The Chase

Bucky Bitters struggles to escape the airborne affections of Derpy Hooves after a chance encounter caused them to bump noses together. His real mistake was trying to comfort the mare after the snoot-bump. Little does the poor stallion realise that their meeting was only the prologue to a journey that will change not only his life, but the lives around him forever.

This story is a sequel to The Catch


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Ignoring Rarity’s shrill squeals of protest, Rainbow Dash dragged Rarity away to a private cabin, pulling her along with one folded fetlock hooked around Rarity’s own fetlock. Rainbow plowed forward on three legs, and while Rarity came along, she did so under dramatic protest and with sufficient token resistance.

“Unhoof me you brute,” Rarity demanded as Rainbow Dash pulled her through the door and Rarity cried out when the door slammed shut.

“I need a friend,” Rainbow Dash said, looking Rarity in the eye.

“Oh… well, why didn’t you say so?” Rarity asked.

“It’s complicated!” Rainbow Dash gushed in reply. “I’m so confused. I made a mistake. I’ve made so many mistakes. I keep making mistakes!” she shouted as she flopped down upon the small bed, landing on her back and covering up her face with her front hooves.

“Tell me what is wrong, dear,” Rarity said, her demeanor changing as she hopped up onto the bed beside Rainbow Dash and settled in.

“Promise me that nothing I say will leave this room!” Rainbow Dash demanded from behind her hooves.

“You are one of my best friends. I promise,” Rarity vowed.

“Ugh I don’t know where to start,” Rainbow Dash grunted.

Reaching out and patting Rainbow, Rarity tried to console her friend. “The beginning is usually a good place,” Rarity whispered.

“The beginning eh?” Rainbow Dash replied. “Well, if that is the case… earlier this year, Twilight and I flew to Canterlot to spy on Berry Punch and we saw Primrose Propers get cunt punted… the kick heard around the world. The start of the war. And later, we were visiting Celestia and I was kinda defending Berry Punch and what she did and I sorta said something about if somepony was to harm one feather on Twilight’s body that I’d kill them… I said it ‘cause I was all emotional and stuff, but I meant it, and then I sort of realised that I really loved Twilight. I mean really loved Twilight. I had been attracted to her before, even when she was still a unicorn, there was something about her eggheadedness that I liked.”

“I see,” Rarity said, making a distasteful moue at the words “cunt punted” and raising one eyebrow in disapproval. “Do go on.”

“But I haven’t said anything to her because I don’t want to ruin this great friendship we have. I don’t think Twilight swings that way. I mean, she’s all straight laced and kind of a prude and you know how she gets if we talk about sexy stuff. You remember the night when Pinkie Pie talked about masturbation and made that joke about the time I saw Discord playing with himself and Twilight got so stressed out that she threw up into the popcorn bowl…”

“Yes, I do remember that in quite some detail Rainbow Dash,” Rarity stated, shuddering and looking rather distressed.

“Well, if I tell Twilight that I want to mash our mare minges together she might hate me… I love her so much and she is my best friend. I can’t stand thinking about all of the ways she might hate me if I spring this on her, so I don’t say anything,” Rainbow Dash whimpered.

Shuddering with revulsion, Rarity closed her eyes. “Rainbow Dash, your language… so I take it you are having a problem because of Flash Sentry moving in on your turf.”

“Yes!” Rainbow Dash replied. “I really messed up there too… I feel so guilty… so guilty. I made a truce with him and promised that I wouldn’t sabotage his efforts to romance Twilight… but I did! I did try to sabotage his efforts! That smarmy pegasus came to me for help on how to talk to Twilight and I had this evil idea and-”

“And you told him to use the most dreadful pick up lines in existence, only it backfired terribly and now Twilight is utterly charmed by Flash Sentry,” Rarity interrupted.

“Yeah,” Rainbow Dash admitted in a raspy whine. “Why am I such an awful pony? Why must I be so possessive and horrible?”

