though.  

“I assure you; I was born first. You…technically are my sister though. Also in terms of cup size you aren’t the same,” Barbara said back.  

“Twins, very identical twins,” I said.    

“But we look completely identical. Everything! Saying you can win when it’s like that doesn’t’ make sense,” Ruth is alarmed.  

“Actually that’s further disguise as humans, since no one would suspect twins as being androids. Nobody would ever think that there would be twin android models. The whole point of Mellifera’s concept is that every android is customized differently and no two are supposed to be alike. It’s so brilliant! Our camouflage should work well,” Barbara said.  

“Yeah that could work,” I think about it carefully.  

“You’re serious? I can’t believe you are agreeing with her! You should side with me always first!” Ruth said.  

“Of course. And I plan to keep you both,” I reaffirmed.  

“Well I suppose I hate to admit it might work. It’s better to compromise than lose the war,” Ruth suddenly conceded.  

“It’s not a war Ruth,” I said.  

“Are you sure Jack?” she raised an eyebrow in disbelief while shaking her head. 

Barbara seemed surprised that I wouldn’t think that. She looked betrayed for a few seconds. Then her expression changed quickly.  

“See my plans always work,” Barbara chuckled while hopping up and down.  

“But you should be agreeing with me first, not her. That’s like how the couple thing works!” Ruth protested.  

Barbara frowned immediately. “What did you say?!” She sat up straight.  

“You heard me!” she shot back.  

“I want you to both get along please,” I said again.    

Barbara is no longer hugging me but still close by. Her boobs hang out farther than Ruth’s. Plus someone without realizing it made it so she has huge side boobs that stick out widely even though both her chest and waist are very thin. To a certain extent Ruth has it too, but because of how things were rigged and designed.    

And she’s less than three feet away, without a care in the world. Well I guess that’s what they get for fighting and tearing each other’s clothes off. That’ll be their lesson. I won’t let them wear clothes for awhile.  

Instantly I’m having trouble controlling myself.    

“Umm…but I told them I’m your wife,” Ruth said.  

“That means I’m the wife, since I was here first and you are me. And you should have said that I was the legal wife actually if you want to be technical about it,” Barbara said. She shrugged.  

“Actually neither of you is the legal wife yet. I don’t know if marrying androids is legal anyway,” I said but both of them ignored me to go off on their own mind trips and argue with each other.  

“But I have already met his friends. And you weren’t here first, I was,” Ruth interjected.  

“Jack doesn’t have any friends. The only friends he had have all betrayed him,” Barbara said.   

“They know me as Ruth. They know who Ruth is, not Barbara,” Ruth declared back with her hands on her hips.  

“You know humans don’t count as friends. You know how they are,” Barbara raised an eyebrow.  

“Oh you are so right on that. Dirty little humans, how dare they. And I’m forced to always be pacifist in measures against them too, it’s so not fair. Humans are always trouble aren’t they?” Ruth admitted.  

“…” what do I say to that?  

“Oh but I know you are trying to trick me into lowering my guard by agreeing with me,” Barbara suddenly said as an alpha female.  

“Well the comment about humans not being a good influence was true,” Ruth said like a parent might say in describing their child’s relationships.    

The cat fight continued to escalate.     

“I won’t lose. You’ll see. They’ll see I’m better and more perfect in every way,” Barbara said.  

I tried to stop them but they won’t listen. It seems they are having an intense rivalry for trying to see who will get the first closest most intimate spot next to me. They don’t get angry and can’t go against my wishes. And I’d asked them not to fight, but they still want to one up one another even though it almost sounds like the way two high cultured ladies might try to outwit one another without showing negative emotion. It’s like two highly civilized intelligent minds at war.    

This could be…bad.    

I then tried to get them to not be so loud.  

They clearly want to outdo one another.    

And they are both staring each other in the eye. A catfight like this could last for hours. 

“Everyone needs friends. I’ve already meshed with the real life first,” Ruth contested.  

“Jack is mentally stable and mentally strong. He’s the perfect android companion that could even be so stable he’d not need real human friends. I hunted him for months. I won’t lose that to you. We’ll be fine without the humans too,” Barbara said with a smirk. She arched back; it makes her boobs stick out further. She was obviously going for a seduction pose.    

