forever

The event changed everything, but a story can’t have a central theme unless there are walls to support it, roads that take you there and on, because I can’t just give you a fact and you understand it fully until I explain it. So here it is; I love Harry Styles, but the roads that I take you on to understand may not be one’s that you really want to travel, so heed the signs on the barren roadsides, and understand. I’ll tell you about the days, thirty before and thirty after, encompassing Harry’s attempted suicide.

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20. 15 days before

15 DAYS BEFORE

"Depression in it's darkest form" Liam says. We are sitting outside the studio, watching Niall skate board and Zayn try to walk on his hands. Harry is at home with a specialist that has flown in to speak with him and prescribe some pills for him. "i don't know what to do," I admit, looking at my feet instead of focusing on liam's pity, i'm sick of pity, i want a solution. "its like he has everything that could be possibly wrong with hi happening at once." "You dont think he's suicidal?" Liam whispers, as if he is scared to place the idea out in the open, though we all know it has been cycling in our minds since THE DAY. When i get home, Harry is fast asleep in his bed and a note from the doctor is waiting for me, with instructions on when he should take his pills and signs i have to watch out for. As i go into his room, the first thing that makes me smile is Harry, splayed out on his bed with his mouth wide open, i crawl in next to him being careful not to wake him and i quickly fall asleep, hardly caring i have not changes or even removed my shoes.

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