Forever and Always

Alaina has been best friends with the adorable dimple faced curly haired boy, Harry Styles since she was born. They're a week apart and were always stuck by each other for as long as they could remember. She started to develop feelings for him in middle school while he's had feelings for her since they were little. Except they're both oblivious to know how the other one feels about each other. Their lives are far from being picture perfect, especially Alaina's. Her dad is dead and her uncle abuses her every day at home while her mother is not around. She can't tell anyone about it...including her best friend, the person that she trusts the most. On top of that Harry gets a new girlfriend named Kendall and he starts to ditch Alaina for her. It shatters her heart and it makes her miss the times they had together. The times where he didn't cancel their plans or ditch her just to be with his snobby girlfriend, and when he showed how much he cared for her. No matter how many times Harry tries to fix things with his best friend, Kendall has to get in between. With all the drama that's going on between them, will they finally confess their love for each other....Or will everything come crashing down on them and they lose each other forever? *CHAPTERS 2,3, & 37 ARE NOT SHOWING UP ON THE APP! PLEASE READ THEM ONLINE, THANKS!

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36. Chapter 35

Chapter 35 

 

Alaina’s POV 

 

 

“Alright, you have everything?" Harry asked me.  

 

"Yeah," I replied.  

 

It's finally Sunday afternoon, which means I can finally go home today. After my tests were done on Wednesday, Shane said everything was pretty good except he told me to lay low until my broken rib officially heals. It should take a month or two so I won't be able to do certain things for a while. I can still go back to school, which I know is going to be awful but thankfully I get to see my friends again. During my last few days here, it’s been so boring and I just couldn’t stand it anymore. I'm so glad that I finally get to go home and actually be in my bed. Even though it's been 5 days it feels like I've been here longer than that.  

 

On Wednesday, Harry spent the night with me so I don't feel alone but the next day he had to leave because he had to go back to school. It sucked to watch him go because I was going to be alone for 6 hours but he ended coming back after along with our other friends which was nice. But they didn’t stay long because I got emotional so my mom had to sit with me until I calmed down. Then I was tired so I didn't really have visitors for the rest of the day. On Thursday, I was pretty much all by myself again but Harry came by even though I still wasn't feeling myself. 

 

He's been very patient and gentle with me for the past few days and I'm very thankful for that because I don't know how I would be doing if it weren’t for him. I'm surprised he didn't give up and left to go hang out with Kendall. Maybe she finally understood that he has to pay attention to me too and not her all the time. Hopefully she did because I just want all this drama to be over between us. I just want everything to be over and go back to normal just like the way it used to be before she came along. I mean, it was the second time Harry had to talk to her about how she acts around me since she didn't seem to keep her promise the last time so I'm really hoping that she gave in for his sake.  

 

"Okay, let's go. I told your mum that I would bring you home," he said.  

 

I nod and tie my hair up into a messy bun before grabbing my bag and following him out into the hall. I'm so glad I can walk still and don't have to use a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I don't know what I would do if I wasn't able to do that again. Jamie didn't break anything else in my body other than my rib, which still hurts like hell when I don't take my pain medication for a certain amount of time. My neck still hurts too when I try to move my head but other than that it's fine once I take something for it as well. According to my mom and Shane, I'm very lucky.  

 

When Harry and I got outside, he leads me to his car and I notice that he tries to help me climb up into the front seat even though I politely told him that I was okay to do it myself but he wouldn't listen. He's that kind of person that would help anyone even if they really don't need it. He even helped me buckle my seat belt when I was able to do that as well. I may still be in pain but right now I feel fine because I took my pain medication before I left. I get Harry was just being his usual self by being helpful but it's not like I can't do anything myself now.  

 

"Thanks," I said to him when he got me buckled.  

 

"No problem," he replied and shuts my door and walks over to his side.  

 

God, I just want to go home even though I don’t feel emotionally safe there. I know Jamie is gone but I still feel like he’s going to burst through the door and hurt me again. I’ve even had that gut feeling after I woke up from nightmares during the night while I was staying here which prevented me from sleeping. I also still flinch if someone touches me at random and I just want it all to go away. I want everything to be back to normal again without getting me scared even though I'm safe now. Hopefully it all goes away soon. 

