The Dairy of A Vampire

This is the Dairy of a 15-year-old vampire named Vladimira. She lives with her human family and she hates that she can't get the right food. She has never tasted human blood before and her mother and father are pushing her ever closer to trying some of them. But, of course, they don't know that she is a vampire.


69. Entry 69; Sat, Mar 11, 2017

I don't know why, but ti feels as though the happiest, and carefree part of me is just gone. Like it was there and now it isn't. I have a theory one that I will not share but I do have a theory as to why it feels this way. It feels like a- um- a vampire? Yes, a vampire came a sucked out all of my joy and happiness from my heart and just left a hole not knowing what to fill it with. I am sad and lonely and I can't do a think about it. Blood is not working to heal this and I have asked the moonlight to help me but she is giving me no answer that I can hear. She is taking some of it away and giving me the thoughts that are saying I sound like a victim and I am not one so I should stop acting like I am one. Those are followed by tears and the thoughts that many worst things have happened to people. Lots of things that I can't even name because I don't know where to start with those. My heart thought it feels like it was used and then dumped on my doorstep after I was blissfully happy about not having it. Even as I write this I feel as though one, I am being watched and two like I am not even in my body. All I can think about is crying and willing all things of life out of me as my heart craves the touch of someone who would be glad to take it and hold it until it stopped beating. My heart craves the touch of death's bony fingers wrapping around it and holding it making it feel hollow before he doesn't let it beat again. My heart wants death right now but I am not giving into it because I know what happens from thoughts and feelings like that. Things that I don't want to happen. I like life. Yeah, sometimes it is not the best but when has life even been the best that it could ever be? Why try to say something that I KNOW to be flause when I can tell you what I DO know? I know that the way I feel is how god knows how many people feel this way every day of their lives. They lived so I can too. I am not a victume, no. In fact everyone who can be depressed for days on end is not a victum, in fact they have more power of will than I will ever have. People who can live day in and day out with one feeling of being empty and so sad that you think you will break at any moment are about the strongest people you will ever meet. I mean they don't go running away to tye a rope on a tree or to the closest bottle of some posin thing that will kill them. So what I feel right now is nothing to what they feel. I know that but it doesn't feel that way. And I pieced this together; humans, even the dead ones, are made to be like that. We are MADE to think that way unless you were raised differtantly. I was raised in a city so I was raised to think that way. Of course, that is a steory type but I think that it is very true. Well, I think I got everything off of my chest. So I am going to leave it at that and I don't know do one of these some other day? I don't know when that day would be but at some point I will.

Join MovellasFind out what all the buzz is about. Join now to start sharing your creativity and passion
Loading ...