Falling Hard

"You can't lose what you never had, you can't keep what isn't yours, and you can't hold on to someone who doesn't want to stay."

Seventeen year old Alexa Parker has never believed in love. She's never believed in happy ever afters or the "dumb" fairy tales where the princess always ends up with a charming prince. But when she moves to a new city and town and has to switch schools she's forced to cross a path that might change her life forever.



I sighed as I looked at the view of the town before me, tilting my head back slightly as I felt the zephyr of a breeze flow through my long brown hair.

Coming to this place- the hill I currently sat atop- gave me a sense of peace and serenity and that was something I hardly got enough of with everything that has been going wrong in my life.

A few years ago I had the best life ever. I lived in a fairly large house, had loving parents, got along with my over-protective brother, and in my eyes we were as perfect as a family could get. But when the arguing started and my dad cheated on my mom my oh-so-perfect family wasn't that perfect anymore. And since then I couldn't help but feel as if my happiness was slowly ebbing away, day by day. Things got worse when my parents finally divorced and I was separated from my only sibling as my father got custody of him and my mother got me.

The shrill sound of my phone ringing- for what had to be the hundredth time- broke me from my thoughts. I sighed before answering the call and lifting the device to my ear.

"Hello?" I answered, a hint of aggravation evident in my voice.

"Where the hell are you, Alexa!" My mother screamed angrily.

"You were supposed to be home hours ago packing the rest of your things and now the moving trucks will be here any minute mean while your stuff still isn't packed. I've been calling you for God knows how long." Her voice trails off at the end and I slightly start to feel bad.

"I'll be there in a few minutes. Just needed time to myself before we go." I reply.

"I think four hours is more than enough time. Just get home, okay? I'll try to put some of your things away until you get here." She says before the line goes dead.

I grab my car keys from out of my pocket before loosing a breath and slowly making my way to my car.

Today will be my last day in this town and once we leave I'm pretty sure we won't be coming back anytime soon. But despite everything that's happened I sadly don't wan't to leave. I know I should want to go somewhere far from here and get a new start but I know a piece of me will always remain here.

It doesn't make it any easier knowing that I'll also be leaving my only brother here with the man who ruined our family.

The car ride home was short and silent. I didn't even bother to blast the radio like I always did. When I pulled into the drive way of my house I saw two large moving trucks parked on our lawn. Just as I was about to walk through the door, my step father, James, walks out at the same time, holding what looked to be a very heavy box.

He shot me a small smile but I didn't acknowledge him as I ran up stairs to my room, knowing that's where my mother would be.

"Took you long enough." She sighed as I walked through my room door and flopped onto my bed. I was surprised at how many boxes my mom managed to pack within the time frame of twenty minutes. My room looked near empty but then again I did pack a lot the day before. The only things left were miscellaneous items.

"Your welcome by the way." She said as she taped the last box shut and made her way out of my room.

"Love you, mom!" I screamed after her knowing that she was smiling right now. My mother was the type of person who couldn't stay mad at someone no matter what they did. You could probably set our house on fire and she would forgive you. That's just how she was and that's one thing I loved about her. But that didn't mean I took advantage.

When I hear the sound of her footsteps thumping against the wood of our stairs I get up and shut the door before picking up an empty box and groaning. I would really miss living here no matter how many times I called this town a piece of crap.

I began to empty what was in the remainder of my drawers for awhile when I came across a picture. My somewhat good mood dropped and I grimaced at the sight of my ex-boyfriend and I. We were at the carnival and he had his arms wrapped around me as I looked at the camera smiling, oblivious to the fact that he was staring down at me the whole time, eyes sparkling.

He used to make me so happy even after everything happened. I even thought he loved me at a point but after I found out he was with another girl the whole time I realized that I live in a world where true love doesn't exist. I don't even know why I still have the picture.

The hard knock on my door makes me jump and I quickly crumble up the picture before throwing it into the trash bag I left in here the day before when I was cleaning up my room.

"What do you want?" I yelled, thinking it was probably James or my mom coming to tell me to pick up the pace.

"Now, is that any way to talk to your favorite brother?" A voice I knew all to well replied as the door opened. I lunged up from my spot on the floor and tackled him into a hug.

"I missed you." I whispered, inhaling the scent of the cologne he's been using ever since he was old enough to use it.

"Missed you more kiddo." He said, squeezing me tight.

My brother, Dean, and I were super close. I guess you can say we were like two peas in a pod. Our closeness had other kids wondering how we can just get along so naturally without tearing each other's hair out like most siblings do. But Dean had been there for me basically my whole life and I can't remember a time when we ever fought and if we did it was always playful arguing.

"I didn't know you were coming." I said while pulling back. I honestly didn't think that he would come to see me today, especially with everything he has to do at the university. But if there's one thing you should know about Dean, it's that he's full of surprises.

"I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't visit my only sister before she moved far, far away." He stated dramatically.

"I'm probably going to hate it there. I wish James never got that job promotion." He must have noticed my mood change because he instantly wrapped his arms around me again.

"Trust me when I say that I hate this more than you do but it's for the best. When have you ever seen mom this happy?" I didn't want to say it but I knew he was right. Ever since my mom met James she's been the happiest she's been in years. Don't get me wrong, he was a great guy and he cared for my mom and I greatly but sometimes I would find myself wondering how did everything go so wrong? Were my parents not as happy as I thought they were? Was my mom not up to my fathers standards anymore?

I know those are horrible things to think about but I couldn't help but wonder. 
Suddenly I felt myself being lifted off the ground and gently thrown onto my mattress.

"S-stop!" I was left in a giggling frenzy as Dean tickled me to death. It was something he's always done to cheer me up when he knew I was feeling sad.

"What's the magic word, Lexi?" He mimicked a baby voice and I giggled even more at the old nickname.

"Please. Stop please!" He finally stopped and I took the time to catch my breath as it was labored from all the laughing. We sat in a comfortable silence until I finally spoke.

"Thank you," I said. "I needed that. I haven't laughed that much in a long time." It was true. Ever since the divorce and my break up no one has been able to make me laugh or even smile except on a few rare occasions.

"I'm gonna really miss you.  I'm especially gonna miss the times when I get to annoy the heck out of you." He smirked.

"I'm gonna miss you too," I smiled a true genuine smile. "Now get up and help your sister carry all these boxes downstairs."
He groaned but I knew he didn't mind as we got up off the bed.

It was in this moment where I felt happy and light. Even if I knew it wouldn't last I was happy, and that was all that mattered at the moment.

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