 

I sigh and then Harry gets into his side, closing his door behind him. Just as he started the car, his phone rings making my heart throb in my chest with unease. I'm really hoping that's not Kendall again because he already talked to her earlier before it was time for me to leave. There were times when she would interrupt our time together while he was visiting me for the past few days and it really started to bug me but I just let him go and talk with her. But he never left me no matter how many times she begged him to hang out with her and that made me kind of happy. 

 

He would just lie and say that he had to help Anne with something or he had studying to do and wanted to do it alone. It's just so messed up. Every time he tries to fix things with me after he blows me off, she always to get in the way again and it makes me so mad. I can't wait until I'm out of here in a few months so I don't have to deal with her anymore. Harry will still be dating her but thankfully I won't be around her anymore.  

 

"Kendall again?" I asked him.

 

"Yeah," he sighed as he shuts his door before putting on his seat belt.  

 

"Go ahead, talk to her. I don't care," I sighed.  

 

Okay that was kind of a lie. I do care but at the same time I don't because it's his girlfriend and I have to accept that.  

 

"No. I talked to her already. I’ll talk to her later," he said.  

 

"Okay,” I mumbled.  

 

“Are you alright?” He asked all concerned.  

 

I nod, even though I know that I’m not really okay. I just don’t want to worry Harry. Usually he knows whether I’m lying or not but this time he doesn’t. He seems to believe me and turns off his phone so he doesn't have to deal with hearing his phone going off from Kendall’s messages and then we were off to my house. During the car ride, everything was quiet except the radio in the car was softly playing some music from Harry’s phone. I put my head against the window and just scroll through my phone reading messages that people that I knew have been sending me through Facebook or text message.  

 

I notice the worried look on Harry's face as he drives and I can tell that he wants to touch me but he doesn't want to startle me. I just feel so bad that he wants to do what he always did to me but he can't right now. When he stopped at a red light, I put my head up from the window and gently reach over to put his hand on my knee just to let him know that I want to feel his touch. He gives me a small smile and I couldn't help but do the same. When we arrive at my house, I notice my mom and Shane are still here along with Anne. 

 

Thank god they're off from work on the weekends so I wouldn't have to be here alone. I don't think I'll be able to be left alone again. I know I have Harry but still. Jamie could still come back here and try to actually kill me this time since his plan last week failed. After Harry helps me out of the car, he gets my bag out and then I feel him touch my hand, making me flinch back. Harry notices that he startled me and a pained look comes across his face, making me start to feel bad again.  

 

"I’m sorry,” Harry said.  

 

"It's fine," I said.  

 

"No, it's not fine! I should have asked before I touched you," he exclaimed.  

 

Instead of arguing with him, I take his hand linking my fingers with his making him do the same. I feel him squeeze my hand lightly and then we go inside. Just like I expected my mom, Shane, and Anne were in the kitchen talking. They didn't hear us come in so we take off our shoes and I keep holding Harry's hand as he leads me into the kitchen. I try to hide how nervous I am to be back here but he notices.  

 

“Hey, it’s okay,” he said gently.   

 

“Are you sure?” I mumbled. 

 

“I’m positive,” he replied. 

 

I slowly nod and he begins to take my hand again. 

 

“Alaina? Harry? Is that you?” I hear my mom call.  

 

I sigh and he leads me into the kitchen with me kind of clinging onto his arm.  

 

“Yeah, it’s us,” Harry said.  

 

My mom comes over to me and then she gently pulls me in for a hug and I couldn't help but hug her back. I'm glad I have her with me because I don't know what I would do without her. Along with Harry, Anne, Gemma, and Shane, she's all that I have left.  

 

"I'm so glad you're finally home," she said.  

 

"Me too," I mumbled and go over to hug Shane before going over to Anne. 

 

“Welcome home, lovely," she said gently before kissing the top of my head.  

 

“Thank you,” I replied.  

