Eucatastrophe ~ h.s.

This isn't how I planned any aspect of my life to occur.

The plan was simple: Finish university with a 4.0 GPA, Get a well-paying corporate job that's more intense than the assistant job I've now, Find a man that loves me for me, Get married at a gorgeous ceremony, Have beautiful children, Grow old with the man of my dreams and watch our kids mature right before our eyes, and Then fall deeper and deeper in love with our time together.

That Night wasn't supposed to happen. My life wasn't supposed to turn out like this.

*Contains: Language, mild sexual content, and a bit of violence. Content could be triggering for some.*

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52. ✗ fifty ✗

SHAY

My eyes drift open from the magnificent dream I was having about my baby girl, leaving me staring at darkness. A loud yawn leaves my lips and I cover my mouth with my hand to suppress the sound from a sleeping Harry behind me. I'd still be asleep if it weren't for the soreness in my breasts and the unbearable urge to pee.

Today had been a long day of finding out her gender and then shopping for the essentials like a crib, changing table, and anything else Harry thought that she would need in her room. I honestly don't think all the stuff we bought will fit in her room, but I just couldn't get Harry to stop. He was on a mission and I was just there for company I suppose, which wasn't all-bad.

I get out of bed with my hand on my stomach as I hurry towards the bathroom to do my business. One thing about pregnancy that I hate; besides the soreness and mood swings, is the urge to pee every other hour. It gets quite ridiculous if I'm being honest.

I do my business quickly before washing my hands and stumbling back into the dark room, ready to climb back in bed and cuddle up with Harry. He always seems to help me sleep, even when I can't get comfortable. My eyes squint towards the bed out of confusion before approaching the emptiness that lies there.

"Harry?" I question, not seeing him in bed.

I don't even know if he had been in bed before I got up, I know he was there when I fell asleep last night. I look to the clock on the bedside table to see that it's just after two in the morning. We had gone to bed at nearly midnight for our excitement of the day being too much.

"Harry?" I ask again, looking about the clean room.

I gather no response, only the silence of the night. But then I hear it.

The soft sounds of the piano downstairs in the lounge. The tune is of a moderate pace and gets louder and louder as I approach the music. I'm quiet as I tiptoe down the steps and into the lounge. Harry's back is to me from his place in front of the keys. As I get closer I realize that he's singing softly as well, the beautiful sound warming my heart. The song itself causes my cheeks to flush and tears to well in my eyes.

"Gotta hold on easy as I let you go. Gonna tell you how much I love you, though you think you already know. I remember I thought you looked like an angel wrapped in pink, so soft and warm. You've had me wrapped around your finger since the day you were born."

Harry's voice is absolutely angelic to the ears as his voice carries around the quiet room. I can hear the truth in his voice and see the way his fingers tickle the keys at a reasonable pace. He clears his voice and pauses playing before carrying on to the chorus with ease.

"You're beautiful, baby, from the outside in. Chase your dreams but always know the road that'll lead you home again. Go on, take on this whole world; but to me you know you'll always be my little girl."

The tears are now freely falling as I cross my arms over my chest and hold a hand over my mouth. I don't want to spook Harry and halt the music that he brings to this house, having never truly seen or heard his talent.

Harry's sang in front of me before, like in the car or when he's in the shower, but never whilst making music of his own. I've never seen him play the piano or the guitar. I've known that he can since of course having that in-home studio in his last house. Now that I have heard his true talent, I never want him to stop.

"Someday some boy will come and ask me for your hand; but I won't say 'yes' to him unless I know he's the half that makes you whole, and he has a poet's soul, and the heart of a man's man. I know he'll say that he's in love but between you and me, he won't be good enough."

And that's when I make a noise, something between a sob and a squeak, causing Harry to jump slightly in his position hunched over the keys. The music halts as he turns round quickly and spotting me in the center of the room surrounded by darkness, tears spilling out onto my cheeks. A flash of worry takes over his features almost immediately and I can tell he's holding back from running over to me.

"Shay, why are you crying, baby? Don't cry."

"That was just so beautiful, Harry." I whimper out, trying to dry the tears from my face with the backs of my hands. I curse to myself and send Harry a small smile. "Damn these pregnancy hormones." His face softens lightly before he smiles.

"Did I wake you?"

