5SOS one shots (boys x Reader)


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52. Leaving Pt 2

So relationships aren’t perfect. Luke knows that. Y/N knows that. Hell, everyone knows that – even relationships in goddamn fairytales aren’t perfect.

 

But Luke never thought that he’d be in one of those relationships where all they seem to be doing is making each other so fucking tired when they’re supposed to be making each other happy and free. Which is why he’d called her and called her and called her until she’d picked up again, asking “what else do you fucking want from me” in the most tired and dejected tone that it actually chipped at his heart a little because he’d caused that.

 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Luke had repeated, breath shortening like he’d just run a marathon as he tugged at his hair painfully and slid against the door that led into his hotel room. “Please, baby, ‘m sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t – I didn’t mean to. I – I’m a shit person and –” his breath hitches. It’s like he can’t breathe but his heart’s beating fast, so fast, and it’s like it may burst out from his ribcage. “I’m so sorry, Y/N, I’m so fucking sorry.” He’d managed to choke out.

 

Breathe, Luke,” her soothing voice had come through – voice thicker than normal, like she’d been crying, but comforting, nonetheless. “Deep breaths, Luke. Come on. Deep breaths.

 

“I can’t. I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe.” Luke had choked out and his free hand started clawing at his chest, like he was trying to rip through the skin to physically pull out his heart and lungs and whatever the fuck else, but then she was talking again and he found himself calming down, just by listening to her talking.

 

And when Luke had calmed down from his first ever panic attack, Y/N had just – hung up with the parting words of “please don’t call me again,” and Luke reckoned he actually heard his heart shatter this time.

 

He listened to her – didn’t call her again. But she said nothing about texting. So that was what he did. He still texted her like things between them weren’t crumbling apart. It was all an endless stream of apologies at first, saying that he loved her (God, he loved her so fucking much) and that he was sorry, so sorry. She never read any of the texts and Luke decided that the iMessage thing was more of a bane than a blessing. Then he texted her throughout the day – any random shite that came to him, anything he saw that reminded him of her – till he couldn’t fucking take it anymore and he told the boys and John and whoever else they were meant to be meeting with that he was going back home for a week, at least.

 

(He thought they’d be mad, think he was a pussy for needing physical reassurance that he and Y/N were still a mendable pair. They sent him to the airport with smiles and wishes of good luck.)

 

So Luke gets flowers. It’s cheesy and she might roll her eyes at it, but in the end everyone’s got a little weakness for another person bringing them flowers. He gets flowers and he gets in a cab, headed for home with a cracked heart that’s beating way too fast.

 

He opens the door, taking in a deep breath, and then calling out a “Babe?” that echoes against the walls. No one answers. It’s not like he expected someone to answer because he knows Y/N is still fairly pissed at him, but it never hurt to try.

 

Only – she’s not there at all. He checks everywhere, but she’s not there. In fact, it’s like there hasn’t been someone living in the damn place for at least two weeks. (He’d been gone for two weeks.) His pulse is racing and it feels like his whole body is vibrating as he flings open the wardrobe – and all that’s left is the few things that he never brings with him on tour. Everything else is gone.

 

The next thing Luke’s aware of, he’s got his phone held up to his ear and the dial tone is ringing. Maybe it’s because he hasn’t called her in over a week, or maybe it’s because he hasn’t texted her yet, since the last text was exactly a day and a half ago. But she picks up, almost sounds worried when she greets him with a “hello?”

 

“You left?” Luke near demands. He’s hurt and there actually is a possibility that he may break down crying soon, but all he hears is anger in his tone. Anger and betrayal. ”You fucking left?! And you didn’t think to fucking tell me?! What the fuck. How could you do –”

 

Hurts, doesn’t it?” Y/N interrupts, voice soft.

 

Luke blinks, brows still knotted together tightly in the middle of his forehead. “Huh?”

 

The whole abrupt leaving thing. Hurts, doesn’t it?” She repeats and Luke’s eyes widen with realisation.

 

“Y/N, I’m sorry. I – I don’t know why I didn’t tell you I was leaving. I just – I fucked up and –”

 

Leave it.” Her voice is sharp. Cold. Detached. Hurt. (And Luke kind of wants to hit himself for it.) “I know I don’t mean half as much to you as you do to me.” Luke makes a sound that he’s never heard himself make before and he opens his mouth to say something but no words come out. When he thinks he’s got his voice back, she’s beating him to the punch, “We’re done,” and then the call’s cut.

 

And Luke’s pretty sure he hears his heart actually shatter into a million fragmented and unfixable pieces this time.

 
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