“Dashie, take a deep breath for me,” Rarity requested. She watched her friend draw in a deep breath, hold it, and let it out slowly. She patted Rainbow on her taut tummy and leaned over Rainbow to look her in the eye.

“That’s not even the worst of it!” Rainbow Dash shouted in a nasal whine.

“Oh?” Rarity asked, still trying to get Rainbow Dash to calm down.

“I think I’m falling in love with Flash… I mean, I didn’t mean to do it, it just happened and we’ve been hugging and he squeezed me… and oh horseapples everything has become so complicated,” Rainbow Dash confessed.

“Oh my gracious,” Rarity whispered, her eyes narrowing and her brows furrowing.

“I am such a horrible pony!” Rainbow Dash said as she collapsed into sobs. “I’m not loyal, I’m selfish, I’m mean, I bully other ponies, and I… I…”

“Oh Dashie, I don’t know what to say… we all have our faults,” Rarity said, laying down beside Rainbow Dash on the bed and pulling the pegasus close, embracing her tightly and stroking Rainbow Dash’s neck to make the wailing pegasus settle down.

“I tried to wreck my best friend’s love life just because I want her for myself. I don’t deserve her… she’s so happy with Flash… I’m a bitch!” Rainbow shrieked.

“You hush right this instant!” Rarity demanded, slapping Rainbow Dash lightly on the back of the head, her hoof causing a rather hollow sounding “conk” noise to manifest.

The distraught pegasus said nothing else, but continued to cry as Rarity held her close. Rarity gently ran her hoof up and down Rainbow’s neck, trailing lightly, the unicorn having learned long ago that pegasi needed physical comforting from her many encounters with Fluttershy.

“Rainbow, darling, you need to tell Twilight Sparkle the truth. She deserves that. And Flash too. This could still have a happy ending. You might form a herd or something,” Rarity whispered.

Sniffling, Rainbow Dash took a deep breath and cleared her throat. “Yeah right… like Twilight would do something like that. She throws up in the popcorn bowl when you make jokes about masturbation. What do you think she’ll do if the idea of a threesome gets into her head? We’ll see an alicorn level neurotic breakdown.”

“Well, maybe. Most likely… you do bring up a good point. Twilight Sparkle is… fragile,” Rarity stated, fully aware of her own hypocrisy, feeling burning shame creeping up the back of her neck and cheeks. I’m an awful friend as well she thought to herself.

“So Rarity, are you like a lesbian or a bi-sexual now?” Rainbow asked, changing the subject. She drew in a deep convulsive breath and let it out slowly. Tears still flowed from her eyes, but her painful sobbing had subsided a bit.

“Oh I wouldn’t know how to answer that… it has nothing to do with gender. Coco is beautiful, but it isn’t because she is a mare. She is an amazing pony and she makes me want to be a better pony. I am in love with the part of her that is beyond gender… I don’t know how to explain it. It’s like I don’t care if she is male or female, I just want her body because of the mind that comes with it. Everything she says… everything she does… her kind honesty…” Rarity answered hesitantly, pausing frequently as her jumbled thoughts spilled out in pieces.

“I know how you feel,” Rainbow Dash said with a snuffle.

“You do?” Rarity asked.

“Yeah,” Rainbow Dash replied. “Twilight… I mean, she’s sexy in her own way, don’t get me wrong, but that isn’t why I love her. I love her spirit. I love her courage. I love her will. The parts of her that I love about her the most have nothing to with gender. My dad… he warned me about being careful who I fell in love with, because the physical things only last so long. And once those fade with age, you’re left with nothing when you get old. You wake up one day at the breakfast table and realise you have nothing to talk about. I could see myself growing old with Twilight and talking about things like Daring Do books.”

“I had no idea that you were capable of such depth,” Rarity said in astonishment.

“Oh thanks Rarity,” Rainbow Dash grumbled.

“Well, you never show this side of you… what you said was beautiful,” Rarity replied in pouty tones, pulling Rainbow closer and rubbing her cheek against Rainbow’s neck. “It sums up how I feel about Coco rather nicely.”

