A Life of Problems [5SOS Fanfiction]

Valerie Smith feels that the world has abandoned her. With her life a mess, she's pretty much given up. But what happens when four guys walk into her life. Will Valerie's life ever change for the better. *Warning: contains topics such as self-harm and anorexia which some may find upsetting. You have been warned.*

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4. Breakfast

Valerie's P.O.V.

I was woken up by my hair tickling my face. I sighed in annoyance and attempted to brush it out of my face. After several failed attempts I quickly realised it wasn't my hair. I opened my eyes to see curly brown hair. I knew who's hair that was. I leaped sideways off the bed. Ashton was still asleep. "What the hell..." I mumbled. Why was he in my room?

As I began to really wake up, I began to remember parts of last night. I had had the nightmare again and... Ashton woke me up. I could remember him going, "It's just a dream."

I wish it was but in reality it was very much real. 

I paced around on the floor. I cursed under my breath. I must have looked like a total baby, crying over the nightmare. "Hey, mind your language." Ashton yawned, he had just woken up and must have heard me. "You shouldn't have come through." I said, a little heated, "I would have been fine."

"It didn't sound like that." Ashton stated.

"I'm not a child! I don't need you babying me!" I snapped.

Ashton stood up, a look of hurt in his eyes. Before he could say anything, I left the room, mumbling about going to the bathroom. I quickly got in, locking the door behind me. I leaned on the sink  and took deep breaths in an attempt to calm my nerves. If this carries on, I'll probably end up back at the orphanage sooner than expected. Looking, into the mirror, I saw that my eyes were red and puffy from the crying. I looked like a mess. Frustrated, I splashed cool water on my face in an attempt to look more presentable. I eventually got half way to looking decent. Composing myself, I took a deep breath and exited the bathroom.

Everyone was in the kitchen. Ashton didn't look up when I came over. I couldn't tell how he's feeling. Angry? Sad? I couldn't tell. Breakfast was pancakes. I began to feel sick looking at them. Luke sat a plate of pancakes in front of me. "Enjoy!" He smiled. I wanted to hate him for giving me the food but he was only being nice. While everyone dug in, I scraped at the pancakes with a fork. My mind raced for an idea to get out of eating. I felt guilt at what I was doing but I just couldn't eat it. "Are you okay?" Calum's gentle voice broke me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah, perfectly fine!" I lied. I tried to act like everything was normal.

"You haven't eaten a bite." Michael pointed out. It felt like he was trying to get me into trouble but he didn't know about my... issue. He was only stating the obvious.

"Ha, yeah, you're right," I said in a chirpy tone, "I was just caught up in my thoughts."

There was no way out of it. Everyone was watching me. I cut the smallest piece of pancake I could get away with. My hand trembled slightly as I raised it to my mouth. Actually eating it was horrible. It tasted like cardboard and the texture made me want to gag. But I did all I could to look like I was loving it. "Delicious." I said after I swallowed, even though my mind was screaming the opposite.

It was a long task. Each bite was like torture. Every part of me felt like I was drinking poison. Somehow I managed to chew through most of the pancakes. I eventually stopped, I couldn't eat any more. "Wow, I'm stuffed!" I smiled, Luke and Michael exchanged an unconvinced smile but said noting of it. "May I be excused." I stood up from the table and left before I could get a response.

I collapsed into the bathroom. Locking the door, I went over to the sink. I choked as I lent on it. Parts of my mind screamed at me:

Why did you eat it?                                                                                                              Should be ashamed...

                                 Disgusting...

                                                                                                     Do you want to get fat?

Idiot...

 

The thoughts swirled around in my head. There were so many. This time, I actually felt physically sick. I couldn't hold it back...

 

I rinsed the sink out. until nothing was left. My eyes were streaming and even now I was still gagging. Again I was left to freshen up and pretend everything was fine.

 

 

Ashton P.O.V

Valerie hurried away from the table before anyone could say anything. "I'm worried about her." Calum said, furrowing his brow in concern. "I don't want to be that guy but..." Luke hesitated, we looked at him expectantly, "I think she may have an eating disorder."

"That's not unreasonable," Michael agreed, "Her behaviour was a bit strange."

"Guys!" I pleaded, "Everything's new for her. It's probably just nerves." I didn't want to think that there was something wrong but my gut instinct was telling me to watch out for Valerie.

"So, what are you waiting for? Will you do something when she drops to the ground from being malnourished?" Calum retorted. I sighed, "Just give it a few days. If nothing changes, I'll take action okay?" The guys all nodded in agreement but I could tell they were still concerned.

I went to Valerie's room. thankfully she was there. She looked upset when I first came in but put on a smile quickly. "Hey," I said,  a little akwardly, "Do you have a mobile phone?"

"No. Miss Heather couldn't afford to give everyone at the orphanage one. That and could you imagine the phone bills several kids would end up making?" She laughed.

"Yeah I guess," I laughed along, "well that settles it. I think it's necessary you have a phone so you can stay in contact if you go out."

"But... phone's aren't cheap..." She tried to change mind.

"It's worth the price to make sure you can call for help if need be," I stated, "get ready. We'll leave in a hour or so."

As I walked out her room, I was nearly ran over by Calum who was shouting, "I'm showering first!". He was quickly followed by Michael saying, "No! I am!". Michael then proceeded to tackle Calum to the ground. As they fought for who was getting in first, Luke calmly walked by to the bathroom, before shutting the door, he said, "I'm first."

Calum and Michael were left to moan outside. "Does that happen often?" Valerie asked.

"Yep." I said, shaking my head.

 

A/N

Yay! Another Chapter! Please leave a comment below. I would also appreciate it if you could maybe fav or like this (maybe both?). I would like to know if people like this. I'm also considering writing a Luke Hemmings Bad Boy fanfiction. Let me know if you like the sound of that so I know if there would be interested readers. Thanks and I'll get the next chapter out soon as possible.

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