Me and My Mental Health Story

Hi... I'm Chloe, I'm 18 years old and I'm from the UK

I used to love playing football and multiple sports. I say used too... When I was 13 or 14, everything changed for me, but life went on as normal. Well from the outside it would have seemed normal, but for me, it was far from it.

Mental Health is something that is extremely stigmatised in the UK and across the world. This is my ongoing battle with mental health and what my experience of being in the UK mental health system is like. Everyone's experiences are different... but here's my story.

**TRIGGER WARNING**

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6. Me and My IAPT Experience

I can't really remember much from my IAPT appointments. They were with one of their CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) therapists who we shall call Mary. In the first appointment in July, she asked me the same questions as CAMHS did about my mood and family history, as well as making me fill in a questionnaire so she could get a better idea of how everything had been effecting my life. She talked through it, explaining which each part was about and said (once again!) it was quite obvious I was severely depressed and need help quickly. Mary asked if I was with CAMHS or on any medication to which I explained that CAMHS had discharged me and that I was on 20mg of Fluoxetine. She said that it would be better for me to be with CAMHS and therefore referred me back to them.


I had another appointment with Mary a couple of weeks later in August. Once again she asked about how my mood had been and got me to fill in another questionnaire so she was able to compare the two. From what I had put down, she said that I had deteriorated quite a bit and that I wasn't getting the help quick enough. During this appointment, she told me that she was also a CBT therapist at CAMHS, so she would be able to offer me a course of CBT under CAMHS, whilst I was on a waiting list with IAPT. It was just before the appointment ended she asked about any plans to take my life or do some serious damage to myself. I admitted that I had plans to carry out that day. This was the first time that being an IP (Inpatient) was brought up. She called my mum and asked her to come in and explained to her what I had said - that I was planning to overdose on over fifty painkillers. Before I left, she called CAMHS and got me an appointment with her the following week for CBT, and informed my psychiatrist of what I had said to her.

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