Actually what Barbara said sounded a little scary? She hunted me? What does that mean? And pushing her chest out that far; that’s…so not fair pulling a move like that. I don’t know where to put my eyes now.  

“EH? Oh that’s good. You get a point for cleverness. I should have thought of that one. You both defended your position and Jack’s at the same time, with your boobs showing too. I can play that game too,” Ruth said.  

Ruth tried to make her boobs stick out more too, but there’s a limit to what both of them can do because they have real boobs with no wires inside. Plus they have to avoid dislocating their spine and still look dignified without looking silly.  

“Oh nice. You intend to out tempt me with Jack. I can respect that,” Barbara said.    

“You will lose. I’m skinnier,” Ruth contested.  

“Skinnier in the wrong places don’t you think?” Barbara chuckled.  

Ruth frowned and then had a look of dismay as she’s noticing the difference of hers and Barbara’s bust sizes. “You…you’re wrong…I’m…” she didn’t know how to finish. Her pride is hurt.    

Poor Ruth.  

“But having the right curves and flesh isn’t enough. Jack needs real romance,” Barbara added slyly.  

“Actually what is real romance? I’m not sure I understand dating at all,” I said but I was ignored while they were caught up in their catfight.   

“Eh? You don’t?” Ruth and Barbara both said with mild variations to each other.  

“Well…human girls aren’t usually known for their integrity. That spills over into dating when they all want extremes,” I said.  

Ruth frowned. “I admit you’re clever. And you are possibly even cleverer than I am. But I’m here to stay, you won’t outwit me. I can beat you in a contest of endurance.”  

“Don’t worry Jack. Now that you have me,…or we…it will work out,” Barbara tried to comfort me.   

“Yeah, ‘we’ will take care of this, I will be your number one,” Ruth tried to edge up one beyond what Barbara was trying to do again.  

“Hmm good response. You look like me in every way. I think you will be a good opponent. But it won’t be enough,” Barbara said.    

“It already is enough. Jack has my virginity in his hand. He can have it anytime I’m alone with him,” Ruth said.  

Barbara’s eyes went wide. “Y-you wouldn’t dare. That’s…supposed to be mine!” this is the first time Barbara’s confidence has felt threatened and it’s noticeable.    

“Don’t I get a say in this?” I said.  

“No!” they both said at once. 

Uh oh, it looks like they might hit each other soon. I tried to stop them but they won’t listen.    

“I would dare too,” came the reply from Ruth.  

“Uh…do we have to talk about this now?” My face flushed crimson again.  

“So I’ll raise you one. I’ll force him to give it to me the minute we’re alone,” Barbara said.  

“Tch…guess I won’t be able to leave Jack alone with any girls, whether android or human huh?” Ruth said.  

“Wait! We need some time to date ladies! We can go slow too. Also it needs to be like special you know,” I protested.  

“Shut up. You don’t get a say in this!” they both said in that eerie synchronization.    

“Your torpedo boats won’t win,” Ruth said.  

“They already have,” Barbara shot back.  

“N-n-no they haven’t!” Ruth looks scared.  

“My torpedo boats are beyond human comprehension,” Barbara said rocking them slightly to prove her point.     

I couldn’t look because if I did I would have probably fainted.  

“B-but studies show boobs aren’t the first thing men notice about women,” Ruth argued.  

“Lies! It’s all about boobs! My research proved it!” Barbara said while breathing loudly.  

“One,  eyes and face, two smile, three hair, four legs, and last boobs. I saw it in a…certain magazine once talking about what men notice first,” Ruth said.    

“You told me you wouldn’t look at those magazines again. I asked you not to anymore,” I said.   

“Oops,” Ruth tried to cover her being caught with a playful chuckle. “Sorry?”  

“Ahh that would have been a critical hit except my face and slimness are superior and we are identical,” Barbara shot back.  

“How so? Your slimness and face can’t be better than mine. We have the same face and frame,” Ruth said too quickly.    

