Half A Heart

How can someone be so heartless to humans they're supposed to love unconditionally, no matter what?

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Ainsley's P.O.V 

 

It's the first day back at school from spring break, meaning there was only two months left of school, knowing that information; I still dreaded getting out of my bed. It's my last year, I should be happy and proud that school will be over in less than two months, but a part of me didn't want to go today, a part of me wanted to stay home, I wanted to stay home with the twins, my two beautiful baby boys. Edwin and Parker.

 

They're 10 months old now, but it still feels as if they're still newborn, and that I should be staying at home to take care of them. But they're old enough, so they're in day care now. It's difficult leaving my boys with strangers. But I need school, and since they're father isn't in their lives, that's what has to be done. 

 

I got up out of my bed, thankfully Edwin nor Parker have woken up yet, so I have some time to get myself ready for school. I put my hair in a messy bun and left it that way, I slipped on a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt. I don't care much about the way I look anymore. The only thing that matters these days are the well-being of my boys.

 

After I got my socks on, I heard one of the boys was starting to cry. It was 7:12, school for me started at 8:30, and I drop the boys off around 8:15. When I got into the nursery, I seen Edwin standing up, holding on to his crib bawling. He looks so much like his father, they both do. 

 

Once I got out Edwin is when Parker awoke and started crying. I had really no choice but to pick up Parker as well and carry them both to the living room where I found my mother, thankfully she has let me still live here to help me with the boys. She smiled once she seen me and kindly took Edwin out of my arms. 

 

"Thank you, mum." I say. 

"You're welcome, Ainsley, and good morning." She smiles. "Are you ready for school?" 

"Not quite, I want to stay home." 

"I know, Ains, but you can't. They'll be fine at day care." 

 

I smiled then laid Parker down on the couch beside Edwin, I grabbed two diapers out of the hall closet along with a pack of wipes and my mother and I both changed their diapers. My mother kindly went and got them both an outfit that they could wear for the day. 

 

After they were changed, my mother gave them each a bottle of milk before we left. I looked at them happily, they still like so much like they're father. I wish they didn't at times, but I love them endlessly. My mother patted my shoulder as she walked by me to put on her shoes. 

 

"You ready to go, sweetheart?" She asks. 

"As ready as I'll ever be." I say. 

 

Edwin and Parker's father is not apart of there lives, as much as I wished he was. He had a career to succeed in, and I was moving away. So this is what we had decided, I'll leave and do whatever I'd like with the twins, and he can do whatever he wants. I was hoping that we wouldn't agree to the deal, but he did. 

 

After my mother and I dropped off the boys at daycare, she drove me to school. For some reason, I had a feeling that I shouldn't go today, but I knew no matter what I had to go, if I want to graduate this year, I have to go to school. For the sake of my boys; I'll give them a good life.

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