The Dairy of A Vampire

This is the Dairy of a 15-year-old vampire named Vladimira. She lives with her human family and she hates that she can't get the right food. She has never tasted human blood before and her mother and father are pushing her ever closer to trying some of them. But, of course, they don't know that she is a vampire.


79. Entry 79; Tue, May 16, 2017

I know that I have not been on but been busy with school. I have the only school Thursday and Friday this week, and then nothing more. So I have been busy finding myself a summer job. The thing is I find it hard to... It is hard to when people around you are telling you and talking about you behind you that you don't feel anything. The good thing about that though is that I know now that I am improving or very skilled at hiding my feelings. I find that as a bonus. Bad thing though is tat it feels like I am holding hands with the demon of sadness. Sadness just does not leave me alone. And the funny thing I don't know why I am sad. Yes, I miss Wolfe but all my tears for her going are gone. I think that I only feel sad because I stopped talking to EVERYONE else. And this is the best part I don't want to let go of sadness' hand. I want to feel something. If he or she leaves then I am empty and have nothing to do but feel cold and out of myself. And I am hungry. I am always SOO hungry. And a few days ago I found it harder to breathe like the air was dead or too still, or my lungs just did not want air. I find myself not breathing much at all. I am not sure how I feel about it. I think that the turning might be happening faster than it should be. I want to look for my maker and I want to ask him questions but I can never find him. I thought that I might have seen him last night when I was outside. But if I did he would not speak to me. And I have been seeing things and smelling things. All food now smells ... like... well it smells like... rotting food. And then I go to a window and out there smells like rotting flesh. I had trouble even swallowing water this morning after a ran up the steps. It was bad, I was so out of breath as though I don't know it was like I just couldn't breathe at all. Not until I made myself slow down. 

This is going to be the funniest thing you have ever heard me say. I found a small time job, kinda like a freelancer, to pull weeds for an hour or 5 all day out in the sun while it is going to be 55 without the sight of clouds. Well, I am going to have to go Time for lights out and I am getting sleepy. I haven't been sleeping very well the past few days.

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