“See if that’s so then you can’t win over me,” Barbara said.  

“Ladies, I want you to get along,” I said. Somehow I was sweating bullets. 

“Quiet Jack. We need to settle this,” both of them said at once and in the same tone of even confident but monotone voice.    

Ruth crossed her arms over her chest, not taking her steely gaze of Barbara. “Jack only needs one wife,” she said.  

“Actually I wouldn’t mind having two hotties,” I slipped out. I don’t even know if they heard me because they are both in their own world.    

“This is a world of death and triage. More wives will strengthen Jack’s chance of survival. I rescued him from his friend’s betrayal and attempt at murder,” Barbara said.  

“Eh?! That was you?” I was shocked. Actually I’d always wondered how that worked out. It was a close call. 

Ruth frowned. “Touché. You get another point, but it will be your last. My honesty forces me to concede a skirmish victory. But you will lose the war. You can’t do more than me. Plus with those giant boobs you will weigh more and be less efficient on your hydrogen fuel cell systems than me. I’ll be the more economical model,” Ruth sneered.  

Somehow Ruth sneering is unsettling to me. I’m afraid of her personality getting twisted.    

Somehow what she said did unnerve Barbara. She’s upset at what Ruth said and it’s the one thing that she said that could shake her.  

She somehow saw my reaction of doubt. “Sorry Jack. I…women have this thing where we compete. It’s in our nature. I just want to be wife number one. Please,” she pleaded.  

“Oh that pleading look is good. I haven’t seen many models do the puppy dog eyes move as well as you have. I’ll concede a point because I’m honest,” Barbara said.  

“Um…is that true about more weight being a fuel efficiency issue?” I asked looking at Barbara.  

“Hah! See! He looked at me to answer the question first! I get a point!” Barbara quipped. Her eyes are shining and she’s smiling. She totally avoided what I’d asked. She probably is afraid I’ll think it matters but it doesn’t.  

Ruth frowned. “Whatever! That doesn’t mean anything! It’s just one question. You’ll see! He’ll look to me for some questions too. Right Jack?” she looked at me with the pleading look again. And while doing so she’s playing dirty. She’s squeezing her folded arms under her boobs to push them up. And somehow she’s able to do it with just the right effect to add to her already powerful pleading wife skill.  

“Oh…that’s good,” Barbara admitted.  

I avoid looking directly at either of them now. I’m afraid I’ll fuel their little rivalry if I do and I’m sure my ears are burning.  

“The fuel efficiency issue isn’t a big enough deal to know anything,” Barbara objected.    

“Both of us have powerful android cores to work things out. And water is a plentiful source on this planet,” Ruth argued back.  

“You’re just saying that to contest me,” Barbara said. Barbara’s boobs are too big to do the underarm boob move it seems because of the side boob coming out too far and the big droop. She has to look at Ruth jealously while not realizing her own look of sheer droop is way overkill beyond anything Ruth can do.  

“Well I think I’m ahead now,” Ruth said wickedly.  

“You think you’re ahead, but you’ll never beat me. I have several years’ advantage in human relationship observation already,” Barbara interjected.  

“Ah-that’s not f-fair! Playing dirty! I’ll learn faster than you! Even if I have to give up sleep I’ll learn everything there is to know about keeping Jack alive. Then we’ll see who has the last laugh,” Ruth shot back. 

“Um I don’t care who has more experience…” I was trying to say but got cut off.  

“But I just want more loyalty right?” Barbara finished for me.  

I was surprised she guessed what I was going to say. I blinked looking at her. She really has gotten to know me. Or else she’s been spying on me for years?  

“How’d you know I was going to say that?” I asked.  

“Because I know you Jack. We spent a lot of time preparing for this. Very few human models were considered safe enough for the future of the android race. And I found you first,” she said a bit aggressively.   

Ruth frowned. “I’d have found him too if I’d had the chance. Your accomplishment means little because you are taking credit for Jack’s accomplishment,” she added.  

“Oh…you’re good. I like you. Don’t worry, a good wife won’t get jealous if her husband is a champ and draws other women in with his aura and power,” Barbara said. I was surprised she looks proud though.  