“What do I do Rarity?” Rainbow whined.

“You tell Twilight the truth,” Rarity suggested.

“Maybe when this trip is over,” Rainbow Dash stated. “She’s under a lot of pressure and it can wait till we get home.”

“That seems reasonable,” Rarity said.

“What do I do if I lose my friend?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“That won’t happen, I promise,” Rarity soothed. “I will help you. We will all help you. And don’t look at Flash Sentry as competition, otherwise, you will ruin everything.”

“Probably. I hate losing,” Rainbow Dash admitted. “You’re a good friend Rarity.”

“Thank you Dashie dearie,” Rarity replied. “You are a dear friend.”



“Whatcha reading?”

Lowering his book, Bucky looked up at Lyra. “Dark magic battle spells. There is an anti-cohesion spell in here. It causes the cellular structures in the body to break down and become a runny liquid. It causes horrible agony and it causes very little mana consumption,” Bucky replied.

“Neat!” Lyra responded. “While Bonnie isn’t here, tell me all about it!”

Sighing, Bucky grinned. “You know Lyra, as far as wives go, you have a special place in the black part of my heart,” Bucky teased.

“You say the sweetest things, you flatterer,” Lyra tittered.

“The spell is called “Goop” funnily enough. As the first target is turned into a puddle, if the liquid splashes on other living things, it will cause them to break down as well. Sombra invented this spell and it is a hybrid enchantment-transmutation spell. According to Luna’s notes in the book, he turned whole crowds of confined enemies who could not escape into what Luna called “soup” and she wrote it in large bold letters,” Bucky explained.

“That’s awesome!” Lyra exclaimed. “If you use it on the griffons I wanna watch.”

“I’ve already figured out a way to improve upon it,” Bucky said.  

“How could you make it worse?” Lyra whispered in morbid fascination.

“Turn the soupified masses into a golem,” Bucky answered. “Think about how horrible that would be for a moment, my lovely Lyra.”

“It would run around punching things, making them melt, and then sucking them up to keep growing bigger and bigger?” Lyra gasped, her mouth hanging open and her eyes growing wide. “Oh that is gloriously evil,” she breathed. “I wanna have your babies.”

“Nopony understands us quite like we understand one another,” Bucky giggled.

Tittering, Lyra blushed. “It feels nice to flirt with you,” she admitted. “So, what else is in that book?”

“There is a spell called “Tentacle Torment” that looks interesting. Dark magic. Conjuration and transmutation. Opens a semi-permeable portal to Tartarus. A writhing mass of tentacles come out, grab things, begin violating them right away, and then drag them bodily off to Tartarus,” Bucky replied, knowing that Lyra would be interested.

“Oh that sounds neat!” Lyra said with great enthusiasm. “Lemme guess, Sombra?”

“How did you know?” Bucky responded, a lopsided grin manifesting upon his withered face. “Luna has notes for this one too… her sister does not approve of this spell and lectured Sombra about its use on several occasions.”

“Sombra was an immensely powerful archmage. He was Star Swirl’s equal. Star Swirl is remembered, and alas, poor Sombra is best left forgotten,” Lyra stated.

“You know, Clover the Clever learned a lot of dark magic from Sombra. She almost became Tainted I think. It mentions that she developed “mana sickness” and had trouble making harmonious magic for a time. Star Swirl and Sombra had a bit of a falling out because of it. Sombra corrupted his brother’s apprentice, which is dirty pool,” Bucky said, looking thoughtful. “The most interesting thing I learned was about Clover herself.”

“And that was?” Lyra inquired, looking interested.

“Clover the Clever, while very clever, was a dirty cheater. Her name comes from Princess Platinum, and it is an allusion to unicorn cleverness, or being a dirty rotten cheater, because-”

“It isn’t cheating when we do it,” Lyra finished, a fiendish giggle escaping her lips after she spoke.








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