 

“Gemma is coming tomorrow. She’s really excited to see you,” Anne said as she releases me from the hug.  

 

I haven’t seen her since me and Harry’s birthday party which was a month ago. I just wish she came home more often because I miss her a lot. But thankfully she’s coming tomorrow so we’ll be able to catch up.  

 

“I bet,” I smiled.  

 

I heard once Gemma found out that I was hurt, she was really worried. She was so worried that she kept calling Anne every hour or so while I was in the coma to see if I was okay. She even talked to me a few times after I woke up.  

 

“Alaina, do you want something to eat?” My mom asked.  

 

“No, I just want to shower and go to bed. I’m kind of tired. I didn’t sleep much last night,” I replied.  

 

“Okay. If you need anything we’re here,” she reminded me.  

 

I nod and then Harry and I begin to go upstairs.  

 

“Harry…it’s a school night so if you’re spending the night here make sure you two wake up on time,” Anne reminded him 

 

“I know. I promise,” he said.  

 

She nods and goes back to talking with my mom. Okay hopefully they’ll leave us alone for the rest of the afternoon. I just want quiet and I also just want to be with Harry because I feel like we haven't had alone time in forever.  

 

“Oh, Alaina!” My mom called before Harry and I were able to go upstairs.  

 

I sigh and turn around. What now? 

 

“Yes?”  

 

“Leave your door open please,” she said.  

 

“Okay,”  

 

Usually I would argue with her about me leaving my door open but tonight, I don't really have the strength. I bet she's very thankful for that.  

 

“Thank you,” she replied and turns back to talk to Anne again.  

 

Thank god. Harry takes my hand again and then we begin to go upstairs to my room. It was kind of hard walking up because I’m still kind of sore so Harry had to help me up there. He offered to carry me but I declined. When we got into my room, I shut my door partially and drop my bag by the end of my bed. I look around the room and everything still looks the same thankfully. I’m surprised Jamie didn’t mess up it up after he attacked me that day. Or maybe he did but my mom and Shane cleaned it up for me while I was in the hospital. It’s just good to be back in my own room again because being in a hospital room for almost a week is not fun.  

 

“Do you want to lay down?” Harry asked me.  

 

“No…I’m going to go take a shower,” I said.  

 

“Okay. I’ll be in here if you need me,”  

 

I go over to my dresser and grab one of Harry’s t-shirts and boxer shorts that I “stole” before going into the bathroom. I begin to shut the door behind me but I hesitate a little bit. Even though I don’t have a window in there, I’m still nervous to shower in here by myself.  

 

“Uh…can you sit in here with me?” I asked Harry.  

 

“Of course,” he replied.  

 

He didn’t even need to ask why because he obviously knows that I’m still scared of being by myself in my bathroom. I let him come into my bathroom and sits on the toilet cover as I go over to start the shower. When it got to the right temperature, I look over at Harry to let him know that I want him to close his eyes while I get undressed. I know we’ve seen each other naked before but still, it’s not right for him to see me naked since he’s dating someone else. I even don’t want him to see the bruises that Jamie left on my body because he’s just going to get upset that I’m hurt and I don’t want to see that.  

 

Harry seems to get what I want him to do and closes his eyes. As I was getting undressed it was kind of difficult because my muscles are sore but I still manage to get my clothes off without a problem. I even tried to keep myself from looking at myself in the mirror because I know I’m still covered in bruises. I haven’t even looked at myself but I know it’s not a pretty sight. When I finally got my clothes off, I unwrap the bandage I have on my wrist since I have to put on another one later and then carefully take my hair out of my bun before finally stepping into the shower. 

 

I let Harry know that it was okay for him to open his eyes now and then I continue on with my shower. I wash my hair and then put my head under the water coming out of the showerhead. Once everything was rinsed out, I finally manage to look down at my body where I notice all the bruises that Jamie caused me. Dark, black and blue bruises are scattered along my skin and just looking at them makes me want to throw up. I can’t believe Jamie did this to me. 

