5SOS one shots (boys x Reader)


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78. Spaces Between Us

Calum’s silent, not saying anything, eyebrows scrunched together and thick lips parted.

 

Then— “You’re… joking, right? Like— this is your idea of a prank? it’s a shitty one, by the way. But— I mean. You got me all—” he gestures to his face, one eyebrow arched now. “— so it worked. Your shitty prank.”

 

Y/N presses her lips together tightly, teeth sinking into her bottom lip. “I’m not,” she breathes out so quietly, but Calum hears it, and he’s back to frowning so hard that there are creases on his forehead. “I’m serious, Calum.”

 

“You want to break up with me, after we’ve been together for— are you okay? Like, genuinely. Are you okay? Because from my point of view, the whole time we’ve been dating has been the best fucking thing ever, and now you’re just— breaking up with me?” Calum gapes at her, blinking wide and hurt brown eyes over at her.

 

“Did I, like— fuck. Did I do something? I mean, we’re good. Right? Like. I don’t remember fighting with you about anything. And I know I haven’t forgotten any, like, important dates. I know I haven’t done any stupid shit. So— what the fuck did I miss? What did I do?”

 

“You didn’t do anything, Calum,” she tells him, almost tiredly.

 

Because— she is. Tired, that is. She’d been thinking it over for quite a while, and she’d tried to talk herself out of doing it—doing this—so many times, only to come back to the same conclusion that she’d come to when the thought first popped into her head.

 

The thing is, Calum’s Calum Hood. He’s in a band that tours constantly, almost never staying in one place for longer than a couple of weeks, and she’s— well. Y/N’s scared, in the simplest of terms. She’s never been in a long distance relationship before, let alone been in a relationship with a member of a band. A band that is, mind you, pretty fucking famous now.

 

So she’s scared, and she thinks it’s reasonable that she’s scared. There’s a part of her that’s saying if she never takes the risk, she’ll miss out on something that could damn well be the best thing of her life. But there’s another part that’s screaming over the other, saying that she’ll only get hurt in the end because— look at him. Look at their fans. How is their relationship (that could still be classified as quite new) going to survive that?

 

It’s not, the bitter part of her mind speaks.

 

So Y/N inhales sharply, looking back at him. He’s still frowning at her, looking part confused and part angry— like he doesn’t even know what he’s angry about.

 

“Look. We—” she cuts herself off with a huff, running her fingers through her hair. “— we’re not… exclusive,alright? I mean, we are, but we’ve only been dating for, what? Barely three months? And I’ve been lucky enough to be, like, touring around with you guys, so we’re always together. But—”

 

She blows out a breath between her lips again. “I’ve been on the road with you, Calum. I know what touring’s like. And now you’re going to tour until— fucking Christmas, or even New Year’s. I know the people you come into contact with everyday. And I’m not saying you’ll cheat, but— why would you want to settle when you’ve got—” she gestures at nothing. “— all of that?”

 

Calum opens his mouth, as though to say something. But then his teeth snap together as he shuts his mouth, brows forming the same damn frown again. “… You’re breaking up with me because, let me get this straight—” he lets out a breath of laughter that’s full of mirth and spite. “— you think that, what? I’m gonna… leave you for some random pretty face?”

 

“It’s not that, it’s just—” she sighs, never finishing, darting her eyes to the ground. Because… she does’t evenknow what it is.

 

Calum doesn’t give up. He arches a brow over at her. “Then what? You don’t think you can handle the long distance or something? The being apart?”

 

Y/N’s eyes glance back up at him, and it’s like he just— gets it. That that’s what’s eating at her. The long distance thing.

 

He frowns even harder, and when he speaks, his voice cracks a little. “You don’t think it’s… worth it?”

 

“I—” do, she doesn’t finish, because then he’ll just question her even more, fight back even harder.

 

Calum’s silent, waiting for an answer. But Y/N never gives him one. And he seems to realise this, that she’s not going to answer. He tugs at his hair, almost a little too roughly, scoffing in disbelief, staring at her with wide eyes.

 

Unbelievable,” he mutters under his breath, but the sound carries. “Un-fucking-believable. We haven’t even tried it yet and you’re already giving up on me,” he scoffs again.

 

His eyes form narrow slits, glaring at her. “Tell me something. Did I ever mean anything to you? Or, like.” Calum lets out a laugh— harsh and mean. “Was i just— someone to pass your fucking time? Someone to fucking mess with? Because I was there, and you were— lonely, or some other fucked up shit like that?”

 

No,” she raises her voice slightly, tone incredulous. “What kind of person do you think I am? I wouldn’t do that! I just—”

 

“You just—?” Calum prompts, tone mocking and full of spite when she doesn’t finish. “You just— what? Huh? You just fucking what, Y/N? Because from where I’m standing— it’s not fucking rocket science. All I was to you was someone to pass the time. Someone to keep you company. Someone to fucking warm your bed, right?” He very nearly spits out.

 

Y/N inhales sharply, the words cutting through her. She feels her eyes start to gather water in the corner, and her vision’s already starting to get blurry. “Calum, I swear that’s not what you—” she starts. Tries so desperately to explain herself. To say the words that she is terrified of losing him, because if he already means so much to her now, how the hell will she even make it through the day once they’ve been together for much longer and he’s realised that he doesn’t—shouldn’t—settle for her.

 

Calum shakes his head, eyes that were once always warm and welcoming— now sharp and deadlier than she’s ever seen. “Fuck off,” and Y/N has to clench her fists by her sides to stop herself from physically flinching back from his tone. “You don’t want to try, then fine. I’m not going to force you. Besides—” he scoffs again, eyes darting all over her face before he’s scoffing again and shaking his head.

 

Why would I want to be with someone who doesn’t even believe in our relationship?”

 

She parts her lips, ready to say something— but nothing comes out.

 

Calum looks at her again— jaw working and tensed, eyes still glaring straight at her. “Guess I was wrong about you,” he mutters finally, then he’s shaking his head and brushing past her— making extra sure to ensure that even their sleeves do not touch.

 

And then he’s— gone.

 

And Y/N’s left standing there, alone, head tilted back and jaw clenched, but with tears still managing to make their presence known by sliding down her cheeks. And she’s left wondering— what if she’s just made one of the biggest mistakes of her life?

 

Because—and it’s been barely a minute since Calum’s walked out—she already thinks it is.

 
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