Second period comes around, and I walk to my locker to get my SIA (society in advancement) binder and notebook. I already have my planner and the book Before I Fall in my hand. It’s mandatory to bring a book and planner to every class just in case there’s time left at the end or you have to go to the bathroom or something.
As I go down the north hallway, I smell it’s usual odor- drugs, smoke, and alcohol. Being a Junior is more different than being a Sophomore than I had thought it would be. Students have gotten wilder, and more ‘developed.’ It’s almost as if over the summer, everyone took a magic potion that made their boobs bigger, hair colored, and body taller. I don’t really understand it though. I mean, in our friend group, we’ve never even talked about smoking or drinking or doing drugs. It just has never ‘appealed’ to us. We just haven’t seen a need to mess up our brains and bodies- which work pretty well thank you very much.
I turned the corner into what we call the Stoned Stairway. We came up with that name because that’s usually where all of the drug addicts, and dealers, go when they cut class. They just hang out on the stairway and do drugs or whatever.
I go up the stairs to the second floor and head toward room 218. Before I even round the corner, I see Jake. Not just Jake. I see Jake, and Cass Kholeson. They’re talking, laughing even. Jake knows how much I hate Cass, he knows how much I despise her! In that moment I feel angry. Then I realize that it’s probably just for a school project or something.
I start walking further down the hallway toward them. Then I am frozen. I can’t move, can’t breathe right, but I can’t look away. I feel like my heart has shattered into a million pieces. Standing in front of me is my worst nightmare. My boyfriend Jake, is kissing Cass Kholeson. The Cass Kholeson! Cass Kholeson: volleyball star. Cass Kholeson: most popular girl in school. Cass Kholeson: my boyfriend’s second girlfriend.
“You asshole!” I screech, still standing in place.
I see a small grin on Cass’ face. It irritates me. I want to punch her right in the face, mess up that smile, but I’m still stuck to the ground and can’t move. Jake inches closer to me.
“Babe, please.” Jake pleads.
“Please what?!” I yell, “please just forget the fact that you just kissed Cass? Probably not for the first time either!”
“No I,” Jake pauses, “It’s not… Bri… I…”
“Do you want to finish any of those sentences?” I know I’m being a bitch, but I can’t help it. By this point, the bell has rung and everyone is in class except for us and a few druggies.
“I’m gonna go to class baby.” Cass says with a smirk. Then she kisses him on the cheek. And Jake lets her.
“I can’t believe you Jake! I though you… I thought we…” I can feel tears coming, “We’re done.”
I walk off. I go back down the stairs. On my way down the stairs, I hear Jake calling my name. Then I hear his footsteps coming toward me, so I start to pick up my pace. I step on a few druggie’s feet, which usually I would apologize for, but this time I keep walking.
Jake grabs my shoulder, spinning me around so I’m looking at him. His face looks different now. It looks crazier, deeper, not the kind face it used to be.
“Bri,” when it calls me Bri, it reminds me of how Ryder always called me Bridgett because he said it was special, “I don’t like her.”
“Then why were you kissing her?” I demand, holding back tears.
“I… I don’t… It just happened okay?”
“It just happened? That’s crap and you know it!”
I’m trying so hard to hold back tears, telling myself that Jake doesn’t deserve my tears. I tell myself that I cried over Ryder, and Jake is trash compared to Ryder.
“Bri, I love you.”
“Shove it up your ass.” I retort as I walk off toward my locker.
More footsteps behind me. Jake grabs me again, this time holding me by both shoulders, tightly. I try to shrug him off, but his grip is too tight. I always thought of myself as stronger than Jake. He used to appear kind of weak to me. Kind, but weak. Now I look at him, and I see a monster.
“Don’t leave.” His voice is stern.
“Let go of me!” I don’t yell it like I’m scared or anything, I demand it.
“No. We need to talk about this.” Jake grips me tighter.
I am slightly scared at this moment. I say, “Let me go, or I swear to god, I will scream.”
Jake sighs, and let’s go of me. I immediately turn to walk off. I go to my locker, grab my backpack, and storm out of the school. I’ve never cut class before, let alone skip out on an entire school day. The good girl in me forces me to go back into the school and to the admin’s office. I tell the lady at the front desk that I’m not feeling well- which is partially true. The lady looks up something on the computer, then looks back at me. She tells me that she doesn’t see that I’ve ever been to the school nurse or left home sick, so she doesn’t question me. It’s mainly just the kids who want to get out of school, that go to the office once a week that they question and take their temperature. But she just tells me to go ahead.
I practically run out to my car. I open the door and slam it shut. I start to cry. Wet, salty tears start rolling down my face, but I wipe them away. I’m not going to cry over Jake. He doesn’t deserve my tears, my sadness, or me. He doesn’t deserve me.