 

Like what have I done to make him so angry and want to hurt me like this? I’ve been asking myself that question for years but I never got my answer. Suddenly, visions of Jamie towering over me as he screams in my face and beating me over one little thing start to flash in my mind. I gulp back tears as I try to fight back the memories and grab my wash cloth that is hanging inside of the shower.  

 

"Alaina...you okay?" I hear Harry ask, making me jump a little with surprise.  

 

"No," I wanted to say but I want to be strong for him and show that nothing is wrong when there really is. I know how worried he gets so telling him would just make him get even more protective. Even though I want his protection but at the same time I want to recover myself.  

 

"Yeah," I manage to say.  

 

"Okay, just making sure," he replied.  

 

He's still in here like he promised but I still feel unsafe in here. No...don't feel like that, Alaina. You're fine! I take a few deeps breaths to calm myself down and then start to continue on with my shower. After I lather my wash cloth with soap, tears begin to fill up rapidly in my eyes once I start to wash my body which made me scrub even harder, trying to get all the evidence from what Jamie caused off of me. My skin starts to turn red due to how hard I'm scrubbing but I couldn't stop.  

 

More visions from the abuse start to flash in my mind, making me I scrub even harder on every mark on my body, not caring if I cause them to bleed. The more I scrub, the more memories start to come back to me. I hate this! I let out a gasp, choking back on the tears that are streaming down my face and throw the wash cloth on the ground before putting my head against the wall. I close my eyes trying to relax myself and get rid of the memories. I just want to curl up on the floor and cry but I know that won't solve anything or help me recover.  

 

"Alaina?" I hear Harry ask again.  

 

Damn it. He probably heard me crying and he's wondering if I'm okay or not. I sniffle and wipe my eyes before putting my head up.  

 

"I'm fine, Harry," I reminded him, gulping down the lump in my throat.  

 

I rinse off my body and then shut off the shower before reaching out to grab a towel to dry off.  

 

"I'm going into your room while you get dressed if that's okay," he said.  

 

"Y-Yeah.... it’s fine," I replied.  

 

"Okay. I'll just leave the door open a little,"  

 

I hear him walk out, along with the door closing slightly, leaving me alone in the bathroom. I know he's in my bedroom but I still feel scared. With shaky hands, I pull back the curtain and step out of the shower with the towel wrapped around me. I dry off and then I slowly get dressed. It was kind of difficult because I'm kind of still in pain. I should take my medicine before I go to bed so I can sleep tonight. Pulling Harry's long t-shirt over my head, I pick up my towel and hang it up before grabbing my clothes and taking them to the hamper in my room.  

 

Just like I expected, Harry is still here and lying on my bed watching TV. To be honest, I'm glad that he's here with me instead of wasting his time with Kendall. She's been trying to get him to come over but he hasn't left my side. It makes me feel so proud because he's finally starting to stand up for himself and not letting her take advantage of him. I wish they could just end it already but if he's happy with her then I'm going to have to accept it.  

 

"You want to go downstairs?" Harry asked me.  

 

I shake my head. I just to lay in my bed and not do anything for the rest of the day.  

 

"No. I just want to go to bed," I mumbled.  

 

"Okay," he replied. "I'll stay with you,"  

 

"Harry...you really don't-"  

 

"It's not a problem. I want to stay with you," he said, cutting me off.  

 

"Okay," I said.  

 

I throw my clothes into the hamper and comb my hair. Then, I take my pain medicine and slip in under my covers next to Harry before pulling the blankets over me. I sigh with relief when I get comfortable in my bed. I still feel unsafe here but I know nothing is going to happen...right? Harry gets under the covers beside me and before he was able to pull me into his arms, I immediately snuggle against him.  

 

"Don't let me go, Harry," I whispered.  

 

"I promise, Lainey. I'll never let you go," he said. 

 

 

Author’s Note: 

 

I hope you liked this chapter. Please review if you did. As you can see, Alaina is starting to deal with PTSD from the attack. I edited chapter 34 just so I can make this a little bit more realistic. I didn’t want Alaina to just go back home and act like nothing really happened because that’s just not how it goes sometimes with abuse victims.  

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