I shake my head and walk up to him as he swivels all the way around on the stool. He opens his arms for me and pulls my body onto his lap. He takes the pad of his thumb and helps wipe the tears away from my makeup-less face.

"I just woke to use the toilet and when I came back you weren't there." I say. "I followed the music." Harry's cheeks blush and he knows that he's been caught. "You're amazing, you know that. Your voice is incredible. What you were singing, My Little Girl, how do you know it?" I wonder.

I know the song is originally by Tim McGraw, a country singer from the states. But here in England we don't listen to a lot of country music nor do loads of us love it. I think I heard it from Moxy, if I'm being honest, which is quite surprising. She spent a summer in the south, grew a liking to country music, especially Tim McGraw, but you'd never know it.

"Saw a video of SoMo doing a cover of it while back."

"I like your version one hundred times better than the original, or even SoMo's version." I admit, leaning into him and resting my head against his shoulder. "Never actually heard you play before."

"Guess I just don't like to show off." I giggle and close my eyes, breathing in his scent.

"You should show off more often, especially with that beautiful song. You have a way with the keys."

"Figured it was the perfect one to sing on a day like this."

"Well, it's not yesterday anymore." Harry simply shrugs and plants a few kisses against my neck.

"It's still so surreal." Harry admits, wrapping his arm around me completely and resting his large hand atop my stomach. I open my eyes and stare at his hand in the dim light of the lamp beside the piano. "Can't believe you're having a girl." I smile and lift my head to press a kiss to Harry's cheek.

"I quite like it when you refer to her as our girl or we're having a girl." I admit.

Whenever he says my baby or that you're having a girl it just feels as if I'm in this on my own. I don't like the feeling it brings, loneliness.

"I have a question for you, pertaining to the subject matter of course." Harry begins, smiling down at my stomach as I place my hand on top of his. The size of our hands are dramatic, his almost spanning the entirety of the bump that lay hidden beneath.

"Can't it wait 'til morning? I'm exhausted and it's two-fifteen in the morning." Harry pouts before shaking his head.

"I can't wait that long."

"Alright then, carry on."

"Feel free to think about it as much as possible and you can say no, I won't be mad at all. I really want you to consider it though, but know you won't hurt my feelings if you say no. Just know that if you do say yes, you'll make me one very happy man and I'll love you so much it'll basically hurt inside."

I look to Harry as his tongue darts across his lips before he clears his throat. I can tell he's getting nervous, for what I've no clue.

"I was wondering if you would be open to the idea of allowing me to adopt her?"

"What?" I ask breathlessly, the feeling of the all the air in my lungs being knocked away at one simple question. I can't be certain if I heard him right.

"I want to adopt her, Shay, so that she'll legally be mine. I want this for us and for her. I want to be her dad, to hear her call me daddy. I want to watch her grow up in front of my eyes until it pains me to see her age. I want to take her to school in the mornings and pick her up afterwards, greeting her with a kiss and a tight hug because she'll be one of the only things on my mind whilst at work, besides you, of course. I want to raise her as ours, not yours and his."

I stare at him in the darkness, the overwhelming feeling to cry ever present now, but it's not because I'm sad. I'm in fact quite the opposite of sad right now.

This is a big commitment for Harry, it would mean that she would be our daughter; she'll be legally his. He'll hold a legal obligation to be there for her, to provide for her, and to care for her... always and forever.

"Is this what you really want?" Harry nods his head, his eyes sparkling as he lifts his thumb up underneath my eye. He wipes the tears away and peppers kissing along the damp area.

"I want this Shay, just as much as I want you."

"Would it be crazy for me to agree right away without thinking much of it?" I question, watching Harry's face light up completely.

Before I know it, his arms have scooped me up so that he's holding me bridal style and he's standing on his feet. I giggle lightly and wrap my arms around his neck, holding on tightly, though I know he won't drop me. He swiftly leans forward and pecks my lips.

"Let me show you how grateful I am for this." He says, his voice dropping to a deep, husky whisper.

I gulp nervously, having a feeling that this will in fact not be stopping at second base tonight; this very well could go a step farther. I can't say that I'm completely opposed to the idea either. I've been thinking about having his hands on my body ever since our first, and only, joint shower two weeks ago.