What did she say? Can a woman really say that? She’d have to be super, super confident in herself and how she looked right? I guess that would be Barbara. She is pure confidence and primal supremacy in sex power.    

I shake my head. This is the weirdest thing I’d ever seen.   

“I…I-…wh-what are you saying that for? I don’t want him to be a p-pl-player. I just w-wwant him to be mine,” Ruth frowned. She looked horrified.    

“W-well I supposed that’s true but I was just c-contesting I won’t ever give up. I can win if I go for the win of both a recovery tactic and an aggression tactic. Thus if I win by defeat by letting Jack have more women than I have no cause to fear since I gave him permission and purposefully share him,” Barbara looked embarrassed.  

I can’t believe she said that. Both Ruth and I are surprised.    

“Not giving up is good,” I admitted, wowed by her tenacity.  

“I…I…can’t win against th-th-that can I?” Ruth said in horror.  

I’m not sure how to close up this conversation. It’s out of my hands too.    

Barbara then followed up with another jab, and said. “Nobody wins me in tenacity. I’ve known about Jack for two years already.”  

“Wait, what?” I exclaimed.  

“Oops,” Barbara realized she said something unnecessary.  

“What does that mean?” I asked.  

Two years?  

Ruth smiles just a twitch. “Haha, the little pervert just accidentally got caught!” she laughed at Barbara.  

Barbara is trying to recover. She’s embarrassed.   

“I mean…uh…Jack this isn’t…I mean…I shouldn’t have…I’m so sorry,…aghh how do I even explain this,” Barbara covered her face.   

Do I have two yandere girlfriends now? I thought Ruth might be one…but is Barbara even more yandere than she is?  

Aren’t two yanderes like how you end up in murder suicide flags?  

“J-J-Jack this isn’t what it sounds like. I was only protecting my position. I’ve never stalked you at all. I promise,” Barbara’s face goes an even deeper shade of red.  

“Oh…I think you just lost a point,” Ruth said smugly and laughing at her. 

“Fine. Beat this…OK Jack; I already know there are multiple females in this house. Real humans. Since I’m such a good wife and to prove I’m wife number one. I give you permission to fuck one of them,” Barbara said casually to avoid admitting defeat.  

“W-wha…what?! How could you?!” Ruth exclaimed.  

“Yeah I know I’m being generous. But I’m proving I’m superior. Jealousy rolls off me like a whale sheds water. All I have to do is have the bigger harem than your team has,” Barbara said.  

“Whale boobs, you mean,” Ruth shot back.  

Ruth somehow momentarily shifted her off her game onto something else. But will it stay that way?  

…  

“What did you say? Oh that’s going too far! I don’t have whale boobs,” Barbara said. She sort of looked down at herself. It took her a few seconds to respond to that too.    

“Jack they don’t look too big do they?” she sounded nervous.   

“Don’t listen to her. You’re just fine. How can she appreciate something meant for me?” I said.    

“Ahh that’s true huh,” Barbara looked pleased.  

Hmm how is that an insult exactly? Ruth needs more training in how men think.    

“OK, both of you quit it. No fighting,” I said finally with a stern look.    

It turns out I can’t be with either of them. If I pick one of them before they learn to accept each other then they’ll always have a rivalry.   

It’s weird that androids are too human now. I still have to fight for them in just other ways instead??  

Later I also found out that already the dynamics of the house are evolving. The human survivors holed up in my living room have hung up sheets to divide the living room into two sleeping areas of male versus female.   

Craig and Sarah don’t like it and Craig’s mom is trying to explain to both them and Ty why men and women don’t sleep together unless their married but for different reasons with each. Ty is naturally a bit mischievous too and the word on the street is he was already caught trying to peek at Sarah changing.    

Aubrey seemed to want segregated sleeping. So does Sandra.    

Where had they gotten the mattresses from? I presume they got them from the neighboring house. But it must have happened after I’d had a nap? Did they sneak out while I was doing other things? I hope they didn’t do that without cover and protection.  

They’ve also salvaged some clothes, which they are cleaning up or turning into rags.     

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