Spock awoke the first night when Leonard--no, McCoy was off on the way to trial. He looked over to see a empty bed across from him. It occurred to him what McCoy had told him earlier. There was a strong possibility that he would not live another way at his age. Humans were known to fall like flies at the age of one hundred sixty and it was even rarer to see humans live past that age clear into their one hundred seventies. Spock hadn't known that many old terrans in their hundreds before he arrived here. He never met a two hundred year old human in his life. And likely never will. Spock opened the door to the balcony then sat down onto the lawn-chair to watch the dancing aura lights.
The lights were beautiful. The light blue color twirling above the friendly colors, orange, yellow, and red to name a few. He could see several constellations in the sky. Perhaps, this could be different for McCoy. Maybe he just might defy all expectations. Spock considered what that decision also meant. His Katra being lost to everyone. Living forever was not exactly what many people wanted. Spock didn't want to be in a room full of people he barely knew. Missing those who he had known. His katra would never forget. It would be like hell for Spock to be alone. He had anticipated this for so long but the startling idea of it had struck him if he had somehow managed to get his katra there. Long ago Spock had welcomed the idea of being alone from annoyances, so young and hadn't embraced his human half the way he had now. But there was no turning back. He would prefer to meet up with his former crewmates and possibly meet up with the doctor once more if there was such thing as this fabled 'heaven'. McCoy's thoughts on the subject would be that Spock was afraid of living forever. That would be true.
Spock's thoughts drifted toward the aura lights. If the story was true then Pauzi would be living forever, eternally, until his homeplanet was destroyed by its own sun. Perhaps his logic was failing him by desperately wanting to believe the story told by the doctor. Perhaps he wanted to believe that there was another form of passing on to the afterlife for the tortured souls. The sad, and lonely ones. McCoy would say that the Vulcan is deep in philosophy something that he wasn't specialized in. How many Vuclans in the ancient hall of thoughts found themselves missing their companions? Some would likely deem it illogical as they may meet again in different lives. McCoy, the illogical human, would say that Vulcans are likely thinking about existence itself in that sad small rounded container similar to a glass globe only that it glowed. Not to think about those who they cannot speak with again. "A tragic story when you think about it." McCoy likely would have said. "If it were true."
"If it were true." Spock found himself agreeing to his train of thought out loud.
How was the human handling the knowledge that he was attending trial, anyway? McCoy looked happy, happier than he had been yesterday last Spock had seen him. If Jim gets bored of the Cherik pairing, then they should graduate into another holodeck adventure. If McCoy knew of this arrangement he would be thrilled, or in his words: 'delighted' even when being grumpy about something like "The clothing dispenser made my shirt bigger! I need a new shirt, damn it! Now don't ask me about holodeck adventures when I have a shirt hazard that ranks highest on retirement!" Spock had a soft, low laugh. Just picturing McCoy's reaction made the Vulcan willingly laugh because it could happen to the country doctor. Spock took out his lute from behind the chair then gently began to strum it.
Spock could almost hear the doctor.
You are a noisy thinker, now go to sleep, Spock!
A melody carried out of the musical item. Spock could hear the sounds of the insects out in the field. He saw the fireflies were out in the darkness in the fields of the grass. McCoy would think this was a pretty sight to see. Not every night were there fireflies. They were prominent on the summer nights. The winter nights were silent. McCoy would enjoy the peace and quiet. Say something along the lines of, "Peace and quiet are often a good thing for the soul, or Katra, in your case. Your kind values that." Spock agreed with the doctor. He could feel an ache in his chest. That couldn't be filled. Strange,Spock never experienced this ache in one hundred fifty-eight years of his life. If McCoy knew that Spock was experiencing this unusual ache, the first thing out of his mouth would be: "You missed me! Hah, and here you said it would be illogical to miss someone." The doctor had taken the time to explain how humans felt when someone they held dear was gone shortly after Spock walked in by accident on a grieving session for Marla. Spock had started to turn around then but Sulu was the one who pointed him out and Grief Counselor Richard Blakeson encouraged the Vulcan to come. Spock had been acquainted to Marla.
Some nights Spock and McCoy sat on the balcony. It was starting to become a nightly tradition now that Spock thought of it. McCoy would frown at that and say, "I need my beauty sleep, Spock, you understand that. Can't be every night." And Spock nodded off to thin air.
"I understand that,Doctor." Spock said. "Sleep is a bodily function."
If McCoy were here, he would say something like, "Unlike you Vulcans who claim to be able to be awake for days at a time."
"Which is true." Spock said.
"In a pigs eye." Yes, Leonard would say that.
"Vulcans are fully capable of staying awake for days at a time." Spock said.
"Like you who stayed awake for two days and fell asleep." McCoy would make it a point to remind Spock. "That was when you had insomnia."
"I will admit to that." Spock said.
Spock looked over to see no one was there, except for aching pain in his chest.
Oh Surak, Spock was having a conversation with himself.
"Illogical." Spock said, turning his head away.
Spock resumed strumming the lute getting himself lost in the melody and his muscles were relaxed. The sweet air, the warm cool weather, and the comfortable atmosphere. He was curious of how the bond was developing. If it were still weak. It was likely at its infancy. Weak but growing. How did it even start to begin? It took years for this kind of rarity to grow into a fully operating bond. The logic behind it was lacking and troubling. Spock felt a wave of calm and peace come over him. His fingers absentmindedly began to strum a different melody with his eyes closed. He identified the beat to being country. He was humming along to the melody. Spock was like that for an hour playing different melodies on the lute enjoying the silence. Spock evidently stopped playing the lute, put it away, then returned into the shared quarters closing the door behind him.