"Please." He pleads, his lust filled eyes pulling me from my trance.

"Okay." Harry's grin grows as he pecks me lips again.

"Thank you beautiful." He says and proceeds to carry me up the wooden steps with ease.

He carries me into the darkness of our room, making no move to flip on a light or anything as he takes me towards our bed. He swiftly shifts me in his arms so that now I've my legs wrapped around his waist and my covered bump is pressed against his bare torso. I gasp at the quick switch of positions, having been taken aback by it.

"I promise you that I'll take care of you. Just tell me to stop if you need me to."

A rush of anxiety flashes through me at his words. I think I'm ready for us to be intimate, but definitely not anywhere ready to have sex with him. Harry must have sensed the apprehension on my still body because he immediately shook his head.

"Don't worry, we're not doing that."

"Oh," I blush, having nothing else to say, "I just wanted to make sure." I mumble as Harry chuckles.

"Just relax."

Those were the last words that left his lips as he attaches his pink lips to mine hungrily. All the sleep that my body had been yearning for is soon forgotten when our lips dance together. The lustful look in his eyes before he had attached our lips only has me deepening the kiss.

I kiss back with force as my hands fumble with the hair tie in Harry's hair. All I really want right now, contrary to how I was feeling at the hospital earlier, is to run my fingers through his strands and massage his scalp with my nails. I soon free his hair, letting the ringlets drop down to his shoulders as I throw the tie onto the floor. Finding it later is the least of my worries.

My hands go to attack at the loose strands, earning a deep moan from Harry's throat, which has me turned on further, if possible. I know he likes it when I tug at his curls, the moans that leave his lips every time a dead give-away.

Harry's large hands rest on my bum, giving it a tight squeeze and causing a moan to pour out onto our joined lips. I feel Harry smile against me, the thought of his smile alone triggering my chest to rise and fall heavily. His hands press my lower half against his and I feel his bulge growing harder in just moments. I had no idea the effect I had on him.

At the feeling of the friction between us, Harry glides his tongue across my bottom lip to which I open my mouth for him. His tongue massages mine gently all whilst keeping the pressure between our bodies consistent.

Softy, he drops me onto the bed so that my back meets with the mattress surface. Harry stands at the foot of the bed, his chest rising and falling as his eyes wonder my body. I sudden surge of confidence runs through me as I bite my lip and tug on my t-shirt.

"Would you mind?" I question, my voice merely above a whisper.

The infamous Harry Styles smirk shows again as his knees make contact between my legs on the unmade bed. His large hands grasp the bottom of my tee before pulling it upwards and in one swift motion it's being thrown to the floor.

"My God-" The words tumble from Harry's parted lips and he visibly gulps.

I don't need to look at myself to know that I've got Harry this awestruck because of my lack of bra. The damn thing is too uncomfortable to deal with during the day, let alone at night. Plus, you need to let the girls breath once and a while.

"You." He hovers over me and connects our lips in a quick kiss. "Are." Another kiss meets my lips. "So." His lips trail down to my chin as my eyes flutter closed in the darkness. "Goddamn." His lips find the crook of my neck, leaving a sweet kiss there, before moving. "Beautiful." With the last word his lips have reached the spot that will have me moaning in seconds.

His lips tickle against my skin before sucking harshly on the spot just below my hair. My moans fill the otherwise silent room, promoting him to suck harder until my nails are raking Harry's back. My legs lift to wrap around Harry's waist, pulling his body down onto mine immediately.

I need to feel contact between us, even through multiple layers, it it's the last thing that I do in this world.

"Feisty," Harry's lips pull from mine and I have no doubt that there's a bruise on my skin, oddly enough I don't give a damn, "I like that." I blush at his words as his eyes scan me down in the dimly lit room. Harry grinds his crotch against mine, a surprised gasp leaving my lips along with a loud sexually frustrated whine.

"Do you feel what you do to me Shay?" I nod my head furiously at the feeling of his bulge. "You're the only one that's ever been able to make me this hard, this fast." I blush at his words before a quick kiss is pressed to my lips.

No other words are spoken as Harry's lips travel down my neck, the fingertips on his right hand following in suit, creating goosebumps in their path. Just when I thought that his lips trailing down my body was enough, Harry takes me by complete surprise and latches his mouth onto one of my breasts, another shocked gasp leaving my lips as well as a jolt of excitement that races through me.

