The Dairy of A Vampire

This is the Dairy of a 15-year-old vampire named Vladimira. She lives with her human family and she hates that she can't get the right food. She has never tasted human blood before and her mother and father are pushing her ever closer to trying some of them. But, of course, they don't know that she is a vampire.

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83. Entry 83; Mon May 22, 2017

Wellp, I am sad even though I am trying soo hard not to be. I even tried making a circle and I still feel sad. Nothing seems to be working. Even after the circle, I cried. I know why I am sad I just need to control it. Yup, I am such a control freak. I have to control even little thing about myself and if I don't I am not happy. Why is that I always want to write down what I am feeling? I feel like I have to. Like I don't even have a choice in the matter. But I guess I am fine with that. Summer is started and I already hate it. Can I please just go back to school already? We have been out for about a day. Yup can't take it I want school again. And this one is big, well to me, so it has come to my notice that I am not a normal joe. I don't think like one, I don't act like one, and I most certainly do not talk like one. I act differently than most. I go to sleep at a good time waking up at a good time. (MEANING NOT THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY.) Something else is different though. My, umm, my nightmares have come back... This is why I took the sleeping stuff. Not because it helps me sleep. It doesn't. It keeps away the nightmares. The ones that tell me things and want me to do things. Things that are not good things. Image the very worst times ten. That is what they want me to do. It wasn't for the sleeping help it was for the nightmare block. Yeah, I get them sometimes but they aren't normally so bad with the sleeping stuff. But without it, I am too sleepy in the morning and almost way too freaked out. My mother a few nights ago told me that I should stop taking the sleeping stuff and this is the result of it. I am sad a lot more, I am having nightmares that don't scare me but are telling me to do things that I know better than to go through with. I have to go now I am going to try to calm myself down again.

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