Future: I realized then, how much I still loved him.
It’s been nearly a year since Ryder moved. I have slowly started to move on. I still miss him though. I miss his smile, his laugh, the way he would hold me in his arms as if he would never let go. I miss our conversations. I miss staying up until 1:00am texting him and over-using the kissy face emoji.
After Ryder left though, other guys started asking me out. I declined every single one. Some of the guys thought I was just playing hard-to-get, so they were persistent. I still held my ground, and remembered Ryder’s smile every time my heart faltered.
Until last week, when Jake Milton asked me out. We had been partners on a biology project together, meeting at the library every day after school. I admit, I started to gradually have feelings for him. I just couldn’t shake Ryder out of my head though.
It was last week on friday, when Jake and I were working on our project together, and he asked me out to the movies. I didn’t even know what movie was playing, but I just said yes. I didn’t know why I agreed so quickly. Neither did any of the other guys who had asked me out.
Jake isn’t really athletic, or popular. But he’s so sweet and very smart. Most of the guys who asked me out before Jake were popular guys, friends of Ryder. Mostly because after Ryder and I started going out, I began to grow in popularity.
More people cared about what I was doing and where I was going. I walked around with a newly found confidence that I never knew I had. I found a new stride. Also, since I’m a Junior now, people look up to me more. My name is better known. I don’t look at the ground anymore as I walk. Instead, I look up and see the world in front of me, and the people around me. It’s kind of nice. I like it.
I haven’t joined the popular girls however, and I never will join their group of prissy, narcissistic, dumb girls.
Within the year, Trish has become president of the honors society. The title fits her, and I can’t think of anyone who deserves the title more. Meg has started dating the new guy who came this year. His name is Zander MIchaels, and he isn’t popular, but he’s a little athletic, very smart, and from what Meg has told me he is very nice and romantic. He has blonde hair, and dark blue eyes. He has a few lightly-colored freckles on his nose. He’s not a perfect ten, but he’s about a seven and a half.
Meg hasn’t stopped talking about him since. Not in a bragging sense, just a head over heels for Zander sense. Meg has been elated since they’ve started going out and I’m extremely happy for her.
Chloe has slowly started to drift out of our group, and join the band group more. Chloe rarely sits with us anymore. Instead, she sits at the table with the most enthusiastic band members.
A new girl moved into town at the beginning of the school year. Her name is Jayde Dawson oddly enough. Spelled differently from the old Jade, and a much different personality. Jayde is extremely nice, maybe even as nice as Trish. She has perfectly curled brown hair that goes down to her waist. She doesn’t wear much makeup, but she is extremely gorgeous. Practically all the guys are begging for her. The popular girls tried to swoop her up, but she was smart and chose us right away.
That’s another thing, she is smart. Not like Trish, Meg and I. Not necessarily school smart, (though she is about average in school), just smart in her decisions, and the way she presents herself.
Jayde has reclined all the boys however, and just focuses on school and volleyball. It works out perfectly. She’s a tall hitter and I’m a strong setter. We play on the A team together, almost as if we are in sync. I’m not the best setter on the team, so I don’t get put in with Jayde all the time. Usually it’s Cass. I can’t argue with that though, Cass is the best player on the team without a doubt. Out second best setter is Rayla Cantyn. Rayla is great at setting, she just isn’t as quick as Cass. I’m the third best setter. I’m faster than both Rayla and Cass, but my sets aren’t as accurate or as high. The fourth best setter is Ella Erick. Ellie is slower than all of us, except Rayla, and is not as accurate. She’s still great though.
Volleyball is great and everything, but it still isn’t very fair. ONly the populars, or the just-popular-enoughs, get on the A team. I’m not really either. I’m just slightly known because I dated Ryder. And since I’m good at volleyball, and slightly known, that’s enough to get me on the A team.
Meg is pretty good at volleyball too. She’s a setter just like me, and she was the second best on the B team when I was on B team too. Not just the second best setter, but she was the second best player on B overall. She deserves to be on the A team too. Even if she isn’t paying all the time, she should at the very least be a sub.
I’ve been trying to talk coach Hutzle into letting Meg play in an A team game sometime, but Hutzle won’t listen. There’s nothing I can do about it, except keep playing my heart out, and using every last bit of what little popularity I have to hold onto.