I haven't been this intimate with someone since my last year in sixth form/early years of university. The appeal of messing around with rich strangers wasn't as engaging as I got older, but I was quite all right with that. I didn't the party lifestyle to fulfill my needs of fun as I grew older. The feeling of his mouth on my body is almost foreign for me, having missed the touch of another for so long.

His expert tongue swirls around the area as his right hand goes to my free breast, massaging it gently for he knows how tender they are. My breathing is raged now; coming out in short puffs as Harry pecks my left breast before switching sides. I'm at a loss of words, sounds, and anything I could possibly do in the moment. Just having his mouth on me makes me feel so good, almost makes the soreness just disappear for a while.

"That feels so good." I purr out, shocking myself when the words tumble from my lips.

I'm not usually very vocal during these sorts of things, makes me feel embarrassed and uncomfortable even. Harry just brings out a new side of me I suppose. I bite my lip seconds later, hoping nothing else can squeeze past in my vulnerable state.

"What about this?"

The vibration from his words alone feels much better, but it's not what he meant. My eyebrows crunch together in confusion when all of a sudden his hand makes contact with my covered core.

Responsively, my hand shoots forward and grips Harry's arm, pulling it away from my center as a yelp leaves my lips. Harry stills and snaps his head up in my direction. Fuck! I feel my heart sink at the realization that I've just let what's happened in my past affect my life with Harry in the bedroom.

Harry looks up at me with parted lips as I stare back at him, my cheeks flushed. I quickly release his arm and drop my head down against the pillow. I want to groan and smack myself so hard right now. I can't believe I just did that.

"I'm sorry, was just a reflex."

"Do you want me to stop?" I bite my lip and pull my head from the pillow, slowly shaking my head in response. I feel like crying again, the urge causes my throat to tighten up and my eyes to sting. "Do you trust me, Shay?"

"Of course I do. I love you." I breathe out slowly, still staring at the ceiling.

"I love you too, just take a deep breath."

I do as he says as his thumb places pressure on my covered core once again, my breath immediately catching.

This time, instead of grabbing Harry, my lower half jerks upwards towards his hand, now desperately needing his touch. My hands claw at the sheets underneath me before Harry captures one of my hands with his free hand and place it on his head.

"I like when you play with my hair." He admits, his chin resting on my sternum.

Both my hands glide into his curls, massaging the scalp as I watch him intensely. He pulls his chin from my skin and proceeds to place chaste kisses down the valley of my breasts and onto my baby bump. I witness a smile break out on his lips, causing my own smile to show.

Even as he is pleasing me, he still takes time to acknowledge the little one using my energy all day, every day. Although I don't think right now is a great time to acknowledge the little one, especially with the immense pleasure I'm feeling.

Harry's thumb presses down against my covered nub, sending a jolt of excitement through me and yet again my hips buck. His chuckle escapes as his free hand wraps around my waist and places itself onto my stomach, holding me down.

"Shorts on or off, love?" He asks, his lips stopping just above the waistband of my layers. I gulp as my head falls back onto the pillows.

Do I want him to take them off? Do I want to expose myself to him up close just yet?

"Off."

My words leave my lips without a second thought as Harry's smile widens. He sits up and slides the cotton shorts down my legs until they're free and being tossed wherever my tee has gone. By instinct I go to pull my knees up to my chest, but am stopped by Harry's hands on my upper thighs.

"Don't."

I watch as Harry slides down the bed so that his face is flush against my stomach. His lips press to the soft skin as his eyes stare up at me, the look he's giving me driving me absolutely mad. I almost lose all self control when Harry's lips kiss directly along the waistband of my knickers.

My breathing has increased significantly and my hands are tugging on Harry's hair. Suddenly he blows out against the covered area, causing me to whine loudly at the feeling of his hot breath against me. I can't imagine what I'll be doing, or screaming, once the barrier is removed.

"I won't last very long." I admit, feeling my cheeks tinge pink. With my libido so high, I can only last so long like this.

Harry smirks up at me from his position between my legs and chuckles lightly. His hot breath causing my own breathing to pick up as his fingers hook underneath the band of my lacy panties.

"Let's skip the teasing then, shall we?"

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