Yesterday Luke walked me home, even though I wanted him to stay I sent him home. I don't think I can handle my mom meeting him. That didn't mean she didn't see him at the door, she bum barred me with questions as soon as I got through the door. Eventually I got to walk away when I agreed to invite him to dinner on Friday. "He would just laugh at me" This time it wasn't just the voice, it was me too. I knew it, and She knew it.
Luke: Meet me in the music room?
He texted me around 7:50 this morning when I was leaving the house. I smiled and suddenly got nervous. He had been texting me more and more since Tuesday, and I didn't mind, I wanted to enjoy it while it lasted. Suddenly the voices opinion on Luke, took over my own opinion.
I got to school in less than ten minutes, and rushed my way toward the music room. When I got close though I heard a girl's voice. I froze with my hand around the door knob, when I heard her voice. "I wouldn't get to close to Spring if I were you." I knew the voice but from where?
"Why?" Luke's voice was clear even through the door. "She hasn't told you has she?" the girl said again, her voice lower than before. "What?" Luke said, my heart started to pound, no, not like this. "She's schizophrenic. Hears voices, sees things that aren't there." When she said the word I figured it out. I knew exactly who it was. Do it.
With that I turned the knob and walked into the music room, my watered eyes landed on my ex-best friend and half-sister, McKenzie. Why did I come in here? I don't like this.
I didn't bother to look at Luke, she was the only one I had on my mind at the moment. "Are you fucking serious?" The words spilled out of my mouth. It wasn't me talking anymore, it was her. "What the hell McKenzie? You seriously have nothing better to do than ruin my life!" My words weren't my own, Yes I was angry but I didn't want to be here, I didn't want to come in here, and say anything, I wanted to run as far as my legs would take me. I lost control of my own body, my own thoughts, my own words.
"Is that you talking Spring or is it the voice?" she said seriously, no Spring stop. "Whether it's me or the voice, you have no right to go about telling my business, you walked away from me remember? So why are you involving yourself in decisions that aren't yours to make!" I started to yell, no She started to yell with my voice, I was lost somewhere else, watching from a dark corner. "I'm trying to make sure you don't hurt someone again. You not telling him will only cause problems!" she shouted back. I told you he'd find out.
Tears streamed down my face, out the corner of my eye I saw Luke stand up. "Okay then those are my problems to fix! You wanted out, and now you are. Just leave me alone! Stay out of my life, just go! I don't need you to watch over me anymore!" I said, Luke tried to comfort me, but I pulled away.
"Okay, fine but when you hurt him, don't come crying to me." McKenzie said, and even through my own tears She forced me to smiled and laugh. "Like I would." My voice came out cold, and icy, but it cracked. I shook my head and left the room. I heard Luke call my name several times, but I blocked all noises out, the only sound I heard was the voice in my head.
It's okay spring, I'm always here for you. You don't need him. Her voice was calming, as I made my way back out of the school building and back home. When I got home, my mom asked several questions, but I just ran to my room, and locked the door.
I probably cried most of the morning, then I was just in and out of sleep all day. Around 4:00 I decided to go and get some food. I quietly, made my way to the kitchen hoping my mom wouldn't hear me. But with my luck that was just about impossible. She sat at the kitchen table, there was a body across from her, but I couldn't see who because of where my mom was sitting. I was too hungry to give up and run back to my room, so I opened the fridge and searched for something quickly.
"Spring, why didn't you tell me what happened?" my mom called out when she realized I was here. "Because you love McKenzie so much, you wouldn't try to do anything about it." We said it coldly, I still didn't have complete control yet. I closed the fridge pulling out sandwich stuff, I turned around and she was standing behind me.
Like an trigger, tears formed in my eyes. I dropped the sandwich stuff on the counter and wrapped my arms around her. "Sweetheart. I'm so sorry. I don't ever want you to think like that. I love you." she said it so softly, it put my emotions at ease instantly. "I love you too." I said through tears. She pulled away and laughed at my crying face. I pouted but began to laugh through tears.
She grabbed a napkin and wiped my face. "Don't want you looking all snotty in front of your boyfriend." she whispered to me, I looked at her crazy. She stepped to the side and I saw Luke sitting at the table. He looked up at me slowly. "What? What are you doing here?" I said, I kept my distance. "I'm going to take care of some laundry." my mom said excusing herself.
"I feel so horrible about this morning." he said when she was gone. "I had no idea that you were dealing with something. And I don't want you to think I don't like you or anything just because, I just. I hated the way you ran away today." he said grabbing the back of his neck. Don't fall for it, he is just a pretty boy full of lies. "It's not something I wanted you to know. But now you do, so forget about it." I said. "Forget about what?" he said his voice was shaky.
"Me. I understand it I guess, people don't wanna deal with a fucked up person." I said turning away and starting to work on my sandwich. "Wow Spring you're not fucked up." "Yes I am." I sighed. Stop talking to him Spring!
"No you're just different. That doesn't make you any less of a person." he said, I looked back at him. He was standing now, just a few feet away from me. I turned back to my sandwich. "I see things that aren't there, and hear voices nobody else can hear. I'm crazy and everyone knows it." I said being the stubborn person I was. That's exactly right now get rid of him. "Well if that's the case then I like crazy." he said I peaked back at him and he was smirking, I bit my lip and finished making my sandwich. What are you doing?! Stop.
"I should be going, but don't think I'm gonna stop texting you." He said, we were watching TV for like an half hour, and her voice was restless and angry. I looked at him on the other side of the couch, I hadn't said a word since we left the kitchen. "I like you Spring, something like this won't make me just stop liking you. Not everyone is the same." he said standing up. Yea, but for how long? I stood up without a word and walked him to the door. "At least tell me you'll answer my text?" he said hopeful as he opened the door. I looked at him for a minute, don't you dare. "Okay." I whispered, finally having control of my own voice. Luke's smile was so bright when he heard my voice, even if he couldn't understand what I said, he got me to say something and that was all he needed.
"Bye, Spring." He leaned forward, trying to look in my eyes. I tried to forced back a smile from creeping through, but it was strong. I just turned away and closed the door, I warned you. I could hear Luke's laugh through the door. "He seems like a sweet boy." My mom said coming upstairs from the basement, with a basket full of clean clothes. I smiled and blushed. "Need help?" I said changing the subject.
Is it just me or does Spring just have it the absolute worst. I mean yes the other girls have some potentially bad situation, which I'm not gonna spoil, but Spring just doesn't seem to catch a break. Is it just me? I guess in a way Winter will probably have it pretty bad too. But that's not until later in the story.